[ladyenvyy]

Im in high school, 16 years old... And theres this girl I basically grew up with and she lives in Florida because she got kicked out of school here... well... shes coming back and she wants to go to my school.... well before she went to public school and made boy/girl friends which i didn't even like 1 of dem.... she got messed up cuz of them... she's changed soo much that i fear we aint going to be friends no more or like shes going to think Im the one that "changed"...

well.. how can i tell her or what should i tell her so she wont go "back" 2 her past and act like she did before....

[tinkerbell930]

You just have to wait and see how she is. Don't automatically assume she is going to be bad different. She is probably anxious and scared about how everyone will react to her. Try to be a friend, even if it is at a distance at first. Maybe it will be better than before now that she has had time to step back from there.

[rcatfl]

Look, everyone has problems, but some people seem to get it worse than others. For whatever reason this seems to have happened to this girl-- whether its her fault, cirumstances, someone else's ... no one can reallt truly make that judgment,
BUT... it's not necessarily up to you to have to bear all of her burdens as well as whatver else may be going on in your life. it seems likely from what you are saying that she may look to you as someone to help her. That is fine and understandable. First give her a chance to see if she has changed and to see whether or not she can really move forward with her life. If she hasn't or can't move on, then its unlikely that you will be able to help her in the long run even if you did want to try. She will have to figure things out for herself and relying on someone else (like you) to help her would only result in her dependence on you, a lot of stress on your part no matter how much you care about her, and ultimately her inabilty to find confidence and her personal identity from within.
Sounds like she's gone through a lot, so be nice, caring give her time, but also make sure she doesn't bring you down too much. if she starts to, then you need to let her know nicely that while you understand what is going on her life, she needs to give you space and understand that you have your own problems to dael with and life to live. if she persists, be more firm, encourage her to seek professional help, and refuse to act as her default go-to boy, or psychiatrist. if you are meant to be friends, or more than that, then it will happen, don't force it and don't let her force anything on you.

[Hazanko]

Just curious, what part of NY are you from Lady?