[sine101]

Alright,

So i my boyfriend of a year and half broke it off with me at the March.. he sd that we dont really have future together and there is no point of us staying together if he knows its not going work.. i sd to him that no one knows the future and if that is how you feel then there is nothing i can really do about it except accept it..

Well we were having our break up convo he spits out really fast that he is leaving for Rome and Spain 5 days later and will be gone for 2 months.. I know that this trip was going to happen bc we were going to meet up in Spain and travel the rest of the way through together.. well that didnt happen bc we broke up...

When he got there he emailed me 4 days later to let me know how it was going and what not.. over the course of the 2 months i received a few more emails and text msg saying he was unsure of what he wants and can not make any rash decisions... i started to just let them go... there was no point of me responding.. it was hurting all over, again and again every time i got one...

Well he came back and we met up the day after for him to fully clarify that he doesnt want to be with me and move on..he couldnt even look me in the eyes to say this... yada yada yada.. the next day i find out that he got super hammered and got on a plane to Mexico bc he couldnt bare to be in the same place as me.. nothing like running away from your issues...

He came back, we didnt talk and on the weekend we had a mutual friends brithday to go to... i made sure i looked amazing to show him what he was missing out on.. well it worked and he started talking to me.. getting possesive with the other guys over me and then ofcourse we made out.. ahh wrong thing to do i know... well it turned into us going back to his house.. we didnt have sex.. i made it clear to him that i will not sleep with anyone who i am not dating.. no matter what!!!! Well that was sat night and its now tues and i just left his house this morning to go to work.. when we were watching movies in bed on monday he sd that he is very confused about the whole thing and not to mention that on sunday evening we were out with our friends and one of them decided to make an awkward moment and say "who thinks these 2 will get back together again" some ppl put there hands up and others were so shocked that our friend would say something like that.. but then again drinking doesnt help.. lol

Now im not sure what to do at this point.. i really love him and it shows that he loves me too but why cant we be together? Even his best friend is confused about it... Im stuck and need some serious advice!!!

[Joy]

well give it time stop chasing him let him run........... only time will sort this out.

[ren_07]

Run from him this time.

I've been in this situation three times this year. First I was your lover here, then I was you while the man I loved was behaving the same. I switched into wanting him when we were separated for a month and a half on purpose to see if we'd come back to each other. He became bitter when I talked to him again to confess my desires to be with him and refused me. He was then confused and we had an inbetween thing for a little bit before he said he needed to stop talking to me to fall back in love with me. Being helpless, I agreed and didn't hear from him for a month and a half. When I did he was confessing his love for me once again, but I had decided this was and forced myself to move on.

I knew I deserved someone who is certain of their feelings for me and I can rely on. Not someone who's wishy washy or confused. If you can't see how much of an asset I am and how valuable I am as a person, then I'm not going to waste my precious time trying to convince you of how you SHOULD feel. It should be obvious.

And this applies to you too. So do yourself a favor, put on the figuritive pants he now wears, and say you can't take it. He won't like that you've made the decision for him and will either come back to you in a love procession or be the wanderer he's become.

[amaranthine]

I don't think it's worth it. If he doesn't know how he feels after a year and a half, he never will.

[lilypad]

I understand that you may love him very much but if he is unsure of his feelings you cannot chase him, back right off and turn cold, hey even start dating other people.

If you are determined to make it work then you can give him ONE more chance after he wants to be together again and if he does the same thing run a mile.

He may just be young as you did not mention your ages and just wanted to see what was out there when he was travelling and not a reflection on you.

Now I'm not one to play games but it sounds like he is playing games with you so ignore him and then it's up to you to make your descision. x

[sine101]

Thanks ladies! I totally understand the whole cold shoulder thing.. He is going to be 27 this year.. Im turning 23.. Were not talking at the moment.. im waiting for him to make the next move.. there is no point of throwing myself at him time after time to get just rejected.. i think that is what hurts the most.. we do have a wedding to go to in 2 weeks.. its his friends getting married and they have asked to attend before we broke up and still want me to bc they consider me a really good friend.. and i have offered to make there wedding cake.. (cant give up an opportunity to do something that i love doing)
He broke up with me once before this and came running back after i sent him an email saying goodbye (we were on a break, and i called the shots) When he came back i specifically sd that i wanted to get married, have kids and travel... not in any order ofcourse.. he was totally into it.. then a year later this happened.. if he does come back.. he will have to prove to me that he will never do this again...lol it may be asking for a lot, but i cant be putting my heart on the line every time.. its not worth it, to get hurt over and over again...

[Joy]

I don't think it is asking too much. You guys have to find a balance that makes you both happy and want to share your life together.

[Juda2oo9]

also...... make sure there isnt another woman who is making him "string" you along cause he doesnt know what he "wants"..........
just seems so fishy...... check on that.

[sine101]

I pretty sure there isnt another woman involved.. we've been spending the weekends together... 3 out of 7 nights a week we end up hanging out and i usually stay there.. ahh such a bad things.. and not to mention all of our friends are wondering what our "status" is.. we get along just great.. so its a hard one.. a part of me wants to run, another wants to stay around.. im taking everything lightly, so when it doesnt come down to it and he says he doesnt want to hang out anymore then i wont be hurt..

[DairyMilk]

Take it from me, I spent 8 years doing back and forth with a guy, this is exactly how it happened the first time, he wa unsure, but there's noway he would let anyone else have me or stop talking to me. he'll turn to you everytime he needs someone/everytime he's lonely/alone, nothing except mysery is gonna come out of this for you and no matter how much he loves youa nd how much you love him it's totally not worth it. It's been only 1 year and some months, get out now and move on you dont wanna be stuck on the wheel spinning for 8 years!