[Yvee]

I was in the mall today (3rd time in 2 years) and I bumped into a dress that I absolutely loved!
But let me start in the beginning. I need a formal dress and I want it to be amazing. I've been looking around a bit and today that dress just jumped at me! BLAM and it was there. . .
I loved it.... everything about it. the colour, the way I looked in it, well you know
Anyway, its a designer dress - one dress per size and pretty expensive. Obviously I can't afford it...
I complained to my boyfriend about it.
Now he knows how hard its been for me (I recently gained weight and am really uncomfortable about that) and that I hate shopping. Hearing me renting about how amazing a piece of clothing is, is really really uncommon.
Anyway, so he offered to buy it. I said that I'll think about it. BUT the dress isn't going to just wait for me to come around to the idea that my boyfriend spends a sum of money on me...
I really don't know what to do. I mean I really really want the dress and yet, he haven't even payed for it yet and I already feel uncomfortable and already go out of my way to please him. I don't know. Maybe I'm just being silly!

[grrrr]

can you get it altered? It's nice that he'll buy it for you... I hate dresses too...

[rcoreyus]

Just my thought: Give him a big hug and kiss, thank him for offering to buy the dress - but don't actually get it. The dress may be nice, but it won't be worth the stress if you wind up not wearing it, or if makes you self-conscious about your weight. That way he won't feel at all pressured to buy it, you won't feel you "owe" him - I think everyone is happier all around. Maybe let him take you out to a romantic dinner instead.

[Mes T]

Iiiii think, that if you hate shopping and generally don't like the way you look, and then HAPPEN to come across a dress that just sort of magically makes you feel like a princess (oh, this stuff happens. More often than you may think.).... then you should get it! And wear it! A lot!

The right piece of clothing can do wonders to alter a person's self-confidence level.

If your boyfriend buys it, it can be like an early birthday present... or something. So you can feel less guilty about it and just enjoy the gift. I'm sure he'll be pleased to see you happy.

[grrrr]

Wow. That's awesome that he's happy for you and is happy to buy you something that makes you feel like the confident woman that you are! I say GO FOR IT!

I don't think that in this case you should feel guilty about him purchasing it for you - you can make him a delicious dinner and give the hugs and kisses as suggested. Sometimes people find joy in other people's happiness! I think this is one of the cases!

I hate shopping too, btw! I'm glad that you found something that you love and fell comfortable and confident in!

[grrrr]

Note: I totally avoided commenting on my first comment...

[WildChild]

OK. Book time. Get thee a copy of Mama Gena's School of Womanly Arts. If you would feel delicious in this dress, you should have it and if he would get pleasure from gifting it to you, then let him.

Understand that this advice is coming from a woman who has had huge resistance to accepting the idea that anyone would really want to give her anything but trouble. If you aren't open to recieve then you deprive others of the joy of giving. Your comment about gaining weight tells the real story, it isn't Really the cost of the dress, it's the belief that you aren't worth it. He thinks you are worth it. Get it or find a family member or seamstress who can copy (I did my daughter's prom dress last year for about a tenth the cost of the original - it still cost me about $300, it was so worth it).

Get it. Love it. Feel fabulous in it and wear it every chance you get.

[Yvee]

Well I decided to go for it, but now I think I'm becoming too needy. I really want to find something special to do for him and I think in my eagerness I'm coming on a little strong.
Eh I'll pass, always does!

The dress is still beautiful! Going to go pick it up with him tomorrow ^_^

[GlassDaemon]

Iiiii think, that if you hate shopping and generally don't like the way you look, and then HAPPEN to come across a dress that just sort of magically makes you feel like a princess (oh, this stuff happens. More often than you may think.).... then you should get it! And wear it! A lot!

The right piece of clothing can do wonders to alter a person's self-confidence level.

If your boyfriend buys it, it can be like an early birthday present... or something. So you can feel less guilty about it and just enjoy the gift. I'm sure he'll be pleased to see you happy.

I agree with Mes_T totally, there's nothing else to be said, this is it, right here. lol I asked my friend why she buys stuff for me and she told me "I'm young, I can always get more money, I've plenty of time and it makes me happy to give other people things."