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  • ManxomeMe
    Junior Member
    • Nov 2008
    • 2

    What to do

    what would you think if the guy you had been living with had set up a fakeprofile on a social website as a woman. He has befriended ex wife (who he is very angry at, yet I belive he still has feelings for. He has been divored just a few months they were together 3 yrs)and other females.


    He has been trying to befriend my friends of the opposite sex. Not with his own male profile but with this fake female one?

    Doesnt that seem somewhat messed up? Would you think that this is unstable possessive behavior?
    Last edited by CHANDLERS WISH; 11-03-2008, 12:27 PM. Reason: edit for member
  • WildChild
    Banned
    • Sep 2008
    • 14142

    This is 'messed up' behavior. But how is it you are living with him just 3 months after his divorce? That's a bad idea, he needs time, probably a year or more on his own to get past the old relationship. Obviously, he's nowhere near ready to be with you if he's befreinding his ex using a fake female profile.

    Comment

    • ManxomeMe
      Junior Member
      • Nov 2008
      • 2

      Thanks for your input. I agree that I let this move much too fast, before I had known many things about him that I know now. I have found over time that he is very secretive and obsessive, not just with the ex but with me as well. I know he follows me online and his trying to befriend my male friends as a woman. I actually addressed this fake profile issue with him last night and he closed the account. But the fact remains that although he closed it, I still wonder, based on his actions I have serious doubts he would not do it again, it seems to be his nature.

      He lives with me and although helpful around the house has always been inconsistent on paying for his portion of the rent. He either doesn’t pay on time or only pays a portion, never in full. We moved in together because it was supposed to benefit us financially. It was a mistake, as I find that the extra financial burden of him is more than I can handle or even want. I pay for everything. Sometimes he buys groceries but when it comes down to basics like the roof over our heads and the utilities, I haven’t been able to count on him. I care for him and he tells me how much he loves me and wants to have children with me (he knows I want kids and he does too) but I am not willing to have children with him. Why? I cant count on him now so how could I count on him with kids?
      I feel played and I feel like an idiot.

      Comment

      • Livelaughlove
        Veteran Member
        • Aug 2008
        • 456

        To be honest

        I set up a few profiles as a women to see how men respond and talk to women online. It was innocent and it was for my own education. Maybe this is what he is doing aswell.

        Just a different outlook for you.

        As far as him not be a suitable provider, and father. If you can't count on him to help you with bills and chores around the house then it is domed to fail.

        Live laugh and love
        Nice guys don't finish last, weak guys finish last.

        Comment

        • Livelaughlove
          Veteran Member
          • Aug 2008
          • 456

          Domed = Doomed
          Nice guys don't finish last, weak guys finish last.

          Comment

          • CHANDLERS WISH
            • Mar 2008
            • 22440

            It's manipulative.

            It's a way of ascertaining and finding out "inside information" that he wants to know, by be-friending his ex, he will be able to open the door to her thoughts on her past relationship ( him )... by befriending your male friends, he is ensuring his "safety" of you not cheating as he should be able to worm his way in finding some things out if need be.

            Was he cheated on by his ex-wife? Or did she walk because she "couldn't count on him?".

            As for him not contributing and getting you further into financial debt, do a budget sheet of weekly/monthly costs including utilities and food and write on there the amount you both have to contribute 50/50 and leave it on the coffee table when you are not home for him to walk in and see. Then say hey, I've done a budget so do you want to join bank accounts or have a direct debit weekly transferring into my account to pay for "our" bills?

            If he skirts both, in-other-words won't do either, you have your answer..

            CW
            PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

            Comment

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