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What are your patterns ?

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  • What are your patterns ?

    We have all kinds of patterns.
    They generally kick in when dealing with events that set an unrest in us, and in order to deal with those, we have developed a set of patterns (good and bad) to get by.

    So what are your patterns ?

    PS: I did this exercise few years ago to help me identify the signals and develop the right behaviors in time, i.e. before it's too late (in some cases)
    Behold the presence of the Father in all beings...

  • I want to answer this....because I have been dealing with a period of "unrest" lately. If by unrest you mean, lots of stress. Could you give me an example of some of your own patterns so I can understand how to better answer?
    "Be what you're looking for."


    • One of mine, I recognized some years back, is that when I sense someone around me is tensing. I get an urge to clean. It goes back to childhood efforts to placate a parent with anger issues.


      • Bad: I lose focus on how to solve it
        Good: I still have the "belief"
        Bad: I question the belief
        Good: I re-afirm the belief

        So, in other words I go around in circles make myself so tired that all I want to do is nothing and sleep...

        When I am not so tired, though I Bog down start doing figures, ideas, so I know where I am and work out a plan to get where I am needing to go, in the case of relationships there are no figures so I sit and ponder and work out how ....


        • Im not sure if this is the right answer,
          But when im stressd (Example making thanksgiving dinner by my self)
          I tend it loose my mind a bit. Ill talk to my self repeating things ive done, or need to do.
          Ill say it over and over again even though no matter how many times Ive said it
          It hasnt changed lol
          And I say Okay alot. Okay. OKAY okay Oh kay o.K.
          Like almost as a mental check list, but im not checking anything off (unless its subconcious lol)

          i hope that was the right answer (I didnt really understand the topic)


          • My problems all have a physical trigger
            receive too much sunlight or stop sleeping for unknown reason despite massive dosages of sleeping pills
            begin to hate all people and interaction
            ban self from forums before saying inappropriate or mean things to people
            withdrawal from all offline interaction
            do not leave blacked out bedroom until after the sun begins to set
            log in to depression chat for 48hrs

            2 days later recover from lack of sleep/sunlight issue
            begin to get bored
            get depressed from boredom
            start martial arts and offline interactions again
            return to forums

            wait for a repeat


            • I'm still trying to figure out my patterns. Why is this post so hard for me!?
              "Be what you're looking for."


              • The thread is not easy to respond because it's asking people to look at themselves without any judgement,
                but simply identify how they react sometimes negatively to a sequence of events.

                In order to help get the responses, we can give a list of emotional buttons and see how you relate to them:
                ** Angry
                ** Powerless
                ** Not good enough
                ** Sad
                ** Joy/Over-joy
                ** Resentful

                To name a few.
                With these in mind, it's probably to find what's get you going so to speak.

                If we see our reactions to these buttons as an electric fuses, the goal is not to burn them all, or reach your boiling point but rather adjust in time.
                Behold the presence of the Father in all beings...


                • One of my first patterns when non-positive events occur is to withdraw. Then depending on the event and emotion involved determines my next response. I'll let anger build up to the point of explosion which more times than not only excasperates the problem.

                  Events in which I don't have control over I tend to contemplate and just try to ride it out.


                  • One of mine has to do with patience. I am very patient, and will tolerate a lot of things.
                    But in the background, a lot of my fuses are being burned, and before I know my last just went off and I can't take the slightest thing. Direct manifestation: Stop all discussions/topics/actions and ask the people involved to leave, in no time.

                    Another one of mine, unfortunately, only affecting my SO, is when upset I not only shutdown, but start living as she doesn't exist at all. I am working on this one, because it's particularly destructive.
                    Behold the presence of the Father in all beings...


                    • ** Angry
                      ** Powerless
                      ** Not good enough
                      ** Sad
                      ** Joy/Over-joy
                      ** Resentful
                      The toughest emotions/feelings for me are: feelings of being powerless, feeling of not being good enough. I realize as I get older that most of my fears come from the fear of not being in control in that situation. My fear of flying, my fear of being trapped etc. These are instances in which I am out of control.

                      What I'm having trouble with, is that I don't outwardly express those fears, or sadness, or feeling powerless or not good enough. They are very real, very present, but I internalize them and they come out of me in other ways. (i.e. bad dreams, neck breaking out in "the flare", rapid heart rate, picking my thumbs until they hurt..etc) I find that I almost ALWAYS wear a smile regardless of what turmoil is going on inside of me. And while people admire that, it's probably hard on the physical body in the long run.

                      I guess in other words, it's just all internal for me. I dont know how to pin-point what I "do" like the others have said, because I don't really do anything different outwardly. I hope this makes sense.
                      "Be what you're looking for."


                      • I tend to internalize everything. I'm pretty introverted. The only way I feel I can get an excess of any emotion out is to write... a lot. It helps me sort of decompress just to get it all out without throwing my emotional garbage on another person. Usually I can reread it the next day and approach the issue from a more logical standpoint and find many ways to solve, adjust, or just be able to accept whatever was causing the issue. I just know that when my adrenaline is pumping from whichever emotion is putting me into overdrive, I'm not in a good place to make hasty actions, assumptions or accusations. I feel a lot worse when I do. And when someone/something is pushing me to act immediately, I tend to panic and my mind will completely blank out and seems to make those thoughts pretty much inaccessible anyway.


                        • Bumping
                          Behold the presence of the Father in all beings...


                          • When I get worked up, stressed, anxious, tense I notice I tend to pace around a lot. I was on the phone one day talking to a friend (I had been angry and upset) it wasn't till after I got of the phone that I realized I had been pacing up and down for about 40 mins in my living room that I had actually worked up a sweat lol

                            I tend to do a fair bit of pacing, this comes down to anxiety issues.

                            I am an over thinker, I always read way more into things and make what would be a normal situation into a big issue. I don't know how to over come this though. I think it comes a lot from family issues since I was a kid and being hurt badly in relationships! I have no trust and am very quick to jump to conclusions that everyone is only out to hurt me and close myself of or somehow push them away. It's a big problem at the moment


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