[april1987]

Guys are always complaining that "Females Play Games" and wish they would be straight forward, but they're worse than us! The last few guys I've dated have played more games than I even knew existed. My most recent date is no exception, and it's driving me crazy. Here's what happened, tell me what you think?

I met this guy, lets call him Chris, at a local dive bar. We chatted for hours, I gave him my number, he texted me the next day to hang out. We made plans for the following Thursday, 5 nights after the initial meeting. We started out a bar for drinks then decided to go for a walk around the neighborhood. I just moved to the area, about a month ago, and he insisted on playing tour guide. We had a blast. An hour later it's midnight and we both realized we have work in morning. He walks me to my car we chat for another 10 minutes-he hugs me goodnight. Seriously, a hug. No kiss. That should have been a red flag.

Shortly after I return home he begins texting me, telling me how much fun he'd had and that he can't wait to see me again. We agreed to touch base the next night when I got off work, then said our goodnight's and went to bed.

The following night I texted him when I got off work. No answer. It's been 2 days.

Clearly he's just not that into me, which sucks. Why do guys do that? Why tell me how much fun he had with me, how excited he is to see me again, yada-yada-yada, if he wasn't planning on seeing me again? AND why no kiss goodnight.

Ugh, men suck.

[Harmony]

There are so many reasons which could explain his behavior, none of which would have any bearing on your behavior.

Re the kiss he could have just lost his nerve, I'm AWFUL at the first kiss, unless the women proactively helps me set it up (making it very obvious I need to kiss her) I'd rather postpone it than risk ruining it.

To be brutally honest, if I had to make a guess on what happened I'd say he probably has a GF and was hoping for sex that night, so when you didn't invite him back or imply you wanted to go back with him he ducked off. This is not your fault. And he wasn't looking for a relationship anyway so you dodged a bullet.

It's difficult to find someone to love who'll love you back, and that applies for everyone. The more beautiful and/or wealthy you are just means you attract more people to you for the wrong reasons, why do you think celebrity divorce rates are so high?

The most important thing to remember is that words lie and actions don't, judge men by what they do, not what they say and you'll be fine. Actions talk and BS runs the marathon.

[rcoreyus]

Its always possible that something has prevented him from responding to your texts. Phone problems, travel etc. Everything else points to a guy who really likes you but didn't want to push things too fast.

[Pollon]

The fact that he didn't kiss you on a second meeting (didn't quite meet the "date" threshold), is playing games. I'm with rcoreyus. He may just not wish to move too fast. And there are a plenty of reasons why he might not have responded to your text.

However, Harmony could be correct. He might not be available.

[mrmusic]

Dump him, i guess he is too boring because he doesnt feel excited about you

[azalea]

He walks me to my car we chat for another 10 minutes-he hugs me goodnight. Seriously, a hug. No kiss. That should have been a red flag.

...

The following night I texted him when I got off work. No answer. It's been 2 days.

Clearly he's just not that into me, which sucks. Why do guys do that? Why tell me how much fun he had with me, how excited he is to see me again, yada-yada-yada, if he wasn't planning on seeing me again? AND why no kiss goodnight.

Hi April! It sounds to me like he got shy about kissing you :] Since it was your first date, maybe he just didn't want to be too pushy or get too intimate right off the bat. He might not have known that you wanted a kiss, and he might have been trying to be respectful and not come off as creepy by making the moves himself. He may have had bad luck in the past with coming on too strong. He might have been waiting for you to kiss HIM goodnight :] It might not be that he isn't into you, he just takes a different approach to the early stages of dating. Maybe he doesn't want to come across as clingy or desperate, which might explain the delays in his texts, or maybe just a hectic work schedule or personal life, business trips, etc.

I'm not sure that he's unavailable... it doesn't sound like he was just in it for a one-night deal but then gave up when he saw that wasn't the case. From your description, he sounds sweet and respectful. I hope he gets back to you!

[amy37]

I wouldn't worry about the no kiss part. There are alot of people who don't kiss on the first date, expecting that may be asking too much.