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  • hello_pitty
    Veteran Member
    • Mar 2008
    • 211

    Obsessive friend

    Hello gals (and guys), it's been a while since I posted. The baby is now almost 8 months old and shes such a happy baby!

    Anyways,

    I have this friend, who I am pretty close to just ignoring. The friend is a guy, but he lives in the USA (which is a good thing!!). I noticed lately that he was starting to get "creepily" close to me and texting me EVERY day ALL day. It was getting too much! I asked him to please not text me so much. But he continued anyway. I had to get my phone number changed! (speaking of cell phones, he paid my $800 phone bill even though I didn't ask him to!)

    He's been giving me money and buying me stuff. (I made the mistake of giving him my PO box number...which I changed, again) I asked him to stop all this because I don't want it! I sent all the money orders but he sent them back, so I donated them to the animal shelter! (about $200). Now it's come down to deleting him from my facebook and myspace.

    Today he admitted that he was in love with me and that creeped me out so much. I am happily married with a baby, and he says he respects that but it doesn't seem like it. He has this attitude that "he can't live with out me" and it's starting to scare me. What do I do? Am I being unreasonable by "deleting" him from my life? Because I am starting to get stressed out over him, I want to be JUST his friend. But he seems to think too that we're best friends forever sort of thing and I don't like it. Is there a medical condition for this? I think I may suggest that he go see a councilor and get help. He says he always messes up friendships and relationships, because he doesn't do enough or he isn't good enough? Well it seems to me he pushes people away!

    HEEELP!
    "I might be a little young, but honey I ain't naive"
    "If it ain't an APBT, it's just a dog"

  • jns
    Assistant Admin
    • Mar 2010
    • 8398

    It sounds like he is obsessed with you and if he lived closer he would be a stalker. Do everything you can to remove him from your life including going off of the grid. He may try to track you down. Consider getting a security professional to advise you how to make it impossible for him to track you.

    BTW, with such obsession, I don't think he is a friend.
    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
    ...
    Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

    From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

    Comment

    • Julietpinkrose
      Member
      • Aug 2010
      • 30

      Your friend is not a friend, he is obsessed with you. You should cut all ties with him as soon as you can ....
      The best things in life are free ....

      Comment

      • lala82
        Member
        • Aug 2010
        • 21

        In the past I had a similar experience with a "Friend" like that. He was an obsessive person. He called me all the time and he only wanted that I spend time with him. He created lot problems with my bf and other friends.

        I decided to do not speak with him anymore. I did not answer the phone. I decided to do not have contact with him anymore. It takes times for a person like that, but it works. Do not allow him to damage your life and you marriage

        Comment

        • pocari
          Senior Member
          • Jan 2009
          • 116

          Yes you have your family, it's the thing you shouldnt bother with this kind of friend. Try to talk with your husband and tell him to help you out by talking to this obsessive friend to stop acting like this, because this is really disturbing and he should have all respect to your husband, you, and your baby.

          I know some kind of people who are just like that. He seems he likes to get what he cant get, and trying all he can to give attention, stuffs, etc. the fact, he cant get it and will never get it when he acts like that. people will just run. You're right on what you did. Get rid of him is the best way for now, until he understands and won't bother you anymore.
          Just living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower. ~Hans Christian Anderson

          Comment

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