[mxridercrf]

sorry there is probably already a thread for this but i need help regarding my girlfriend

we have been dating for 2 months and we were very close friends before this for years, im madly in love with her and she means the absolute world to me, but the other day she broke up with me, and its just came out of nowhere like we were doing absolutely fine we talk all time, and hangout with eachother when we can (long distant relationship but i still get to see on weekends and holidays) and its just one minute everything is fine and then the next she is really anxious and worrying about things for no reason, and im so confused

ive done a little research and when i was reading through some things with relationships affected by pms, its like all the boxes ticked what im going through

now i dont know what to do, should i give her some space by not talking or talking to her, i just need some help because i care about her and she has this golden personality which is to die for but when she gets like this i dont know what to do

[effy2014]

Un-tick the boxes and don't make assumptions. Labeling women, especially a woman you love, will get you nowhere.

There are a number of issues which could cause mood swings in people. There could be additional stress in her life from school, work, family etc. She could have anxiety. You could have inadvertently said or done something that made her question your commitment to the relationship. She might not see that the long distance part of the relationship will end. I could think of many more possibilities. Unless you have charted when her periods arise and she has told you her pre-period symptoms, never assume its PMS.

What to do? Try communicating. You are not with her day-to-day. You love her and want to continue the relationship -- why the break up? What can you do to resolve any issues she may have? Be honest and loving. You may just be able,to,resolve things. I guaranty that if you lead with PMS, you won't get anywhere.

[atskitty2]

I will back up effy's guarantee there. Don't decide for yourself that's the issue based on research. SHE is the only research you should be doing. Talk to her to find the source & work out resolutions.

[kira]

That is a very dangerous assumption to make. It may not even be that random that she changed. Quite frequently we will go along thinking things are fine when the other person is headed another direction. One day it just boils over and everything changes. It's especially a problem in a long distance relationship because you don't see day to day changes very well. Even when talking daily. I've probably done the same to a few guys. They thought everything was fine and I was mentally ending it a little more every day.

[mxridercrf]

thanks everyone for your replies, im so sorry i didnt want to come off as labeling women, im just having a hard time understanding, everything was perfect we were doing things, we had so many things planned and we were being open about everything and it was just working so well, i have talked to her but she is just stressing and overthinking things, its really out of the blue knowing her, and its the reason i think it MIGHT BE pms, and thats whats im trying to get input on if it may or not be

it kills to see her stressing, i wouldnt even bother going to this trouble if i didnt care, but i do, so please, as much as you can tell me guys i want to make it work

[mxridercrf]

and the reason for her breaking up with me from what she has told me, is that she is depressed and losing interests in things i just want to her to be happy

[effy2014]

"Stressing and overthinking things" is difficult to analyze. What stress is she going through? Why is she depressed? Have you asked her how you can help reduce the stresses in her life?

Things may have been working well for you, but is it for her. Maybe she needs someone more than just on the weekends and holidays. Can you be there for her more often?

[mxridercrf]

she has told me school and her future career isnt looking to good and the stress of a relationship is to much, i totally understand the school pressure because it really is alot of stress, but the relationship though, i dont want to make the relationship stressful and i never have, i always tell her what ever pace she wants to move at and when ever she needs me im there, i just want to know how i can take away this stress she feels because there never has been pressure on her, and thus my reasoning of my PMS, because its so sporadic and out of nowhere, its my first time in a situation like this so sorry if my logic is somewhat flawed, even if it isnt a form of PMS i just want to help alleviate her stress, and ive told her this and it like she doesnt even acknowledge it

[sam00]

Just give some time and space, be patient. It may not be easy for you now, but if that's what she needs then i hope you can give her that. Don't think that's the end of it, and still strive but do not overwhelm her o she might shut you out more.

[mxridercrf]

Thank you for the advice, i can do that even though it hurts. I will give her the space and time she needs, but i really hope its not the end of it, she tells me she still loves me and that she doesn't a regret a thing, its just that stress factor, but its so early in the relationship and all the stuff we have done and said to each other it just feels way to early to make a decision like this, so im taking your advice for this and ill see where it goes