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Attractive Careers.

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  • Attractive Careers.

    I know that there are a large number of things that can be attractive or unattractive about a person, but I was curious what people's (and especially women's) reactions are to finding out what a date does for a living. What sorts of jobs are or are not attractive. I'm talking about relatively common careers: truck drive, or programmer, or park ranger, not astronaut, supreme court justice, or rock star.

    I have a dim memory of once hearing that computer programming was considered a very unattractive career - so it got me thinking.

    Does it matter to you? Does it matter aside from the associated income and job security?

    If men answer, what sorts of careers matter for women you date?

    For me, I'd be most interested in careers that suggest that the other person likes to think and discuss: Engineer, writer, attorney, scientist, reporter, etc.

  • Speaking as the working-class recent college grad I once was, I wanted a partner whose job looked something like 40 hours a week with benefits - bonus points for stable hours. Room for growth. Not a whole lot of preference for income, since even full time on federal minimum wage will pay the bills in my area. Not much preference for the education required, either. My main concern during the last period of time when I was single was finding somebody who had a good work-life balance and was willing to spend a significant portion of the life part with me.

    I had just exited a relationship with a guy who was in the military and deployed, which had followed another long-distance military relationship. Their jobs made it hard for me to get what I needed out of a relationship and I swore off active duty military men at that point. Any jobs that would require my partner to be away often - truck drivers or other heavy traveling jobs - would get the same treatment.

    Realistically in my rural area, I'm not going to run into very many people with "interesting" jobs - small communities can only support so many lawyers, doctors, and engineers. People's hobbies are more important here. A retail or factory job can only say so much about a person.
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    • I think that when I got a job that paid enough to afford a home in the area I live, my confidence increased and that was more attractive to women. Before becoming an engineer by profession, I was a technician. That was never a problem.

      If I had stayed in the town I grew up in or nearby, Little's description of what was available would just about cover it. I probably would have commuted 20 to 50 miles to a job that paid better in a city area nearby. But with longer commutes comes less time at home and worn out cars. Instead, I moved across the country to a city with expensive housing but with many more prospects for a good paying job.

      In some societies, a title like engineer is a distinct source of pride. I've seen people take pay cuts for a while to gain such titles. The pride extends to the other family members.

      With two brothers who have computer science degrees and work at jobs that include computer programming, who are both married, I'm not sure that being a computer programmer is an unattractive career for dating. There are computer programmers who work insane hours, though. Both brothers make about the same as I do.

      My personal belief is that finding the right person is hard enough without complicating it by being too restrictive on the type of work they do. Keeping busy and possibly working is important, but requiring specific careers is too much, IMO.
      I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
      Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

      From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia


      • Usually anything that suggest money are attractive to me, or anything that suggests they have a degree. Engineer, Programmer, even Sales..
        "Greatness is a lot of small things done well. Day after day..."


        • Does the attractiveness change with money, is a CEO of a big company more attractive than an engineer, or is it just that they have a career that provides a solid income. (just curious).


          • I find 'cool' jobs attractive. Also professions that imply that I will be safe (literally, physically safe) are a turn-on to me. It's not that I feel insecure, just that it's kind of hot knowing that the guy on my arm can kick butt if he has to.

            Money is a non-factor for me, assuming that the basics are covered - not indigent and won't be dependent on me. I don't enter into codependent financial relationships anyway, but it's moreso that I don't want to walk around with the uncertainty that I might have to buy you lunch at any given moment. That's a turn-off, no matter how good the sex or whatever else might be.

            I don't know that I would really find any job unattractive ....maybe garbage man or something but that doesn't make the person unattractive, just that they are handling garbage by day and might be unattractively dirty. But I don't think computer engineer or grade school teacher and automatically go "Oh that's so lame."

            One thing that I'm NOT impressed by though is people who are impressed with their own income. Sorry sweetheart, but if I wanted to I could out-earn you anyway. I just don't put huge stock in that as some kind of selling point, so get over yourself and come back down to earth or you'll end up spending your money on prostitutes.
            [FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR="#800080"][B][SIZE=4]Woman trapped inside a woman's body![/SIZE][/COLOR][/B][/FONT]


            • Jobs that require thinking and any kinds of breaking traditional norms. So a college professor/researcher would be very attractive. Or an artist, but the kind who are super dedicated and worked hard, not the party all night, get drunk and play in a band type. Doesn't have to be super rich, but dedicated. A social activist but with a level of realism and practicality - money is not the main objective but still is realistic enough to have a job with benefits or has a good paying job that can pays for the social activism.

              Blue collar jobs - very unattractive. Sorry, I am an academic snob. Even if the person was a successful contractor with their own business, it would still be a turn-off. Basically a job that requires a college degree is a must.
              Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose - Kris Kristofferson and Fred Foster (sung by Janis Joplin)



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