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Recommendations for online dating sites

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  • Recommendations for online dating sites

    I know this can be a difficult question since age & location probably play a factor in all of this, I am 46 years old and live in Northern Ontario. I joined eharmony awhile back and wow what a waste of money. Not sure if I screwed up my profile or what. I joined POF a few weeks ago, and at least I had some interest, but there of course is the "special" people too. I really don't like the idea that just anyone can join but on the other side of the coin I don't like spending a lot of money for nothing.

    Eharmony, why do they have that special guided communication system? Feel a little bit like I am a child.

    POF, not sure if I like the idea that someone can tell if I am online, I kind of feel it is creepy. But guess it is there way of getting people to chat, instead of eharmony's wonderful guided communication system.

    What are the other sites like?

  • OKCupid is a pretty good one as well, its free. About the debate free vs payed; payed sites attract more people that want to actively date but have for some reason not been able to do so in real life. The free sites have the same people but also have people who are doing okish or better in real life, dont feel like taking out money to pay for a dating site, but are just looking for that extra place where they can come in contact with people.
    You have to be able to just somewhat ignore the 'how are you' 'hi' messages and spot the interesting ones.


    • okcupid is where I met all my bfs and husband. The thing with online sites is you have to be active despite the fact nothing may happen for months. Maybe every 4 months I found someone interesting to talk to and every 6 months found someone worth meeting and I've answered something like 2000 questions. I also used to picked 2-3 stalking targets every week and visit their profile daily, took the same tests as them, etc..... for a week. If they didn't message me after a week I decided whether to message them or pick new targets.


      • Thanks avgmale for telling me the difference between paid and unpaid sites. Have to agree I get a lot of hi messages.

        Kira, 2000 questions?? Wow!! I still laughing at the "target" term. I have a lot to learn, I somewhat feel like a teenager again. lol


        • I'm not a fan of online dating, as things can get slow. You never know, as some people have had success stories. I would say match.com was the most decent. Okcupid and pof has some characters.
          "Dating is like slow dancing. Let the man lead, or you will fall all over your feet"


          • Some people like pof but I just found it full of perverts and guys wanting one night stands. If you want sex that minute it probably works great. If you want a relationship not so much. It was a useful place to run experiments on how to find guys and get to the point of meeting because there was a lot more action than the other free sites. It just wasn't good action and I never went through with meeting anyone off there. When I was done experimenting and it reached the point of annoying I switched to okcupid. Quality over quantity. Not that you still don't have to wade through lots of stupid messages. The depression board adamantly defends pof because they've found a lot of friends off there. I rank it slightly above using craigslist.


            • Magnetism that is what I found with eharmony, I haven't had a match I would say in a month and it seems like everyone's profile is the same. I read the profiles but I understand it is hard to write them, generally we all have a problem of tooting our horns. I wish I tried match instead. I am still too new to the online dating thing to see if it a waste of time. But I thought in my case it was a good place to start. I really don't want to start my dating with blind dates set up by friends.

              Kira I have found those "special" people of POF as well. What is the depression board?


              • Just google depression chat rooms and you'll find it. It's the biggest chat room for that on the net and has a small forum attached to it. I wander there when my insomnia is getting the best of me but it's really not any help except as a distraction because no one has insomnia like me so no one understands even though everyone thinks they do because they've had a few nights of difficult sleep or something. If I get told to drink disgusting chamomile tea one more time.....


                • Joined match.com. Joke is on me!! Found the same people that are on eharmony and pof. And someone did email me right away on match. Apparently he wants to show me a video of him doing you know what. OH BOY!! Very excited 0_0.

                  I think after that message, I will not be venturing into the depression chat room.

                  Kira I have had insomnia for years, I think it is a girl thing. I was on sleeping meds that worked like a charm, but during the day I felt like a zombie. Doctor wanted me off them, darn it. After getting of the drug I still find I fall asleep a lot quicker, but I don't stay asleep for long. Do you find it hard to turn your brain off at night?


                  • I stopped using okc and match after one too many awkward dates lol. My coworker showed me cliqie.com and I’m a big fan of that over the others in terms of actually meeting people vs. just entertainment. It has a different approach that feels less sketchy cause you and your friends essentially act as “wingmen”. I like that it helps you find things to do too. Skout’s okay too, but still has it’s fair share of creepers


                    • If I stop meds I die. My body handled it as a teenager but I was under weight and constantly under strain. My hormones were a mess and my immune system would crash occasionally leading to 105F fevers where I'd do nothing but stare at the wall blankly for entire days until it went down. Now at almost 30 with some heart trouble I'm certain the insomnia would kill me.

                      t has a different approach that feels less sketchy cause you and your friends essentially act as “wingmen”
                      If I had friends I wouldn't need online dating sites.

                      eharmony is just a stricter version of the rest. Their long starting questionaire rules out most of the people, like me, who are hard to match or want casual sex so they can boast a higher matching rate than other sites and longer relationships. It's really all just the same people though as the free sites.


                      • Why not rename this the 'Online dating questions' thread instead of having them all fragmented ? Just a thought.


                        • its okey if you do online dating,for me it is much better if you really meet someone in person, but there are also chances of getting to know in an online dating...its your choice where your comfortable with "online dating or meeting someone in person."


                          • I can't tell you how many horror stories women have told me about their online dating experiences.

                            I have been exposed to research that indicated that at least 80% of men who are dating online are lying about at least one material fact.

                            Men will write in their profiles what women want to read; e.g., long-term, exclusive relationship leading to marriage when what they really want is quick sex, but if they told the truth they'd never get dates.

                            My ex is on Match & has been for about three years. She has yet to meet one decent guy. She has met only con artists & flakes. She met a guy for their first and only date. He had written in his profile what she wanted to read. While dining with him, the topic of conversation transitioned to sex, assuredly directed by him. She told him that she would not become intimate unless she was in a committed relationship. He got up & walked out on her.

                            Not all that log ago there was a story of a man who was online dating. He had intentionally infected 300 people with HIV. He is not the only online dater to have intentionally infected others with HIV. One has to wonder how many people who are dating online that have diabolical motives.

                            My ex said she'll require a blood test prior to intimacy. She has told me that she hasn't been intimate with anyone but me. I hope she remains committed to her blood test requirement. I think it's extremely wise to trust but verify. And an STD panel has a 24 hour turn around. If someone can't wait 24 hours before intimacy, you'd have to wonder why.


                            • startdatingtoday********************

                              Online dating sites is fine.. It's an opportunity for you to meet new people
                              but if you can grab some time, try to stroll around the neighborhood and
                              meet real people in person.. Actual conversations and sharing of experiences
                              are some of the great contributors of a lasting relationship..

                              call me Tom. startdatingtoday. o r g...



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