[happy ending]

I am so glad sunnyday, that you are seeing a counsellor, i know i sounded harsh, but honestly you sounded open to change so i was pointing out what could happen if you didnt! well done you have taken the first and most difficult steps to real change, if you stay on that path your life will improve imeasurably.

take care!

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Then, to add to all of this, my boyfriend broke my heart last night. Let me first point out that in our relationship we have both agreed and discussed what we considered cheating and looking at porn is one of them. It was a mutual agreement and something that neither of us like or care about so we knew if it happened it would be like cheating. I caught porn on his computer last night. It upset me so much that I can't describe. Is this forgivable when we clearly had expectations that this was wrong to do in our relationship? However, he makes me feel guilty for it and he is probably right as much as I just want to be mad at him because he CHOSE to do it and could have just not. The only way I knew he looked at it was because I looked on his computer. That was bad on my own, I understand. But I'm always so paranoid of him doing anything that we consider cheating or disloyal to our relationship

To spin a different light.

He knows of your in-security.

I am so glad that you are getting counselling over this, it's important.

But, you BOTH had an agreement and you caught him "lying" I am sorry, I have to have a different take on this.

You did the wrong thing by looking and catching but he did the wrong thing by lying and hiding.

Relationships are about honesty.

You asked for honesty and he hid something.

Please don't take this all upon yourself as it's all your fault over your in-securities. Certainly that's a fact.

But he can't offer an excuse as to why he chose not to tell you if he made an agreement..

Relationships are built on trust as well and he hid.

You must, advise him of this..

It's not that I am saying checking out Porn is BAD, not at all... And, I do understand due to your in-securities he hid it.

He had a fear.

But, he needs to know that he can't say yes to you and then do the opposite, he has to be honest and tell you and then you can work with that.

Make sense?

CW

[artist1633]

don't worry about the porn or your boyfriend. take care of yourself first. once you do that all else that is good will follow. have confidence in your looks and spirit...you will be fine.