[FFemt]

I'm looking for some advice, I was medically discharged from the army and started college. I passed a entrance test for a pre med program and decided I wanted to get into nursing, I got a job in a nursing home to get some experience and met this girl, I really like her and we get along great( talk on the phone outside of work, text, etc). I want to tell her how I feel but I don't want to hurt our friendship. I am real shy around women, after being in the infantry for two years and working as a professional firefighter to pay for college I just can't form words about that stuff if that makes sense, I also get discouraged when I think about what the other girls might think(her friends at work). ( I am not injured seriously I blew out a ear drum, I am 20 years old and she is 21) Any advice I would greatly appreciate.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I think the fact that you were able to gain her confidence to "text" messages to her means that she is "comfortable" with you.

Seeing as you feel more "comfortable" with texting and are a tad shy why not flirt a little sub-consciously via your text messages and see what happens.

You know, "double meanings?" where she wonders yet, you can get out of it is she takes offense and say, sorry I only want to be friends.

That way you can always turn around and say, " I was stirring you, your a great gal", sorry if you took it the wrong way.

And, if you get a "reply" that kind of shows curiousity, then you can ask her out, in a cool way, "So, you should meet my silent partner, he sits on my shoulder and talks all night, want to meet him over coffee?"..

Jokes are fun.

Good luck sweet.

CW

[Fatin]

dude i totally agree with CW i mean try to start some flirt on the texting and see how she get along with u .. cos i believe that texting can let say words you could never imagine to say ..

[Hopeless Dork]

I am of the opinion that she likes you. If she is responding to all or most of your texts at a pretty reasonable rate of time, that is a good sign. When my boyfriend and I met we started with a friendship with texts and emails and we'd also spend time together at the activity we met at. We'd talk, we're both shy, some time passed and he still hadn't asked me out and I didn't think he would and knew I was too shy to do so. When he finally did, ask me ... I came out of my shyness pretty quick. I just needed to be sure that he liked me - I didn't want to assume. She may be the same way.

Come up with something fairly platonic to do, something you'd ask a buddy to do away from work , not a date necessarily but something that takes the two of you out of the work of environment in person. Her agreeing to go would be an indicator she likes your company. That should help you open up to at the end of the night telling her how much fun you had and would like to see her again... be sure to mention something non 'friend zone' like.. on your outing ' you look very pretty today' , etc.

[WildChild]

Being freinds, or freindly, is a good place to start. Ask her to join you for lunch or meet for breakfast some time- those feel safe. As for conversation, being a good listener is importatant. Ask questions, show that you are interested in what she has to say. Listen for clues. Is there a band she really likes, a movie she'd like to see, would she enjoy the zoo or a museum? Find something you think she'd really like and invite her.

[FFemt]

Thanks for your advice, it's appreciated.

[Fatin]

you welcome ... if you need anything just come pass by