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How do you protect yourself?

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  • How do you protect yourself?

    Not meaning to exclude our gentleman, tho' I am more interested in the ladies perspective.

    What do you do for protection? In college I took a self defense class every other semester on campus, just to keep skills sharp. After being married and the busyness of life, I got away from it. I recently started in classes again, and I'm saddened by my weakness but happy that I am back at it.

    I think as women we forget our vulnerability, "out in the wild".

    I had an incident a few months ago that reminded me why I should be more careful, mindful and prepared. Pair that with the crime in my city, and I have a responsibility to do all I can to protect myself.

  • #2
    Self-defense training is always good to have. The benefits have been documented long enough.
    Another aspect, maybe less known of the self-defense is to read situations before things escalate into a physical confrontation.
    This skill is the most important one to possess.
    I would not recommend to use the fighting techniques only as the last resort, when one was not able to prevent the confrontation (not able to run, nor able to use the pepper spray).

    Behold the presence of the Father in all beings...

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    • #3
      My friend and I were just discussing this.

      I believe understanding self defense techniques and preparation are the best combats. For example, if I hear someone breaking into my home am I better off to grab a pistol and try to confront and shoot them, OR am I better off to quickly find furniture and other things I can barricade whatever room I'm in with so that the police have time to arrive before the criminal can get to me? I vote for the latter. Perhaps if I own a gun I would have it with me in case the criminal did make his/her way to me, but attacking them would be my last resort. As women, we must not forget that despite our strength and wit, we can most often easily be overpowered by an adrenaline pumped man.

      When I'm out and about alone, I try to be very mindful of my surroundings. No matter where I am, I try to never appear lost or touristy. I try to carry myself with confidence but not draw attention to myself. If I notice someone who I believe is acting a bit shady, I try to make it very obvious that I see them, I acknowledge them, and I am onto them. I believe that I am best suited to try to outsmart someone than I am to physically battle them. But at the same time, I want to be prepared if I ever have to.

      "Be what you're looking for."

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      • #4
        Totally agree. Awareness is the first thing they reinforce. Eye contact. Body language. I much prefer to avoid if possible.

        There are a lot of young women in class, and older women. I bet I'm the only 40-something, and I'd guess no women in their 30's. Interesting dynamic. It's been a rather light hearted, but disciplined class so far. Last night, however, they tried to teach us a technique to buy ourselves time if we're taken behind by the neck in a choke hold, and if it is someone who knows what they're doing, we have 3 to 4 seconds until we lose consciousness. Stuff got real in a hurry.
        A few of the ladies offered other maneuvering to try...saying this and that and I got the impression that they didn't realize how serious this one was. This would be game over if I couldn't manage this technique very quickly.

        Instructors brought it to discussion just how quickly things can get very bad for us. I think it was an eye opener for some of us. Certainly changed the tone of the class. Also helped us all realize how tiring it is to fight, and how it may take cops several minutes to arrive, IF they even know someone is in trouble. We have to learn to sustain ourselves until we can get away or help can get there for us.
        Have a plan, and realize the time has come, and realize... We are going to be hurt in the fuss.

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        • #5
          Looks like you got yourself a very good class !
          I would push the realism into actually implementing those 3-4 seconds in a real situation where holds are applied effectively and see how everyone reacts.
          I have been training and fighting for the last 30years. Only countless drills can prepare you for that moment.
          Therefore being really good at awareness and avoiding confrontation are the best options.
          I am always concerned that the self-defense class gives a false sense of confidence that one can handle him/herself in a real fight.
          Behold the presence of the Father in all beings...

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          • #6
            One place I worked required self defense classes.

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            • #7
              Maximus, they have said as much in class; that this is not going to make us absolutely secure. I've appreciated their attempts to boost our ability without instilling false security. That's a fine balance to strike, especially with some young women who seem to believe that they truly are equal to men in every single way.

              There is one woman instructor, and she is a leo. She is pretty blunt and she's been the one reminding us a lot that fighting hurts a lot. Prepare for the pain and don't let it stop us when and if we are hurt in a physical attack. She has given some great feedback on fighting with men bigger and faster, more experienced and while she has all the uniform and equipment on that officers are wearing these days. She said that realizing her physical difference with men inspired her to be more skilled in hand to hand fighting, and building confidence, because we can't change biology. She's been realistic and really inspired me. Watching her has made me want to learn more techniques.

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              • #8
                Well, in Grand Style, as usual...I was "fighting" tonight, twisted my knee wrong and I was down for the count... Lol. I really hate making a commotion in that sense, and they had to bring me a chair and ice... It was ugly. I've not been so embarrassed in a long time.

                I'm sure it isn't serious but I sprained or hyperflexed my knee I think. Hurts but I'm more injured mentally.

                Lol

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                • #9
                  In an ideal world I'd be a ninja but I'm not. I just avoid dangerous areas: especially at night. I am cautious and always tell friends and family where I'm going and where I am. I am street wise, so keep my wits about me. It isn't always obvious but there is so much crime in the world and it can be a dangerous world. Still, you can't let that make you feel you're doomed or the world is doomed. This is the way the world will always be. It's how you handle it that counts.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by atskitty2 View Post
                    Well, in Grand Style, as usual...I was "fighting" tonight, twisted my knee wrong and I was down for the count... Lol. I really hate making a commotion in that sense, and they had to bring me a chair and ice... It was ugly. I've not been so embarrassed in a long time.

                    I'm sure it isn't serious but I sprained or hyperflexed my knee I think. Hurts but I'm more injured mentally.

                    Lol
                    I hope you have a swift recovery !
                    There is nothing to be embarrassed about. It's bound to happen.
                    "On ne peut pas faire d'omelette sans casser des oeufs"
                    Behold the presence of the Father in all beings...

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Wow! I'm so glad you brought up this topic, kitty. It's near and dear to my heart since men are more often the victims of violent crime. There's so much I have to say!!!

                      Originally posted by atskitty2 View Post
                      I am more interested in the ladies perspective.
                      Oh. Nevermind.
                      "Those sowing seed with tears
                      Will reap with a joyful shout." - Psalm 126

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Doesn't mean you need not share, Mr Still!
                        Please do!
                        Will be interesting to open up the thread for more broad discussions... Or start a new thread.

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                        • #13
                          I was lying, but it was to make a point, so it's okay.

                          Seriously though, this is a good topic. I have often thought about a self-defense course for us. I just worry about how "defensive" measures often seem to be more offensive and change the one wielding them. I want to be safe, but I don't want to learn how to hurt people. I take Jesus' words about living and dying by the sword very seriously, but I still struggle with the concept.

                          I just had a gun pointed at me a couple of days ago. I'm sure the guy who did it would swear that he carries it solely to protect himself. But he probably doesn't realize how it has warped his thinking.

                          To answer your question, I and the lady in my life protect ourselves by relying on God.
                          Last edited by Stillness; 06-02-2017, 08:21 AM. Reason: Answering the question
                          "Those sowing seed with tears
                          Will reap with a joyful shout." - Psalm 126

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Stillness View Post
                            To answer your question, I and the lady in my life protect ourselves by relying on God.
                            I believe we can rely on God, but we also need to take action too

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Still, I think, as with anything else, don't let the few foolish ones influence your choices on something. I don't know the circumstances around why someone pointed a gun at you, but I have a strong suspicion you were not burglarizing his garage?
                              There will always be people that get guns to fill the lack of personal confidence/conflict resolution skills they have, and use it as some sort of control and intimidation because they cannot use their mentality and communication to settle the least conflict, and violence is just their preferred method. Those are precisely the people who shouldn't have them.

                              The point is personal strength, ability and confidence. This class taught me some renewed awareness, some tools to at least TRY if I'm ever in a physical confrontation. Most people are peaceful, sensible, and not looking to escalate any and all possible conflict.

                              I think you have a misguided notion of what it means to learn self-protection, if you think that the majority of folks then go on the offensive. Hasn't been my experience at all.
                              Quite the contrary, actually. We aren't learning how to hurt people, as you put it. We're learning how to prevent people from hurting us. I have no interest in learning to be a UFC fighter, or a badass of any sort, but learning some skills to get away from someone meaning me harm, is the responsible thing to do. If inflicting some pain on someone hurting me is what it takes to save my life, or my body, then so be it.
                              He/she will know quickly that I won't go down easily, and maybe they'll choose to move on without further contact. I certainly have no will to fight or hurt anyone, but I will defend myself if need be. Counting only on instincts or desire to survive in those moments, is not wise either. Using our brain is good, but we may need to fight. Stats are on my side that I'll never face a physical attack, but...I want to be prepared.

                              I don't carry a gun. I'm not against that, and may pursue that some day, but not right now. Not sure I could ever get comfortable with that on the daily.

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