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Boyfriend of 2 years, question about something that bothers me.

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  • Boyfriend of 2 years, question about something that bothers me.

    Me and my boyfriend have gotten into plenty of stupid fights the 2 years we have been together, as this is our longest relationship things can be rough some times.
    I know this may sound immature and stupid and yes, I know it is. But after me and my boyfriend getting into a HUGE fight, he immediately either changes his status on facebook to single or deletes me from his friends, most of the time he does both. After a couple of days we usually end up starting to talk again and make up. Now mind you I'm never the one doing any of this to him. Our friends know the routine pretty well, and will usually comment on the status change like "here we go again". A couple weeks ago we got into one of our fights and he did it again, but this time, he still will not change his status back to "in a relationship". I know for a fact because i've asked him that it is because he doesn't want our friends saying anything again. I know it really shouldn't bother me, I mean after all it is only facebook. But this really gets under my skin. I'm the type of person who likes it when you show off how much you love me and are proud to have me with you. It has been two weeks since we made up and he still hasn't changed it. I don't want to keep bugging him about it because it seems to bother him when I say anything.

    What should I do? Am I over reacting? Or is it legitimate that it bothers me?

    Please help

  • I think the issue really isn't facebook it's the constant fighting. Maybe, he's trying to give you a message, or he's very immature and by deleting who you are to him, (which is childish), he's now embarrased "but" knows it will happen again, the fighting and wanting to delete.

    So the issue is why are you fighting so much?

    What can you do about it, both of you, to change it.

    CW
    PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

    Comment


    • I would be incredibly annoyed because his little tantrums are making you look super dysfunctional to all your friends. I have someone on my friends list who is CONTINUOUSLY doing that, and it's always with the same guy. It's all I can do not to say something ugly. haha. If it were me, I'd take the lead, and the next time he does it, I would take my relationship status off altogether. Just remove it, to where it doesn't say single or in a relationship or anything. Tell him you're tired of being embarassed by the childish behavior. It's concerning that he's so quick to do it anyway, and every time?

      Like CW said, why are you fighting so much? Don't be one of those people that finds themselves stuck in an unhappy unfulfilling relationship because you've chalked it up to "well everyone fights...relationships are tough".
      "Be what you're looking for."

      Comment


      • Just my opinion when a guy change his status in facebook even his in relationship even under a fight means that guy has some one else or courting someone just opinion on my side.
        “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”

        ― Mae West

        Comment


        • I don't think he found someone else or is dating anyone else if they continuously get back together and most times changes his status back. I can understand that he just wants to stay off the radar for a bit, but I agree with the other ladies. Why are you guys fighting so much? I agree it's probably best not to display any relationship status until at least your relationship is solid and stable, or...if you both permanantly go your seperate ways.

          Comment


          • If he wanted to stay off the radar, he shouldn't have changed his relationship status to begin with - he has opened the door to public comment by changing his status to single!
            I don't buy any excuses about facebook relationship status when I'm **in** a monogamous relationship. It may be childish or silly, but facebook is important to me - it is a digital indicator of what is going on in my life. I'm sure I'm not the only person in my age group to think that way, and it sounds like you do too. So, why is he publicly humiliating you every time you have a fight? It's one thing if you really break up and intend to stay that way, but what he's doing here is really strange.
            <center><i>Nature gives us shapeless shapes,<br>Clouds and waves and flame,<br>But human expectation is that love remains the same,<br>And when it doesn’t, we point our fingers and blame.</i><br><a href="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/register.php">Register</a>|<a href="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/members/little.html">Contact Admin</a>|<a href="mailto:support*womens-health.com?subject=Forum Contact">Email Admin</a></center>

            Comment


            • People say all the time that it's "just" Facebook, but lets face it: Facebook is an outward portrayal of our personal lives to the public and our friends. It would bother me if my boyfriend did that, and I don't think you're overreacting at all. I don't like how he's downplaying how you feel about it, and to me that means there are much deeper issues at play. The fighting doesn't suggest good things either, as others have commented.
              sigpic

              Comment



              • Widowed and not in a Relationship and Not looking.
                But I just looked at my FB

                General Info about 3 -4 photos. Friends and Family are .. Those who are Allowed. By putting it Personal, not All or Public.

                I do not change anything about myself. I do Delete things on My Personal Wall . Daily. If one of my Friends shows improper sayings or even the Sweetest Pic's of their Own Personal Kids ( than can be Tracked ) by clicking on their " Profile ", From my Wall .

                If say , So and So ,are married or in a fight, I don't look at their " Relationship Status " Day by Day.
                If they have a Azzkickin Fight. I will hope both stay on a Friends List.
                FB is a " Talking Machine" Twitter & Tweets is a I'm just tellin you what is happening right Now.

                Taking your " Status " back and forth. Gives more to Gossip than actual Fact. If people have the Time to " Update or Change " the Relationship Status Daily. They have time to go give that person a Hug or sit down and Discuss, Why.. there may no longer be a Relationship.

                We had to Sign a " FB /Email " Release last week at work. Which means my Company can Watch My Facebook and My Space and any Twitter account. We can also be Fired for any mention of our Company, any mention of Co Workers, Good or Bad .

                Now.. Some are equals with my status, some lower and some my supervisors. I should be a Rat Robot ? Not care or befriend someone who has worked with me , daily or yearly ?

                And if they post, " hard day at work, Can't wait for a few days away, going to a Winery , getting Drunk & Having Sex and some freedom from my Store ".

                Umm I am now obligated to " report " Offensive post on FB ?

                I'm thinking, It's Not your Business as Long as I Perform my Job Well and with Intelligence or Knowledge. My People and Co workers have lives, that once the " Clock " says go Home.. It is a Different World.

                So, hopefully Non Offensive

                Why do you Check his FB, Why don't you or he change it. Is there a Way you can Both Share a FB ? Start over , share the Love, share the pics of Days that are good for you Both ?



                **** Note Here ****
                I had a email, None of my FB matches for my " Corporate them Spy Work " .
                But I have " Business Email ". If they need to contact me about business, they have it . If they want to know how my broken foot or my back is doing "
                It is an Separate Email.

                Try not " Spying ". Make a Joint FB.. Try Trusting and then your being friends with those whom are possibly going to catch You as his Choice..Not at the first but as the one that may be a " keeper ". You may get through your Decision and Commitment to each other.

                If not, you will know when to " Hire or Fire " them .
                The thing is, with the " New Tech "

                They Can Watch you and you Them.
                Start Fresh, Start New, Start today with Trust..






                Comment


                • Facebook is more than a talking machine for me - it's a memory book. I really LOVE the timeline feature for making it so easy to go back to a certain year or month (I've had Facebook since 2006!) and see what I was up to, what I was feeling ... it's not so easy to give up or start over for those of us who are more invested in the profile we've created.

                  Sad that OP hasn't been back since posting, I'd like to see how this turns out :/
                  <center><i>Nature gives us shapeless shapes,<br>Clouds and waves and flame,<br>But human expectation is that love remains the same,<br>And when it doesn’t, we point our fingers and blame.</i><br><a href="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/register.php">Register</a>|<a href="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/members/little.html">Contact Admin</a>|<a href="mailto:support*womens-health.com?subject=Forum Contact">Email Admin</a></center>

                  Comment



                  • I agree Little, FB and even My Space can be " Memory Books ". But one can always start a " Professional FB, on top of the more Personal one.

                    I haven't tried the Timeline yet. And for Photo's I still have Photo bucket, from 2001 to Current . I have gone back to like page 23 and saw pic's of stuff, I'd forgotten about . Good Memories

                    But I learned to keep my Professional Site and Emails separate than any Personal one.




                    Comment

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