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Is my boyfriend vulnerable?

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  • Is my boyfriend vulnerable?

    My boyfriend and I rarely do the same workouts at the gym. He doesn’t lift heavy weight, actually. We just have different schedules. Sometimes we work out together and lift close to same weight, depending on the exercise. He runs a lot and does HIIT style workouts and yoga. We decided to commit to a workout together, such as a class. So, we started doing some power yoga and a defense class at our gym.

    During practice in this class, not a week into it, we were partnered up to spar. The instructor matched my boyfriend up against a 12-year-old boy. My boyfriend sort of laughed, but the boy had been training there for a while and asked to go against my boyfriend. He lost to a 12 year old boy wrestling and it wasn’t even close. My boyfriend is about 160, 5’10 and 33. The boy I think was like 115ishlbs and around 5’2.

    The boy actually lifted my boyfriend’s feet from the mat and took him down and it was pretty much over from there as my boyfriend wasn’t even able to toss him off or turn him over. The boy seemed strong for his age and size, and not to mentioned fast and knew what he was doing. It ended with him putting my boyfriend in a headlock that made his face red….

    Now I think I have a chance of winning against him, since he seems to be more of an endurance athlete than strength. He is by no means is unhealthy or out of shape. Maybe he could lift heavier and become stronger? Maybe there is a certain strength that comes from training in wrestling for a while, such as what the boy had. I think he’d been wrestling/grappling for two or more years. His uncle was a wrestler and the instructor.

    I wonder if too much sex or masturbation is making him weaker, especially for a sport like grappling and wrestling, and lifting weights? Does he losing to the 12 year old boy tell me he’s vulnerable? I still like him, however.


  • As best I know sex and/or masturbation does not make a person weaker. If your boyfriend had been stronger, he may have still lost to the 12 year old due to the training and mastery the boy displayed in the match. If he wants to win, he will have to take similar training and master it. By then the boy will be older and may still be able to beat him.
    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
    ...
    Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

    From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

    Comment


    • I agree with jns. I'm not aware of any studies or facts related to masturbation or sex causing a man to be weaker. I've heard guys say they prefer NOT to have sex right before the gym because the sexual release depletes their energy for a bit. But nothing long term.

      Perhaps being the strongest dude in the room just isn't a priority for him? Some people prefer a more low impact kind of exercise. Additionally, adrenaline can turn even the "weakest" person into a beast. If I were put in a staged setting to "fight"or wrestle like that, I would be no good. But put me in a situation where I'm in true threat, and I become stronger than I can even fathom.

      Is he bothered by his strength level, or is it you that is bothered by it?
      Last edited by Ashlee T.; 05-14-2019, 09:03 AM.
      "Be what you're looking for."

      Comment


      • Originally posted by Ashlee T. View Post
        I agree with jns. I'm not aware of any studies or facts related to masturbation or sex causing a man to be weaker. I've heard guys say they prefer NOT to have sex right before the gym because the sexual release depletes their energy for a bit. But nothing long term.

        Perhaps being the strongest dude in the room just isn't a priority for him? Some people prefer a more low impact kind of exercise. Additionally, adrenaline can turn even the "weakest" person into a beast. If I were put in a staged setting to "fight"or wrestle like that, I would be no good. But put me in a situation where I'm in true threat, and I become stronger than I can even fathom.

        Is he bothered by his strength level, or is it you that is bothered by it?
        Hi Ashley. I'm not so bothered by his strength level than I am bit surprised. He doesn't take the shape of a powerlifter or strong man, more of an endurance athlete. But I will admit how helpless he looked wrestling/grappling against the 12 year old boy and it made me questions is strength and ability to defend himself, as most men seem to be able to. But perhaps not. I think my boyfriend was just a little humiliated being dominated by a smaller boy in wrestling. Thanks for the response!

        Comment


        • Originally posted by jns View Post
          As best I know sex and/or masturbation does not make a person weaker. If your boyfriend had been stronger, he may have still lost to the 12 year old due to the training and mastery the boy displayed in the match. If he wants to win, he will have to take similar training and master it. By then the boy will be older and may still be able to beat him.
          Thank you, Jen.I agree the boy simply has a lot more training, which I think also build the specific strength that goes along with training in this sport, especially the core and upperbody. A wrestler vs a runner with little to know grappling experience.

          Comment

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