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BC or perimenopausal

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  • BC or perimenopausal

    Hi All,




    pls help educate me. My wife has some months ago had all the symptoms of either, some form of birth control OR starting of perimenopause. We have some relationship issues... married for 15+ years, kids etc... I try to decide if she has used some form of birth control, either emergency or IUD(also can be emergency), ring, or shot.




    Physical symptoms I seen at the time are.




    -Tired, very.

    -vomit for few times.

    -nausea for some days.

    -stomach bloating and weight gain.

    -Acne(chin, jaw line, then also cheek and forehead) not much on cheek and forehead, more on chin that continued for months.

    -cramps, more than usual.

    -head ache

    -high blood pressure

    -late menstruation by about 2 days, and then heavy

    -Appeared to not ovulate for couple months after this.




    -leading up to the above symptoms far more moody than before.

    -refuses to see OBY or MD about it at the time and also now.




    Can the above be perminenopause or not really and it is much more likely to be some form of birth control. If the list of symptoms is not enough to determin, what things symptoms would be for sure enough to determine if cause is birth control or perimenopause.




    Hint, I have vasectomy, no need for birth control. So birth control that I am not told about would be an issue.. If I could just ask her, I would not make this post







    Thanks, it is a great help to get some expert opinions on this.

  • How old is your wife? At what age did she start menstruating? Did the doctor prescribe any type of hormones that would affect her cycle? Has she been on antibiotics? Has she been prescribed any other type of medication? Is she under a great deal of stress? Is she exercising too much? Has she gained/lost weight recently? All these questions need to be answered prior to anyone knowing (even guessing) if she is in peri or on birth control.
    If you want to be certain - ask her.
    That which we forget may as well never really happened.

    Comment


    • I agree with the idea to ask her. In this case however I have vasectomy, so the only likely reason would be in support of a secret affair. There are some other behaviors that would support that idea unfortunately. I'll try to answer your suggest additional questions. I have for sure suggested visit to MD and or OB for check up. She is not interested in doing so.

      wife is 42.
      started when young, about 12 as I understand.
      no prescriptions of any kind that I know of.
      she CAN be under stress as a possible reason.
      she has gained weight slowly but consistent in the form of abdomen bloating and some in hips/thighs since the suspected time of birth control start.
      No she does not exercise too much, about once a week jogging a quarter or half mile and then walking about 3 days a week for one or two miles.

      If any other info would help, pls ask.

      Comment


      • StormySea, women do take hormonal birth control pills for reasons other than preventing pregnancy. They are hormones, and do many things in our body, controlling ovulation and fertility being just possible effects.

        If you're trying to "figure out" whether or not your wife is cheating on you, perhaps all the energies with these pursuits would best be invested in a discussion that demonstrates your genuine concern for her health status. If she's not willing to open up to you, asking her why she is uncomfortable doing so may be a worthwhile investment of your time as well.

        At age 42, she is very likely experiencing some hormonal changes that can do some devastating things to her physically, mentally and emotionally. I was in full menopause at 42, and it happened rather quickly for me, and was a terrible time in my life. She needs support, not suspicion.

        She may be cheating, I don't know, but from what you indicate, there are many other plausible reasons for her behavior. Please give the benefit of the doubt until you know for sure. If you're approaching her with this on your mind, you'll very likely shut her down, and close the doors of communication. Keeping those doors open is the best way to successfully navigate the difficult days ahead.

        Comment


        • Originally posted by atskitty2 View Post
          StormySea, women do take hormonal birth control pills for reasons other than preventing pregnancy. They are hormones, and do many things in our body, controlling ovulation and fertility being just possible effects.

          If you're trying to "figure out" whether or not your wife is cheating on you, perhaps all the energies with these pursuits would best be invested in a discussion that demonstrates your genuine concern for her health status. If she's not willing to open up to you, asking her why she is uncomfortable doing so may be a worthwhile investment of your time as well.

          At age 42, she is very likely experiencing some hormonal changes that can do some devastating things to her physically, mentally and emotionally. I was in full menopause at 42, and it happened rather quickly for me, and was a terrible time in my life. She needs support, not suspicion.

          She may be cheating, I don't know, but from what you indicate, there are many other plausible reasons for her behavior. Please give the benefit of the doubt until you know for sure. If you're approaching her with this on your mind, you'll very likely shut her down, and close the doors of communication. Keeping those doors open is the best way to successfully navigate the difficult days ahead.
          thank you. yes, am try to figure that out. for now there is so many evidence that it is an overwhelming yes. All but live video... I have loved my wife much, so struggleing to find anything that will disagree with a yes... She is a smart girl, so any real evidence is missing, but so much, too much circumstantial. I do want to support her in any trouble, except if she has decided to accept another man. In that case, no more. Sorry, I just am not that liberal.

          I think what you are telling me is that all of the symptoms I tell, can be from something else such as premenopause. Is there anything that you can tell me that would allow me to be relatively certain about that. The other evidences are far beyond doubt. I am grasping at straw to find some other reasons.. so asking this, hear.

          She has many if not all traits of NPD.. so very hard to discuss anything with.

          Thank you for any help.

          Comment

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