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Is it weird that I'm addicted to giving BJs?

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  • I don't think it's weird to be into any form of sexual activity as long as everyone involved consents to it (I say that as someone who's into kinky stuff that looks bad if you don't have any context for what we're doing, lol). I think what's most important is recognizing that in the past you performed oral sex for reasons that had little (or nothing) to do with pleasure -- like wanting to be liked -- but that you also recognize other reasons for why you enjoy it now.

    Personally, I've gone through different phases with my enjoyment of all kinds of sex, including oral. When I was young, I gave blowjobs because I wanted the guy to like me. As I got older, I found I wanted to do it less often with partners who (ultimately, as I would figure out) were people I didn't want to be with. In my current relationship, I've had moments of loving blowjobs (especially as part of our dominance and submission relationship because I feel both powerful and submissive) but also of not wanting to do it at all (I blame lack of libido.)

    I don't think we always have to know why we like what we like, nor does it have to fit in with the stereotype of what we think others enjoy. Sure, it might be common for women not to like giving blowjobs but that's not universal -- and there are SO many reasons why people don't like providing oral that are much more complicated than we realize.

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    • MoJoo thank you for sharing your experience with addiction. I can't even imagine the emotional and mental toll that must have taken on you but your ability to be so self aware about it is admirable. If you don't mind my asking, in what ways did the rehab center help you? Were they focused on the sex addition/act specifically or mainly the mental/emotional aspect?

      And how is your sex life now? Do you avoid performing oral altogether or are there specific methods/approaches you use to prepare for when you are comfortable enough to do so?

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      • Totally not weird!! For me I've found that when I'm close to someone or feel very comfortable having sex with them, that's when I most like giving a blowjob. When I'm hooking up with someone I don't know that well I kind of find myself going through the motions of a blowjob but my heart isn't really in it. More like just to be polite lol. Once I'm close with someone, part of the thrill of giving head is it's almost like sensual kissing versus doing a chore when I'm not that into it. But I know tons of people that love blowjobs too!

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        • I’ve had several long term relationships where my partner enjoyed fellatio almost to the point of wanting to do nothing else. For me it’s a perfectly legitimate way to enjoy each other as long as it’s not coerced or expected. There’s an immense amount of pleasure to be had in the act of giving or receiving oral sex. There’s just so much to explore and so many ways to bring your partner to climax. In the same vein I love going down on my wife and can spend a lot of time down there bringing her to a crashing finish. Just go with it and enjoy yourselves would be my thought.

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          • The point about power and control during oral sex is that it can be handed back and forth between the partners too during the act. Sometimes it can be fun to exert a little dominance over my partner with light thrusting. As long as she is comfortable of course. On the more advanced scale, one partner in particular enjoyed being dominated a little more aggressively. So I would grab and hair, pull her mouth onto me, and would thrust a bit more deeply. That was fun for us both. I guess my point being that fellatio can be a full act in itself that’s satisfying for both in different ways.

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            • I don't know if I would say I'm addicted to giving my boyfriend BJ's but I definitely enjoy it because I know he enjoys it so much. That's usually the 1st sexual activity we do.

              As for swallowing I do it too. I did it the first time & I totally shocked my boyfriend. He kept saying I can't believe you swallowed lol now I do it everytime. He is the first guy I've let cum in my mouth. In the past I always thought I wouldn't like the taste so I never let any guy cum in my mouth but I actually do like the taste..
              Last edited by Terra84; 07-16-2022, 10:53 AM.

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              • In my younger days, I did a few bjs but was not really into doing them. Now I am 44, and suddenly I also seem addicted and want to give my husband one almost every night. Not sure what changed, but it did.

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