Women's Health Interactive Forums

  • Before signing up for our forum please read our rules.

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Strange behaviour?

Collapse
X
Collapse
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Strange behaviour?

    Hi all and I hope this finds you all well. I'm an elderly guy, very happily married for over 50 years. Our sex life has been great but I have alwaws had a fascination with masturbation. Many years ago I bought my wife a (very early model) vibrator so that she could 'finish' after our lovemaking. It worked a treat and she adapted to it like a duck to water.

    There came a time in our life though when I needed to work late into the night to get things done for our new business and my wife would go to bed much earlier. I guess we were in our late 30's at the time and our sex life was confined to early mornings, to the disapproval of my wife.

    One night, about 20 mins after she went to bed I went up the hallway to ask her a question before she went to sleep. The bedroom door was open about 6 inches and as I was about to speak I heard the distinctive sound of the vibrator being pressed against her body (it was quite loud compared to modern ones). I was shocked at first but as I listened to it whirring away, and the wonderful sounds she was quietly making, I became very horny.

    I couldn't help myself and began masturbating outside of our bedroom door in the dark. It was a tad risky because our two daughters were asleep in the bedroom opposite. The fact was though, I found the experience one of the most erotic I have ever known, so much so that I repeated the exercise quite often, whenever I could. I'm sure she had no idea that I was listening in and masturbating with her just outside her door. I felt quite guilty at times for, I don't know, breaching her trust or something but I felt compelled to continue because it was so rewarding sensually.

    Obviously I stopped doing it once the workload dropped off but now, many years later, maybe 6-8 months ago I was watching the footy and went to the bedroom door to ask if the sound was bothering her. To my surprise she was masturbating on the bed with the bedside light on and as happened years before I couldn't help myself and masturbated while watching.

    About 2 months ago, after we had sex one morning (mutual masturbation) I told her about what had happened both years ago and more recently and how much I loved the experience. Unfortunately she didn't take it at all well. I was shocked at her response because should the roles have reversed, I'm certain that I'd have found it both highly erotic and flattering. The reality is that now she is refusing my approaches for lovemaking. I have no idea what to do next and we are at an age where time is pretty important. Any ideas? Thanks.

  • Hi there and welcome.

    to get right to your question, I suggest you begin by apologizing. Then recognize that you encroached on something your wife believed was private. How you think you’d feel if the roles were reversed isn’t relevant to how she feels about what happened.

    I can fully understand how your actions could be seen as an intrusive violation of trust. Now that it’s happened, you’ll need to earn her trust back. Hopefully she’s willing to guide you on the best way to do that. As you said, time is of the essence. So don’t wait.

    Comment


    • Originally posted by Wednesday L.F. View Post
      Hi there and welcome.

      to get right to your question, I suggest you begin by apologizing. Then recognize that you encroached on something your wife believed was private. How you think you’d feel if the roles were reversed isn’t relevant to how she feels about what happened.

      I can fully understand how your actions could be seen as an intrusive violation of trust. Now that it’s happened, you’ll need to earn her trust back. Hopefully she’s willing to guide you on the best way to do that. As you said, time is of the essence. So don’t wait.
      Yes you're right. I will do that ASAP at the right moment. I understand that what I may feel isn't relevant but the fact is I think I'd be chuffed. Thank you for your thoughtful reply.

      Comment


      • I think you did your equivalent of voyeurism with your ears. It excited you to hear her build up to an orgasm. I also think that you did not bring it up before because you knew it could possibly cause a problem. That is why I wonder why you brought it up now. Now your wife is going to be wondering if you are lurking outside of the door. Maybe you should take to finding something away from the house to do if you don't already have such occasions. Give your wife time to be just with herself and her thoughts.
        I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
        ...
        Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

        From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

        Comment


        • Originally posted by jns View Post
          I think you did your equivalent of voyeurism with your ears. It excited you to hear her build up to an orgasm. I also think that you did not bring it up before because you knew it could possibly cause a problem. That is why I wonder why you brought it up now. Now your wife is going to be wondering if you are lurking outside of the door. Maybe you should take to finding something away from the house to do if you don't already have such occasions. Give your wife time to be just with herself and her thoughts.
          Thanks. My telling her about it was after what was en enjoyable 'session'. Somehow (quite mistakenly it seems) I thought she would see the erotic side. As mentioned, should the situation have been reversed, I would have been thrilled that she found my masturbation a turn-on. I guess that's the big lesson in this, women and men see things differently (at least in our case).

          Comment

          or

          Womens Health orange logoGet The Newsletter

          Receive our passionately crafted, medically reviewed articles and insights — the stuff nobody else talks about but you want to know — delivered right to your inbox.

          Latest Activity On Our Forums

          Collapse

          Latest Topics On Our Forums

          Collapse

          Working...
          X