whats wrong with me

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whats wrong with me

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  • whats wrong with me

    i dont let any one get close to me. as soon as they get close i push them away especialy boyfriends.

  • Trust issues? Don't punish people in your life for things that others have done. It took me a long time to realize that. I was the same way. I would sabotage any relationship and/or friendship as soon as it was going well. Simply out of fear that they would hurt me. All that fear was either created in my head, or based on a past experience with someone completely unrelated. You'll miss out on a lot of great people in your life if you continue to do this.

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    • Do you have insecurities?

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      • Originally posted by sourpuss View Post
        Trust issues? Don't punish people in your life for things that others have done. It took me a long time to realize that. I was the same way. I would sabotage any relationship and/or friendship as soon as it was going well. Simply out of fear that they would hurt me. All that fear was either created in my head, or based on a past experience with someone completely unrelated. You'll miss out on a lot of great people in your life if you continue to do this.
        it wierd cuz i know im doin it but dont know how to stop. i cant deal with the urge to get away or shut them out? how did u stop doing it? i dont want to be all alone but at the same time thats what im creating.

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        • Originally posted by lizzardb63 View Post
          Do you have insecurities?
          yea i guess.i have my days where i think im fat, but most women do lol. ive always been overweight just the last two years ive reachd a healthy body weight and i exercise regularly now to stay fit.

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          • Originally posted by brebee View Post
            yea i guess.i have my days where i think im fat, but most women do lol. ive always been overweight just the last two years ive reachd a healthy body weight and i exercise regularly now to stay fit.
            You should be really proud of yourself! It's really hard sometimes to reach a goal like that! Sure everyone has their days.... EVERYONE!! I am so happy for you... and I don't even know you! LOL. I just know that when a really good friend of mine achieved the same goal I saw how well they had done and how much effort and disipline it takes. So now every time I hear of someone reaching their goal I get really happy!

            As for the issues that you are dealing with... I have been there myself! I know how hard it is to overcome those issues. I usually start by writing things down... Why you do them? How you feel when when you have pushed someone away? How would that make you you feel? And how do you think you could change it?

            Writing is a great release and I often find it very helpful. Though if you feel that the issue may be larger than pens and paper I would suggest having a look through the forum maybe someone else has been through a similar situation and you could find something there. Reading online there are plenty of places to find things. But if you feel no improvement then you might want to speak to a professional. I had to deal with some trust issues myself.... I have a long line of bad boyfriends and a bunch of other stuff to go along with it. Just keep at it! Like you reached one goal you can totally apply yourself to another!

            Good Luck and keep strong!
            peace, love and cha cha cha!

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            • Have you had any trauma in your past? An abusive childhood? (and abuse takes many forms). I'm no expert, but I listen to Loveline and Dr. Drew always talks about how trauma in our past tends to surface (mostly subconsciously) in our adult lives and sabotage our adult relationships.
              It's awesome that you've taken personal initiative in yourself! Sometimes we just need to focus on our own well-being and other things will fall into place. We can't be happy with anyone if we are not happy with ourselves. This can be hard!
              Maybe try seeing a counselor? Someone that can help pinpoint the exact problem...
              vivre bien

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