orgasm denial

[CHANDLERS WISH]

The case I know of (or actually suspect), the man has no idea that his spouse is feeling abused - she won' tell him. He is an OK guy, but just not very perceptive, and he thinks she is enjoying it as well.

It isn't terrible - but I think she is doing things she doesn't really want.

I think the risk of being tied up by someone you don't know well isn't really all that much worse than just being alone with someone much stronger than you.

Sure, i appreciated that when i read it and understood and i would suspect she is a tad submissive?... However, i also suspect she will get to a point where she will just blurt something out at some stage, as we all do. Depends on the level of independence as i would have no problem saying, that's to rough, or what ever...and what's the point of doing something you are not enjoying on-going? Giving one satisfaction but not equal?

Well yes, most men are stronger than the female without a doubt but most females have nails, at least we can lash out a bit, bite it, only joking...

I just feel that you made a valid point perhaps not your intention but never the less, to women on the Forum who are experimenting a bit, single just started dating and take it for granted " he's a nice guy" not to worry when that may not be the case. So to be a bit more cautious until you've been with him for a while perhaps before being more adventurous plenty of other ways to be adventurous in the meantime, and still have some control, rather than none.

I'm not concerened at this point in time, but if things don't work out, you have me thinking ahead now and nothing wrong with that, really is there....

CW

[rcoreyus]

The case I know of (or actually suspect), the man has no idea that his spouse is feeling abused - she won' tell him. He is an OK guy, but just not very preceptive, and he thinks she is enjoying it as well.

It isn't terrible - but I think she is doing things she doesn't really want.

I think the risk of being tied up by someone you don't know well isn't really all that much worse than just being alone with someone much stronger than you.

Actually, i had a restless night thinking on your thoughts there rcoreyus.

As a single woman. One whom is of the middle age generation almost whom obvious to most, is wanting to experience more of her sexuality.

What concerned me, was a relationship can be entered into sexually after a few dates, but do you really know that person? You may think you feel comforable after a few weeks to "try" various simple things such as my thoughts originally on "scarfs" being tied up, blindfolded but truth be known, your vulnerable aren't you? He could be anyone, couldn't he?

I appreciate that this would be slightly unlikely as we follow intuition however, point being you are right, in as much as you must be careful that you understand what you are doing, whom you are with and that you know that person quite well before entering that arena, as further more, their actions the second, third time may drift into a different sphere one that leaves you scared after perhaps...

You can bet what ever you think is unlikely has the opportunity on the same accord to be to "someone" likely...

Guess those little things can wait then.....

PS: ANON, thought about that pole thing to, mmmm.... would get in your way abit, harder to position to suit her i think, and, well i still like the more seductive version kind of has it's own feel about it.

But interesting thought.


CW

[CHANDLERS WISH]

You can bet what ever you think is unlikely has the opportunity on the same accord to be "somewhat" likely...

Sorry regarding the above paragraph...

CW

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Just a comment: along with a safe word - or a safe "action" if you use gags, be sure you have a way to untie the person quickly. Scissors nearby are a good idea. Also it is good if the bottom can get loose themselves if they REALLY need to. The top could have a medical problem.

Also - be careful - bondage can drift into abuse, where the bottom starts to feel that they need to do this. I know this isn't a politically correct view of BDSM, but I know of one couple where I'm pretty sure this has happened. The woman started out interested in bondage games, but I think (not sure), is not just doing it to please here husband, and isn't enjoying it any more.

Actually, i had a restless night thinking on your thoughts there rcoreyus.

As a single woman. One whom is of the middle age generation almost whom obvious to most, is wanting to experience more of her sexuality.

What concerned me, was a relationship can be entered into sexually after a few dates, but do you really know that person? You may think you feel comforable after a few weeks to "try" various simple things such as my thoughts originally on "scarfs" being tied up, blindfolded but truth be known, your vulnerable aren't you? He could be anyone, couldn't he?

I appreciate that this would be slightly unlikely as we follow intuition however, point being you are right, in as much as you must be careful that you understand what you are doing, whom you are with and that you know that person quite well before entering that arena, as further more, their actions the second, third time may drift into a different sphere one that leaves you scared after perhaps...

You can bet what ever you think is unlikely has the opportunity on the same accord to be to "someone" likely...

Guess those little things can wait then.....

PS: ANON, thought about that pole thing to, mmmm.... would get in your way abit, harder to position to suit her i think, and, well i still like the more seductive version kind of has it's own feel about it.

But interesting thought.


CW

[rcoreyus]

Just a comment: along with a safe word - or a safe "action" if you use gags, be sure you have a way to untie the person quickly. Scissors nearby are a good idea. Also it is good if the bottom can get loose themselves if they REALLY need to. The top could have a medical problem.

Also - be careful - bondage can drift into abuse, where the bottom starts to feel that they need to do this. I know this isn't a politically correct view of BDSM, but I know of one couple where I'm pretty sure this has happened. The woman started out interested in bondage games, but I think (not sure), is not just doing it to please here husband, and isn't enjoying it any more.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Well, it depends on what you're trying to achieve. I'm fine with whatever, so was my ex. If comfort is your priority then it's easy enough to find 4 or more fabric belts/scarfs.

And it's probably best to rip off duck tape hard and fast, than slow and gently. Oh, I would recommend getting a stick of some sort, and taping on two scarfs, one at each end, so you can seperate the legs and tie them open...

Bad diagram follows

__V_________V__

__0_________0__

If this was a battle, i would be defeated, lol... Why? Because where i think of one thing, you create that different thought, then i have to think yet again.... Perhaps, that's due to having the flu? Do you think?

Okay, again fair call.... And what was i thinking, we've all had some form of bondage, i mean bandage so consequently, absolutely, why rip that of gently....

Some things are best left unsaid.....

Now, as for teaching an older person, congratulations, in all honestly, to think i never thought of the poll as well? I guess a Queen Size bed, is well, to wide after all...

Thanks for that thought....

Gee...... i think you just started another thread, if read here.... or many a post...



CW

[anonymouswhitefemale]

Well, it depends on what you're trying to achieve. I'm fine with whatever, so was my ex. If comfort is your priority then it's easy enough to find 4 or more fabric belts/scarfs.

And it's probably best to rip off duck tape hard and fast, than slow and gently. Oh, I would recommend getting a stick of some sort, and taping on two scarfs, one at each end, so you can seperate the legs and tie them open...

Bad diagram follows

__V_________V__

__0_________0__

[CHANDLERS WISH]

How many men do you think have a roll of duck tape? Or a rope? How many belts can you get your hands on? There's more than enough ways to completely imobilize someone, especially to a man of ingenuity .

Well yes, see, my immediate thought as a lady was the man, wanting his pleasure however, in my comfort? So, i was thinking of my Silk, soft....

Off course, i can see your point, however, whom were you thinking of?

Then now that you have planted an alternative thought into my mind, than what i was thinking, if you guys were gentleman, in those instances, you would ensure looseness, and pulling of, etc, very gently, then i guess that would fall then, wouldn't it, into the same category?

CW

[anonymouswhitefemale]

But, how many scarfes do you honestly think, a woman keeps in her bedroom?

I mean they went out along time ago, ANON?

How many men do you think have a roll of duck tape? Or a rope? How many belts can you get your hands on? There's more than enough ways to completely imobilize someone, especially to a man of ingenuity .

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I am sure i'm not allowing Catherine to answer here, to both.....

But, well, it's early there?

But, how many scarfes do you honestly think, a woman keeps in her bedroom?

I mean they went out along time ago, ANON?



CW