[bubas]

Hi I have been married for 11 years, been with my husband for 15 yrs, he's just turned 40, we have 3 girls, he just finished an adult apprenticeship, he seems to be very withdrawn, like hes just a body in the house, no communication, no affection, cant make a decision, everything seems to be to hard. No love in the bedroom unless I fully force him to, he never initiates. He's always grumpy and is never happy. I'm not sure what to do, he agreed to go to a gp for full blood tests, these test came back clear so now he thinks nothing is wrong with him. HELP!!! I want my fun loving husband back again.

[Ashlee T.]

I'm sure you have talked with him about this, but what does he give as explanation for his behavior?

What has your relationship been like for the past 11 years? Do you believe he's faithful? Is there anything else going on in his life that could be causing this?

[oxy-moron]

As you think he is depressed and he is acting like he is depressed why not look at the healthy ways of boosting mood.
There have been major trials linking depression to the types of fats that people consume.
The Omega 3 fats found in nuts,seeds and fish oil provide a major benefit to mental health. Trans fats have been linked to the onset of depression in a very large Spanish trial. Try putting him onto daily fish oil of flax oil supplements. Using Olive oil in cooking could help as well. Avoid transfats in the diet.
Get him into exercise as much as possible.
Look into getting daily sunshine or if that is not possible look at supplementing with vitamin D3.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Finishing an apprenticeship at 40 suggests that he became un-employed or didn't have a steady income stream of safety and now he has something behind him that will assist in always being employed in a chosen field..He should feel proud, I am betting though that he doesn't he feels like a failure to his family and I think you know what I mean...

You know men have emotions too. They need encouragement and told of their worthiness in our lives and how sexy they are, good looking, and how proud we are of them.....