[h3artbrok3npnay79]

My ex-husband cheated on me after we celebrated our 4 years being married. He met the woman from his job. After gathering evidence like cellphone bills, yahoo history chat and some nasty sexual text messages. I decided to give my husband an ultimatum. I was so mad at him because I almost died giving birth to our second daughter. I was hurt and confused why he was willing to throw away our marriage and our family. He never admitted anything and we constantly argue a lot that comes to the point that we say hurtful words and we no longer respect each other. I decided to file for divorced and on January 10, 2011 our divorce was finalized. We maintain being friends for the sake of our two girls and after being away from each other for almost two years. My ex-husband decided to return to Texas so that he can be there for our girls and try to woe me back. We end up dating and decided to give our love another shot. On December 25, 2012 my ex-husband proposed to me and I accepted his proposal. I thought that our relationship would be much stronger since we already face the difficult ordeal in our lives. My ex-husband/ fiancée decided to go for a cruise for 5 days together with his friends and there he met the other woman. He said that he doesn't want to be the third wheeler so he post something to a cruise forum about if somebody is interested to hang out with him. He never had an intention to cheat or look for another woman but one thing led to another. Flew to California to be with her after the cruise and called me to let me know that he was with another woman. I was deeply hurt, broken and wanted to die...I felt betrayed and after what I have done to give my girls a complete family. He still decided to be in a relationship with another woman while apologizing to me and telling me that he loves me and that he messed up big time. Now, he is here in Texas and told me that he doesn't want me to be out in his life. What should I do? I still love him, but every time I see his face. I can't stop thinking about all the things that he had done to me and how he took my love for granted.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Hi and welcome to WH.

I think that it is sad that you gave him another chance, but worse, that he proposed to you and gave you so much hope for a better future with the man you swore for ever over, to only go and do it again and really not care.

However, having said that, it seems that he may be being a tad honest with you, there are two sides to every story and you do say that you two fought alot, perhaps you were/are mis-matched but there is a "form" of love there. I think that he noted that he is still attracted to other women and enjoys laughter, and lust which is always around in a new relationship.

I think that you should find "your match" because settling for someone that you are not really compatable with, is not what you want for the rest of your life.

Don't be a door mat, you accepted it once, if you accept it again, he will know he can do it again.. This will be a constant let down and pain for you.

This is your life too.

[h3artbrok3npnay79]

Thank you for your advice Chandlers Wish. It really means a lot to me. I maybe hurting a lot rightnow, but I am praying to god to heal me from this pain . Trying to hold on for my two kids<3

[pluck77]

I hate to say this, but you gave in to one of the biggest vices us women give into, hope. Your ex-husband comes back and woos you all over again. You, understandably, got caught up in the emotions that you felt when around him and he made you feel like a million bucks. Your ex-husband knew what buttons of yours to push for attraction, based on the fact he won you before, and he won you again. Then him being him, he went out and put himself in a situation that exposed his weaknesses. As it turns out, based on what you are saying, he is easily drawn up in lust for women, regardless of who they are. He probably knows that is a major weakness of his and wanted to have his cake and eat it too. He knew he was about to get remarried and by knowing that, he knew his flirting days were coming to an end. That probably scared him, so he wanted one more rendevous with his vice. He might have been thinking that he would go out on a cruise, without you, flirt and lust about other women one last time and nothing would happen. Yet what really happened was that he knowingly went out and put himself in a situation where he couldn't control himself. When he did that he found another woman who caught his attention and probably because it was something new and exciting, got caught up in his lustful desires and gave into them. Once he was in he couldn't get out, so he just took the ball and ran. He ended up walking out on you and didn't think twice about it. Unfortunately, he ended up breaking your heart again and left you emotionally broken and to pick up the pieces by yourself. Men are some of the most selfish and insensitive people out there. My heart goes out to you and what you are facing.