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Married ladies, any advice?

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  • Married ladies, any advice?

    Im worried Im not handling my sex life well at the moment. A little quick background.. Been married almost 5 years and have 3 children, and I have what most would probably consider a unique married. Its not submissive technically, but basically that is the case. I grew up with clear expectations for what a wife's role is, and I truly feel most comfortable in a marriage this way. I am SAHM, and my husband does pretty well for us. Other than our children, we don't have a lot of burdens on our plate so to speak. That being said, the expectation of me by my husband is pretty clear, other than taking care of our children during the day, my "job" is to take care of myself physically, and to be prepared for sex, of any kind, virtually 24/7. I know, this all sounds crazy and maybe it is to some, but Im happy! I give my husband oral sex every morning. At 7pm every single night, on the dot like clockwork, I wait for my husband in our bedroom with the door closed, naked and holding my ankles. Its not that were into anything "that" kinky, Id say no more so than any couple, its just that for my husband its to be able to have whatever he wants sexually, whenever he wants. So at 7pm I am prepared for intercourse, no matter what.

    My question/need for advice surrounds a recent trend. Recently after healing up from the birth of our 3rd and FINAL child, my husband explained to me that moving forward Sundays would be reserved for sex, period. Our nanny takes the kids at 7am to the theme park, and doesn't return until usually after 9pm. Before the first Sunday, it had been explained to me to be ready for a lot of sex. I knew going in my husband's refractory period is super short, 15 mins, 20 tops. But I wasn't prepared for how the past few weeks have been. We usually have 30-45 mins of vaginal sex before his first ejaculation, and then after 15 mins or so rest, begin 30-45 mins of anal sex. I usually politely beg and ask if I can provide oral for the third time, and if Im careful, I can make this take 30-45 mins as well. But by the afternoon, we've done this cycle 8-9 times. I've had 4+ hours of vaginal sex, 4+ hours of anal sex, and my throat is usually sore from 8-9 blowjobs (he's "above average"). Dont get me wrong, this can be amazing. The arousal I get mentally from knowing Im able to do this for him can at times gives me amazingggg orgasms, but by 4-5 o'clock my body cant take it anymore. My vagina will begin to bleed, and my anus is flat out too sore for more. At this point he will usually finish the final 4-5 hours ejaculating by thrusting between my breasts, thighs, or via blowjob or handjob.

    My concern is, I can tell this may be temporary. I am pretty sure the expectation is that within a week or two, I am ready to continue vaginal and anal intercourse until the end of the night, with only breast or manual stimulation as a break in between, not as a way of satisfying him for the last third of the evening. Does anyone have any advice for how to get my body prepared for this? Any suggestion at all would be helpful. And if not, maybe other ideas of how to bring him to orgasm beyond the methods I mentioned, as that might help me space it all out? AS mentioned above, our married is entirely submission based, so it has been known since we got married that spanking and other forms of punishment were and are on the table if something major like this cant be taken care of. I've never messed up that bad, but I dont want to start now!

    Thanks for any advice, stories, anything
    Cheers

  • #2
    You say you are fine with it, for the most part. Lucky, I guess.

    You asked married women for advice. I am a guy and cannot help in that regard. But, as a guy I find myself a bit appalled by your husband's expectations of you. It does not sound at all solicitous, respectful or loving. It sounds more like abuse than anything else. Borderline torture.

    I hope the women here will offer something constructive. They tend to be a helpful lot.

    Good luck.
    I do not grow old; if I stop growing, I am old.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by jess3186 View Post
      Im worried Im not handling my sex life well at the moment. A little quick background.. Been married almost 5 years and have 3 children, and I have what most would probably consider a unique married. Its not submissive technically, but basically that is the case. I grew up with clear expectations for what a wife's role is, and I truly feel most comfortable in a marriage this way. I am SAHM, and my husband does pretty well for us. Other than our children, we don't have a lot of burdens on our plate so to speak. That being said, the expectation of me by my husband is pretty clear, other than taking care of our children during the day, my "job" is to take care of myself physically, and to be prepared for sex, of any kind, virtually 24/7. I know, this all sounds crazy and maybe it is to some, but Im happy! I give my husband oral sex every morning. At 7pm every single night, on the dot like clockwork, I wait for my husband in our bedroom with the door closed, naked and holding my ankles. Its not that were into anything "that" kinky, Id say no more so than any couple, its just that for my husband its to be able to have whatever he wants sexually, whenever he wants. So at 7pm I am prepared for intercourse, no matter what.

      My question/need for advice surrounds a recent trend. Recently after healing up from the birth of our 3rd and FINAL child, my husband explained to me that moving forward Sundays would be reserved for sex, period. Our nanny takes the kids at 7am to the theme park, and doesn't return until usually after 9pm. Before the first Sunday, it had been explained to me to be ready for a lot of sex. I knew going in my husband's refractory period is super short, 15 mins, 20 tops. But I wasn't prepared for how the past few weeks have been. We usually have 30-45 mins of vaginal sex before his first ejaculation, and then after 15 mins or so rest, begin 30-45 mins of anal sex. I usually politely beg and ask if I can provide oral for the third time, and if Im careful, I can make this take 30-45 mins as well. But by the afternoon, we've done this cycle 8-9 times. I've had 4+ hours of vaginal sex, 4+ hours of anal sex, and my throat is usually sore from 8-9 blowjobs (he's "above average"). Dont get me wrong, this can be amazing. The arousal I get mentally from knowing Im able to do this for him can at times gives me amazingggg orgasms, but by 4-5 o'clock my body cant take it anymore. My vagina will begin to bleed, and my anus is flat out too sore for more. At this point he will usually finish the final 4-5 hours ejaculating by thrusting between my breasts, thighs, or via blowjob or handjob.

      My concern is, I can tell this may be temporary. I am pretty sure the expectation is that within a week or two, I am ready to continue vaginal and anal intercourse until the end of the night, with only breast or manual stimulation as a break in between, not as a way of satisfying him for the last third of the evening. Does anyone have any advice for how to get my body prepared for this? Any suggestion at all would be helpful. And if not, maybe other ideas of how to bring him to orgasm beyond the methods I mentioned, as that might help me space it all out? AS mentioned above, our married is entirely submission based, so it has been known since we got married that spanking and other forms of punishment were and are on the table if something major like this cant be taken care of. I've never messed up that bad, but I dont want to start now!

      Thanks for any advice, stories, anything
      Cheers
      A sex marathon like this may be fun once as long as the partner is willing, but to have it as a regular occurrence seems a bit much. The idea of sex is not to pulverize your partner. Was he doing this with other women before marriage or is it something he came up with just for you?
      I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
      ...
      Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

      From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

      Comment


      • #4
        what's your secret for getting 3 young children to bed every night by 7 pm?
        unless the nanny is there every night?

        your children must be angelic to be in bed by 7 nightly (except Sunday) and sleep past 7 every morning

        your kid's schedule fascinates me as I never remember our child ever going to bed that early
        in the summer around here, people have their kids out and about well past 7

        Comment


        • #5
          I don't know anything about sex. But that sounds ridiculous to me.

          Comment


          • #6
            I don't know what advice can be given here. I'm assuming lube is already in use. Our bodies have limits, and all of us need time for healing and recuperation. There's really no way around that. It could be that over time, your openings will become accustomed to the activity and be more resilient, I don't know. That's a lot of pounding.

            Can you go a couple rounds with other types of toys, hands, etc? Is any of that acceptable for him?

            I can support your lifestyle and that you're a willing participant, but for your health and well being, it seems some boundaries could be drawn. If you're bleeding, it's time to stop. Your body is telling you "enough", and it's wise to listen to it.
            Even after the marathon on Sunday, you're back at it again on Monday.
            I think anyone, regardless the nature of your marital arrangements, could be agreeable to that. If not, then I'd have to believe the relationship had crossed that boundary into abuse.

            Comment


            • #7
              I'd almost guess this is someone's idea of a prank on WH...

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Texasred View Post
                I'd almost guess this is someone's idea of a prank on WH...
                It does seem a bit fantastic.
                I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
                ...
                Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

                From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Texasred View Post
                  I'd almost guess this is someone's idea of a prank on WH...
                  either that or we've met Superman and Superwoman

                  cause anyone who can take care of three kids all day and husband each night and morn is superwoman
                  especially 3 young children....... 3 kids in 5 yrs....wow

                  still don't get how you do it all Jess!
                  and how your kids go to bed so early when kids nap in afternoon.....my sister couldn't even get her child to sleep until 11 pm because of a late nap time

                  our child napped in afternoon too and no way would go to sleep by 7 pm


                  Comment


                  • #10
                    [LEFT][COLOR=#333333][FONT=Georgia][SIZE=16px]As a marriage mediator, I often hear women's stories about how they're struggling to stay afloat in their marriages. One woman described her decade-long marriage to me, and I immediately saw her courage and bravery in seeking help. She could have walked away from the marriage, but she didn't. She loved her husband but was unhappy and overwhelmed. for more information please visit this site
                    Link removed
                    Last edited by atskitty2; 03-04-2018, 02:47 PM.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      And I thought my ex-g/f was a porn star!!!

                      I tend to doubt a dude who's of the age of the dude in the OP's post could get off that many times in one day. Heck, I'd doubt that a 19 year old kid could. I'm trying to remember what I did at 19, but I'd doubt I did it more than 5 times in an entire day.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Aaaaand.... the OP hasn't returned.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Of course not, it's Sunday...probably 'busy'!
                          You are worthy!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            My only comment is "a blow job following anal sex?????" you've got to be kidding.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Thanks everyone for the thoughts and advise! Sorry late on responding. I hear a lot of concerns, and I think the way I explained it is tough to understand, I totally get that. The most simple summary I can think of is: we approach sex very uniquely. My husband expects it A LOT, and our "thing" I guess you could say, is that I submit to that. Its intense, but I am into it. Sometimes that means being uncomfortable, or doing things I would rather not do, but I don't think I would be personally or sexually satisfied if it didn't work that way. I can't explain it, but I just fundamentally want to submit. I am that way in general, but in terms of my marriage above all, everything in my personality and who I am desires that. My husband happens to be the complete opposite, and I think clearly neither of us would be compatible with virtually any other partner. I'm sure that reads like Fifty Shades, and its like that to an extent I suppose, but its not whips and chains and red velvet rooms... its just complete sexual submission. 24/7, 365, no questions.

                              If that doesn't help explain any better, I'd be glad to hear thoughts and questions and try to answer them. I think that would honestly help me at this point!

                              That all being said, an update. Last Sunday was... better. My husband is obviously the most intense and aroused when the day begins. I decided this would actually be the best time for me to try to steer things versus the end when I think he's thinking more than just "doing". I was able to start things by trying to basically put his penis everywhere on me possible. Not gonna lie, I have great breasts . So I asked him to make love to them first, and later suggested he thrust on top of each of them to come in my mouth. Long story short, he came several times before any penetration occurred. An added benefit I found to this is that his "maybe too large" member comes closer to just large later in the day lol.

                              I think he was a little worked up having not been inside me that entire time, so when he did decide to go inside of me he made it clear we were going to work lol. Sometimes he likes to tie me in different ways or positions, so he tied my hands to my ankles, and laid me face down on the bed. He then made love to me vaginally realllly hard, but each session was markedly shorter than usual. I found I wasn't getting sore nearly at all. Other than us both being simply physically tired, I was feeling pretty good to go at the end. We finished with anal, which I love (for a while). I think anal was a great way to finish because he tends to not want to "pound" during anal, he prefers me lying flat on my stomach with my legs together, and slowly thrusting deeply for 30-40 mins. So long story short, some of your ideas seem to be working. I will update again after this weekend as talking this all out is helping a lot! Sorry to anyone who isn't interested :/

                              p.s. to answer a couple questions :
                              **On Sundays our Nanny is out of the house with the kids the entire day and evening. She takes our kids to our condo near the Park when they aren't doing any activities, and they all sleep there. And yes, I have to "do" it all again Monday morning, but I love giving my husband a blowjob. Waking up Monday and getting on my knees to see him explode with pleasure isn't really that bad of a Monday when you consider, ?
                              **Yes I give him oral after anal, but there is 'cleaning' involved ! And Ive heard of people who do that without cleaning up first, so I think thats pretty low on our crazy list lol.

                              **And lastly, yes my husband is crazy to be able to come several times and hour for a whole day. That's why Im here talking about this!!

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