Women’s Health Interactive Forums

  • If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.


No announcement yet.

I feel unfeminine

  • Filter
  • Time
Clear All
new posts

  • I feel unfeminine

    I've been really insecure about my body most of my life. I feel completely unfeminine. I'll soon be 22.
    My facial features are more masculine than feminine (small eyes, large nose, thin lips, long shaped face, kind of big chin). I am tall (172cm), skinny (even though I eat like horse), A-cup breasts, completely flat butt, undefined waist.. I know that none of these assets ON THEIR OWN define femininity, but not having any of these features at all leaves me feeling quite helpless. I don't compare myself to any one body "ideal", I just wish I had more "softness" and generally feminine features, or at least ONE..

    For instance I see many threads where girls will complain about their "small" B-cup breasts (which isn't even small..), but will generally have other lovely assets such as a beautiful face, bum, hips whatever (which they even confirm themselves). They are still obviously feminine even though they feel they lack in an area. But I genuinely feel that I don't have ANY assets, and it really gets me down sometimes, even though I try not to think about it. What can I do to feel better about myself?

    Sorry for whining.

  • Femininity is a state of mind more than a body shape. Make up is your friend for making yourself appear more femme no matter what you look like... and its likely you don't have a good grasp on just how pretty you actually are... sometimes we are so focused on what we don't like to see the beauty in everything else.

    Lipstick can make the thinnest of lips appear more voluptious
    A little eyeliner and mascera = instant bedroom eyes
    Some highlights in your hair can brighten your face...
    Blowdrying and style your hair to give it more body and volume can add to the looks of femininity.

    You sound thin, count your blessings... a lot of men prefer slim to any number of curves on an overweight woman. Focus on the fact you have a sleek, modelesque physique... most fashion models have no curves .

    Wear tight fitting tops, the flattest of breasts can look extremely feminine and hot in a tight tshirt... especially with no bra and your perkyness being very evident... perky nips are a bigger turn on for most guys than the biggest saggy breasts.

    You sound tall... a pair of short shorts / hot pants can make your legs go on for days and you sound thin enough to pull that off...

    Heels can push out your rear assets and add some shape to your legs.

    A shorter shirt that shows a little bit of your lower back and lower stomach that hint of skin in an area that is flat and toned is very sexy on a thin body type.

    I think you just have to work with what you have and being slim and tall are 2 very good things working in your favor... you can take all those same things that make you feel boyish and use them to make you look like a hot runway model... its all how you showcase it... how you feel about yourself and the confidence you exude.
    Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.


    • I would be willing to bet a guy would not think of your butt being as you describe it. Having been with a very slender girl before, it can be a turn on to to be with a girl with a small butt. The same goes with small breasts.

      The ladies will have to help you out with the particulars, but I believe proper use of rouge on your cheeks will give them a hollowed look which will make your chin seem narrower. HD has some great suggestions.
      I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
      Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

      From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia


      • What about your hair? Hair plays a big part in looking femenine, and if you have great hair (no matter if it's straight, wavy, curly, blonde, red, brunette, pink, blue, whatever...) it helps a lot. And it doesn't have to be long, although if you have shiny, pretty hair, grow it! However, if you prefer another style, it always helps to go to a salon and get a hairdresser to help you pick a style that suits your face best. It doesn't have to be long.

        I agree with Hopeless. You sound like you have a thin body. Modelesque. This is a good thing. I mean, just because you have some "masculine" features, it doesn't mean you look unfemenine. Many models have "masculine" features. Like Agyness Deyn, and she hardly looks unfemenine. Make up and clothes make a difference, too. Being thin you can wear almost anything!

        Also, eyes are usually pretty by themselves. Just because they're not enormous it doesn't mean they're not pretty. Play up your eye color, all eye colors are beautiful.

        And you probably have GREAT legs! A lot of women would kill for great legs (me included, I have fleshy thighs, a bit stumpy), you're tall and skinny, so you most likely have these great legs, which I assure you, they DO NOT look like a man's legs (I haven't even seen you and I know this). Guys have very different legs than girls. So show of your legs with short shorts, mini skirts (or skirts in general), dresses and heels. This looks femenine and hot.

        You know, your body sounds delicate. So work it. Almost no woman has "all femenine" features, even though sometimes we miss this. Just like not all guys have all masculine features, and this is good, it gives balance to our bodies and faces. I have seen many a "girly" looking guy, and it doesn't detract from their attractiveness, or the fact that you can clearly identify them as men. Same goes for women. I don't even think you look as masculine as you may think, so try not to worry.

        Femininity does go in the mind more, though, like Hopeless said. So even though sometimes it's hard (I should know), just keep that in mind.
        Last edited by Silly Girl; 09-07-2010, 02:35 PM.


        • Oh, and about small breasts, I have B cups, and yes I admit I'm one of those insecure girls, but not really. I mean, what bothers me about having small breasts is that to me, small breasts are very femenine, they are just as good as big breasts. That's what I think. What bothers me is that most people and the media believe that bigger is better, and it irritates me because they're breasts too, they just have extra fat or mammary tissue, but in concept they're exactly the same thing, so why should size make a difference? It shouldn't!

          So for the record, even though I'd like to have bigger breasts because I'm an insecure idiot who cares too much about what men think (and my ex hurt my self confidence badly with his stupid comments), it's not because I think small breasts are unfemenine. Rather, they're very femenine, but under-appreciated.


          • I have searched high & low to find someone with similar problems.... here is my story...I am 35yrs & always had strong features always got told I looked like "taylor dane", 2 unlimited" around when I was young always got told I was a stunner. I have very strong eastern looks as my grandfather was from yemen(saudi) so as you can imagine I have unique looks (used too) now, I am not 100% on if it is this but I feel it has a lot to do with I suffered from bulimia from the age of 17yrs & the only thing I can think of is that this has stripped some of my features away also I know age added but this male look came from out of nowhere & ruining my life I have big breasts curvy figure I still don;t get why people think I am a male I have really really long black hair ,make up,& done some glamour model not very much) when I was young??? and before you say its in my head I have been told to my face also kids have stated kids never lie not intentionally...The first shock came to my attention about 4/5 years a go I was talking to a man on a dating site on web cam then in mid convo he said "can I ask you something? did you used to be a man" as you can imagine I was devastated, a further 2 men went on to say this? kids have whispered to their parents "is that a man" once at a fleet foxes concert I over heard a girl saying to her BF the same too as you can imagine over these years I have become more n more recluse its eating away at me I travel to see my BF because I have too although he says that people look because I am beautiful (bless him)I know because I see people snigger or they are trying to work out if I am female also word from mouth is the source...Travel has become hard even to my local shop and any which way I can to avoid the house I will its crazy to think I used to have so much cofindence now I can't look people in the eye!!! on the tube I am sick with worry of humiliation & worse still I just had a nose job because I thought it might have been my arabic nose that was kind of the problem but no it hasn't changed a thing(except my bulimia has subsided and I gave up smoking)! All that pain & my BF money has done nothing I am at my wits end now I crave to get back into society to work to be a team but most of all for my son's to see a mother with cofindence....I can not explain how I look now but I am not an average person look I have tried different make up,I will be lighting my hair I was told that lifts you but isn't sad how society can really control your life it really makes me mad & sad...Sorry I needed to get this of my shoulders snuz if you need to chat I understand totally & if anybody knows any sites with this subject or any advice please let me know thankyou xx


            • I thankfully have a ginormous booty... It's not as awesome as you think, gets in the way of being able to wear those cute tight jeans!! My legs n stomach might be able to get in a size 3, but my **** says nope, size 9. Lol. EVERY woman is insecure, let me tell you that right now. I've never met a single girl who didn't hate ATLEAST 2 things about her looks, that's not even getting into themselves personally.... If you REALLY want some good tips, I've been asked if I was a man or woman from age 13 till now (bout 19) so I KNOW how it feels, and have found some of the best things to fix like, everything. Lol. But I gotta see a picture to help you from there... I'm a very visual person. I don't need nudes, or anything special like that... Just average photo, atleast waist up, but preferably full. Sorry if I sound creepy or boundary crossing, I genuinely like trying to help people ^_^


              Womens Health orange logoGet The Newsletter

              Receive our passionately crafted, medically reviewed articles and insights — the stuff nobody else talks about but you want to know — delivered right to your inbox.

              Latest Posts in Our Forums


              Latest Topics in Our Forums


              • Treatment for Perimenopause Anxiety?

                Hello guys, What to do about perimenopause symptoms. Several treatments have been studied for managing perimenopausal symptoms. I am confuse, Please help...

                05-13-2020, 08:43 AM By Heyperry
              • isolated as a family

                husband, preteen, and I have been isolated from others for weeks now

                at a loss for how to fill that "peer" need for preteen...

                05-08-2020, 11:20 PM By amy40
              • Lulu.com

                Is an online bookshop, where everyone self publishes their work. If you're interested, then Google it.

                As I always say, this is NOT spam:...

                05-06-2020, 07:03 AM By Popcorn&Candy
              • Dr & what would u do if anything

                husband needed Dr note to continue work at home
                he's at higher risk
                his longtime Dr did not want to get involved & said if he gave note,...

                05-04-2020, 01:35 AM By amy40