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I'm Against Her Breast Reduction

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  • I think the OP just needs to completely honest with his gf about his feelings and why he thinks she should or should not go through with this. If she was a 32A and wanted a boob job many of us would be saying, "no, love who you are" and others would be supporting that she should do it if it will make her happier about herself.

    Ultimately it is her choice. If it is something she really wants, she will find a way to afford it for herself regardless of what anyone else thinks. In the meantime, strengthening her back and abs, improving her posture and doing whatever she can to be more comfortable with this is a good idea.

    If it turns out that her bf is shallow she will have to deal with that and frankly that would be no great loss for her. If it turns out that he isn't shallow, that's great. Either way, given time, it will balance out.

    Comment


    • Originally posted by WildChild View Post
      I think the OP just needs to completely honest with his gf about his feelings and why he thinks she should or should not go through with this. If she was a 32A and wanted a boob job many of us would be saying, "no, love who you are" and others would be supporting that she should do it if it will make her happier about herself.

      Ultimately it is her choice. If it is something she really wants, she will find a way to afford it for herself regardless of what anyone else thinks. In the meantime, strengthening her back and abs, improving her posture and doing whatever she can to be more comfortable with this is a good idea.

      If it turns out that her bf is shallow she will have to deal with that and frankly that would be no great loss for her. If it turns out that he isn't shallow, that's great. Either way, given time, it will balance out.
      If she wasn't getting physical problems or to a lesser degree problems related to the comments of others, I would not think of surgery as a good option. On top of that I think small breasts are beautiful in their own right. So my answer will be asymmetric and not hypocritical. Reduction is sometimes necessary but enhancement rarely is. Now if patients can come up with a better reason for enhancement other than body image I may change my mind. Reconstructive surgery is more understandable, trying to get back to a former body shape.
      I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
      ...
      Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

      From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

      Comment


      • Originally posted by WildChild View Post
        I think the OP just needs to completely honest with his gf about his feelings and why he thinks she should or should not go through with this. If she was a 32A and wanted a boob job many of us would be saying, "no, love who you are" and others would be supporting that she should do it if it will make her happier about herself.

        Ultimately it is her choice. If it is something she really wants, she will find a way to afford it for herself regardless of what anyone else thinks. In the meantime, strengthening her back and abs, improving her posture and doing whatever she can to be more comfortable with this is a good idea.

        If it turns out that her bf is shallow she will have to deal with that and frankly that would be no great loss for her. If it turns out that he isn't shallow, that's great. Either way, given time, it will balance out.
        I agree and I have been honest and have explained all of this to her. Ultimately, it is up to her. The money is NOT a problem. We have that. She is welcomed to that and I welcome helping her through the surgery. In the end, it may be the best thing for her. I have agreed to that since the beginning and still do. All, I will continue to say, regardless of the ridiculous comment I flagged for inappropriate, I don't know if I will feel the same afterward.

        Thanks again all!

        Comment


        • Well, its understood that your feelings may change if her boobs go down a size. But relationships are a two-way street obviously... and perhaps your feelings changing over her boob size will change her feelings for you as well. Hopefully she makes whatever decision is best for her health and happiness -- Good luck to the both of you.
          Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

          Comment


          • In reality we also as individuals have a right to not like something for what ever reason that is.

            In addition, people have hommed in on " I like them the way they are, me"...as your reasoning, however, you have also ensured that you have made it very clear that you will support her, will be there, will help her financially, emotionally you are not sure if she will change, if it will change her, it does change people sometimes when they have an enlargement for instance, more confidence, so you have a right to also worry about that thought pattern.

            You came here advising you are against it.

            You have listed why including the risks, botched jobs, scars, emotional scars as well as a result of those risks...

            What ever we have hommed in on The bottom line is you will take from that what does make sense what is correct and what is not and that is all that counts.

            The fact that you placed this thread in Mental Health means that it does bother you in many ways...

            Best wishes

            CW
            Last edited by CHANDLERS WISH; 04-11-2011, 12:12 AM.
            PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

            Comment


            • Her breasts, her body, her decision.

              I might be more inclined to agree to talking her out of it if were small chested and wanted to get implants, but in her case I think it might actually be a good idea, if it helps alleviate her back problems. Lots of large chested women suffer because the weight of their breasts puts a strain on their body.

              What should matter to you is that they are HER breasts not that they are LARGE breasts. She'd still be the exact same person even if she had A cups. It's not the size that counts, it's the "owner" that matters.

              Comment


              • Originally posted by CHANDLERS WISH View Post
                The fact that you placed this thread in Mental Health means that it does bother you in many ways...

                Best wishes

                CW
                Exactly CW. Thanks for the well wishes and I appreciate wholeheartedly the feedback! Thanks Hopeless Dork as well!

                Comment


                • I apologise if my post seemed ridicules and it was to an extreme in the fact that the photo's posted were to show you that the woman's breasts do change, with age and or weight gain, childbirth.

                  Our Firm, perky, large, medium or small breasts will change in time on their own. Having her have the choice to " alter" them now , to what she feels is a more manageable size is going to giver her relief from future pain or emotional stress and she will most likely have a much higher self esteem with being more comfortable with her own body.

                  Also, Men have Breast Reductions also. especially overweight and large men. They do it for health reasons and some for emotional reasons too.
                  Breast reduction should not be about the looks of a breast. It should be about the Health of the Person with the breasts. Men and Women alike.

                  I doubt that are many people that would lose " feelings" for a man who chose to have his Breasts reduced , because of his back Pain, or the weight on his chest or the Stares of Huge breasts on a Man.

                  Society has deemed Big Breasts on a Woman, to be Sexy and Alluring, but ugly and unattractive on a man. It would be so much better if people would let go of the Physical attributes or the actual breast... And start Looking into what lies beneath the breast .. and Instead look at the Heart of the person.

                  Comment


                  • I think you are being completely selfish! Are you with this woman because you love her or are you with her because of the size of her breasts? Let me ask you a questions... what if she developed breast cancer and had to have one or both breasts removed? Would you still love her? Would you still be with her? What if she had to have a lump removed and even though she didn't lost a breast she was left with a scar? Would that bother you? If you are only with this woman for the size of her breast's I find you to be a superficial pig.
                    She may not have had problems with her back etc... for however many years but after time it does start to wear on your body especially your back compensating for the weight of large breasts, then there's the problem of finding tops to fit properly, or bra's and forget about going braless. I don't see how you can claim to love this woman and be so concerned about her reducing the size of her breasts when NOT reducing them causes her pain that will just get increasingly worse as the years go by. I find your views on this selfish, thoughtless, inconsiderate, and not the reaction of a man that loves the woman he's with.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by JadedQueen View Post
                      I think you are being completely selfish! Are you with this woman because you love her or are you with her because of the size of her breasts? Let me ask you a questions... what if she developed breast cancer and had to have one or both breasts removed? Would you still love her? Would you still be with her? What if she had to have a lump removed and even though she didn't lost a breast she was left with a scar? Would that bother you? If you are only with this woman for the size of her breast's I find you to be a superficial pig.
                      She may not have had problems with her back etc... for however many years but after time it does start to wear on your body especially your back compensating for the weight of large breasts, then there's the problem of finding tops to fit properly, or bra's and forget about going braless. I don't see how you can claim to love this woman and be so concerned about her reducing the size of her breasts when NOT reducing them causes her pain that will just get increasingly worse as the years go by. I find your views on this selfish, thoughtless, inconsiderate, and not the reaction of a man that loves the woman he's with.
                      I very like it and agree for you comment....because at this time of life is as what you say it.

                      Comment

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