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  • layla_
    Junior Member
    • Jul 2012
    • 7

    BICURIOUS?

    Im a 16 yr girl
    and my whole life i been helping people with life or love situations. (i love helping people!!! )
    i always hung out with guys and never girls because of drama that i been through
    and during those years of hanging out with guys i didnt know if i should like girls
    or if i should like guys
    WHEN I WAS 13 I GAVE "HANGING AROUND GIRLS FOR A CHANCE"
    until i turned 14 my friends would say i'm
    BICURIOUS (which means: "DONT KNOW WHICH SEX TO LIKE FEMALE OR MALE"
    I have alot in common with guys and with girls too but i was
    never really in a relationship ( 16 years without holding hands with that someone)
    i always had crushes but they didnt like me back
    (they always went for the girls who wore mini
    skirts or a shirt that always shows their boob's)
    and i nevered really had a crush on a girl but
    i had ALOT OF FEELINGS FOR ONE but she was into guys....
    I MAKE ALOT OF FRIENDS AND SOME OF THEM GET
    CLOSE TO ME LIKE BEING MY BROTHER OR MY SISTER..
    and i just want to know (YOU GUYS IF I AM BICURIOUS OR NOT)
  • DreamP346
    • Oct 2011
    • 2053

    There is nothing here that you have writen that says you are bicurious. Not saying you aren't, but nothing you have writen to say you are. People don't ackknowledge this, but attraction is on a scale. Some people are strictly attracted to their own gender, others only to their opposite. But most people lie somewhere in between with different levels of attractions. We just don't give into it because we are taugh as a society not to desire your own gender. People take their entire lives to figure out that they want/are attracted to. Don't go crazy trying to label yourself. When you meet somebody you are attracted to, then just go for it.
    Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose - Kris Kristofferson and Fred Foster (sung by Janis Joplin)

    Comment

    • Hugo-B
      Veteran Member
      • Jun 2012
      • 957

      I think you're just confused at the moment, which is COMPLETELY normal for a 16 year old. I am right in thinking the crushes you had were on boys? You said they went for the ones in mini-skirts so I'm guessing you mean boys. Being 16 and not having kissed anyone is also perfectly normal, I'd only kissed a handful of girls when I got my first GF at 19.

      Unfortunately, it is also perfectly normal for your friends - the people most likely to make hurtful comments - to make thoughtless and ridiculous remarks like "you're bi-curious for hanging out with girls", it is also (un fortunately) normal for someone young and impressionable (no-offense) to worry whether or not these comments are true.

      The fact of the matter is there is nothing wrong with you whether you're gay, straight, or bi. I'll bet you're straight (at least for now!) based on these crushes on boys, just don't be afraid to act on them when you next meet a boy you like, we don't all like mini-skirts and cleavage, I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. Never be scared to take the lead when you meet a boy you fancy, other girls will try and make hurtful comments to put you off so they can try and get their own hands on them.

      Good luck x
      "The greatest enemy will hide in the last place you will ever look" Julius Caesar

      Comment

      • TeenageDream
        Member
        • Apr 2011
        • 19

        I dont see bicurious anywhere in what you wrote. I didnt get a real first kiss until 3 months before my Senior year of high school ended, so dont feel left out. And maybe the guys you like just consider you "one of the guys" or something. Dont feel down about that, because there are TONS of guys in this world.
        When I was in HS, I always tried to make myself look "socially acceptable" to guys. I always had my hair straight, I wore tight jeans and shirts that let my clevage show, the whole 9 yards. And you know what that got me? Nothing. Seriously. I never had a real HS boyfriend. So finally by senior year, I gave up. I wore sweats when I wanted and looked gorgeous when I wanted. I ate what I wanted at lunch and wore hoodies. And suddenly, guys talked to me more because I wasnt trying so hard. Hense my first kiss (total movie kiss too; pushed against a locker and kissing the guy I was crushing on hardcore).
        I learned, things fall into place when you arent even looking. So just be yourself. If that means you are bicurious, be bicurious. If that means your straight, be straight. Whatever it is, just be happy you were yourself in HS and not trying to please others.
        Good luck with everything and if you ever need to talk, message me

        Comment

        • DSemcho
          Senior Member
          • Sep 2011
          • 177

          Bicurious doesn't mean you don't know which sex to like. It just means that your curious about the same gender but have never done anything with them. The only thing that could even be considered a bicurious thought is that you had feelings for a girl - but you didn't act on them. I am actually a bisexual - had my first experience with a girl at 10 (before my first experience with a guy), and I didn't have a name for it until I was 14 and met my sister for the first time (who also happened to be bisexual and is now a lesbian). I've always had an appreciation for the female body, as well as a male body, and I would enjoy being with either in the bedroom - that's how I know I like both. As for the never having held hands with a guy, I waited until I was 18 to do ANYTHING (even kiss) with a guy because I always knew I'd be a very sexual person and I didn't want to risk a teen pregnancy. If you do decide you like both please don't be harsh on yourself about it - there is nothing wrong with it. And most of the time friends will be more supportive than some of your family. My sisters were the first family members I told, then my grandma. My mom found out last and when she did she stopped talking to me for a week because of it. But now everything is fine between us.

          Comment

          • Phish
            Junior Member
            • Aug 2012
            • 1

            We are not what we do but who we are

            Originally posted by DSemcho
            Bicurious doesn't mean you don't know which sex to like. It just means that your curious about the same gender but have never done anything with them. The only thing that could even be considered a bicurious thought is that you had feelings for a girl - but you didn't act on them. I am actually a bisexual - had my first experience with a girl at 10 (before my first experience with a guy), and I didn't have a name for it until I was 14 and met my sister for the first time (who also happened to be bisexual and is now a lesbian). I've always had an appreciation for the female body, as well as a male body, and I would enjoy being with either in the bedroom - that's how I know I like both. As for the never having held hands with a guy, I waited until I was 18 to do ANYTHING (even kiss) with a guy because I always knew I'd be a very sexual person and I didn't want to risk a teen pregnancy. If you do decide you like both please don't be harsh on yourself about it - there is nothing wrong with it. And most of the time friends will be more supportive than some of your family. My sisters were the first family members I told, then my grandma. My mom found out last and when she did she stopped talking to me for a week because of it. But now everything is fine between us.

            Keep moving forward my friend. Take relationships, sex, and friendships slowly. Time is on your
            side at this point so don't be in a hurry to try and figure yourself out by tomorrow. If if you
            were, you couldn't. Sexuality is a type of slavery when you strip the freedom of choice from
            the equation. Always remember you have the choice in who it is you intend to love... and then go with it!

            Comment

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