[CHANDLERS WISH]

But the sad truth is she is looking for a sugar daddy to bring her to the states and he was mislead, so sad!

Hopefully....we will have a much stronger relationship because of this, It was definitely a wake up call.

You know, women are very cunning...You say the last 5 years weren't that crash hot in your marriage and I'm not excusing that but we are all, emotional creates with wants and needs...

It only takes one smart lady, to play the game and all that we were missing comes flooding in... To him, he probably thought there was no harm, after all it was via email, words, just like we are talking here, words. Again, it doesn't excuse him but it's better than him going out there and fullfilling sexual needs, physical bonding, kissing, touching and yes it always, eventually, leads to more... but then we have to look inside and ask what drove a person to that and understand that, and forgive, if, it was never in the other person's character, if the other person otherwise, before the problems occured in the marriage was a good person...

What I am trying to say to you is, it's 50/50... Don't put the whole thing on him...

She, was a sazzy, smart lady who knew exactly what she was doing, sorced exactly the right person who may give her, her needs, which pertain to finances, not sex, and she pushed the buttons... 50/50...

I think if you were to shift some of that hurt and anger across her way, you may actually see things a little differently.

Yes, a wake up call of what you have and have had for 33 years and will continue to have because, something interviened to ensure it.. Don't throw away 33 years in anger, rather, realisation of how smart "people" can be to work their little magic on people who start to get lost, in order for their own gain..

CW

[SNORELL]

thanks for the response...unfortunately it may have been more than emotional but I will never know the full truth. Turns out he spent an extra day in this country and at this point in our survival I'm attempting to believe him....but so many lies were told. Lies about the e-mails, the phone calls and texting. I realize part of why he strayed was my reaction (or no reaction to him) his needs and wants....but it's still difficult. I really never thought he would do this but am on the way to forgiving him and myself. Life is full of lessons.