[sandman24]

Hello ladies,

I was reading over this thread & since it relates so closely to what I'm dealing W/ I thought I would ask yall a few questions. Hope lists are ok:

1. I've experienced that if someone lies about small, seemingly irrelevant things, they will do the same w: bigger more important issues. Do yall agree?

2. I have never been an overly jealous person (I'm jealous if given reason to b), but b'c I have caught her lying to me b4 it makes me wonder what else she has lied about which makes me wanna play detective to avoid being played for a fool. I know that if I can't trust her I don't want her, but other than a couple times that I actually caught her, my distrust is based on speculation. Normally if I follow my gut I'm right, but I'd hate to think I'm just being paranoid. What do yall think? Here are some examples:

1. when we 1st met she was hanging out w: a tall good looking guy we worked w, who she swears has never been anything but a friend bc he brags about being a player & picks on her like a brother. That was fine when we were just "friends w: benefits", but once we became exclusive she went to lunch w: him b'c "her brothers liked hanging out w: him". & one night she invited him over to smoke w; us...he stayed & stayed, & b'c I had to get up very early the nxt day & I wanted him to go home I said I was going to bed. I fell asleep waiting on him to leave & I woke up & she was gone. I found them at his place & she said he locked himself out & needed her help getting in. Yeah right, a guy asks a girl for b&e help rather than waking me up; would u buy this? Another time, me & her were arguing b'c I was busy & didn't come straight over, so she said fine I'm gonna pass out. When I got there, I went in w knocking & she flipped me off w looking, which she never does. I didn't think anything of it until ol' boy came in w knocking right after me. I think she was trying to show me that if I didn't do exactly what she wanted she would do this.

A couple others include when we agreed to stop smoking green, and she was slipping around & doing it w me & swore on her daddy's grave she didn't. I didn't care that she did it but rather that she lies about it.

Finally, when we first started talking she told me(I didn't ask or tell her anything) that she had been w: 12 ppl. I don't like talking about ex's so we didn't talk about it for around a year, when one night she brought it up again & told me she had only been W/ eight ppl. I didn't even care enough to ask, but now that she lied I'm curious to know the truth. Is that wrong? I have noticed that "birds of a feather flock together" & she told me about her ****ty sorority sisters & roommates that used to get. Passed around like a peace pipe, & how they would go out every night, bring home guys but hers would sleep on the couch or have a threesome w: her roommate. I'm calling bs, do u agree?

I've since noticed that she lies to her mom when she don't wanna get griped , her bros. When we don't wanna hang out w: em, and to everyone else about seemingly insignificant things. I think its a naïve thought to think she doesn't lie to me too. Also, she is always questioning me which makes me think "a thief thinks everyone steals" & she is projecting her actions on me.

Am I being crazy??? If so explain, if not what should I do???

Ps. She has been traveling a lot with work & this makes me nervous...

Thanks in advance

Sandman

[LanaBear]

I moved your post to its own thread, the other one was old.

There just seems to be so much drama to this relationship, I've got to ask, why do you stay? Are you REALLY happy? Can you picture being with this person in the long run? Are you looking for more than she wants to give?

I hope there are a lot of positives in this relationship. With the lies, the put downs, the drama, the lack of trust, what is in this relationship for YOU?

[SaharaJim]

Sooo....she lies to everyone else she knows, hangs out with sexually promiscuous sorority sisters and accuses you of lying and cheating. I am reminded of the old story of the himilayan man and the snake. He is crossing the mountains and finds a snake freezing to death in the snow. he picks the snake up and at it's begging request places it inside his shirt as he climbs the mountain. The man's body heat revives the snake and it bites him. He falls dying as he speaks. He asks the snake "Why did you bite me- now we will both die?" The snake replies "You knew what I was when you picked me up- a snake". Sound familiar?