[pussnboots]

Thanks for your reply. I have considered moving jobs but that will be tough with being a mum as well. There is not very well paid work around here and i am lucky to be in the position i am. I will however do what is right for me and take this negative situation and try turning it around...starting with getting rid of the one person in my life that has made me feel so low about myself. Though i still love him terribly, i can't move past how i have been hurt and emotionally abused. I will just have to find a way of dealing with work and try making my life a positive one again. xx

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Trust is NOT a fault of yours at all... Trust is a high importance ingredient to a good relationship.

You give it, and never stop because otherwise, you will go through every other relationship "not trusting" and won't have a relationship...

Finding a partner that only wants you in your life, is normal, honestly, that relationship may not eventuate to marriage and it may, there is no chrystal ball to see ahead, however, you learn, patterns, those patterns that you don't agree with, morals, and you see them, and as soon as you do, you make it known it's not on and if that doesn't work, you walk away so that you can be with someone who respects your trust, and your morals.

She knowingly had this affair, knew the "codes" no reply means he's with you, so don't reply.

He will go to heaven and earth to put you down and make you feel bad, because he cheated, you caught him and he wants (if you leave) for you to think it was all your fault.

It was not....that's his defence, his way of not accepting and his way to destroy your confidence....

I'd march up to her and say , Honey, he's all yours...but remember, he cheated on me, he'll cheat on you and given you didn't care he was in a relationship, I imagine it won't break your heart when he does, or the next guy, or the next guy,as for me? I deserve better, now do me a favour, you don't exist, I choose who I talk to, just keep walking when I am around"...

And follow through with it..there is no forgiving, or forgetting, stand tall, strong, know your worth, that way you will find someone who wants you and no one else, don't fall into the pattern of forgiveness, you'll pick the same type and go through this again and again otherwise.

CW

[BabyGirl]

I am no longer sure he is the one for me though i still love him deeply for me trust and respect are fundamental. Two things i no longer have in this relationship and doubt will ever come back as it takes a lot for me to trust in the first place. That is a fault of mine...

" I am no longer sure he is the one for me."
This Shows you have Doubts...

" I still love him deeply "
What exactly do you love about him ? Do you love his Lies, His Cheating ? Why not try Loving yourself Deeply ?

"Trust and respect are fundamental"
You have neither with him right now...

" Two things I no longer have in this relationship and doubt it ever will come back"
There is your Answer. Are you willing to waste your time on someone you do not trust and probably never will ?

"It takes a lot for me to trust in the first place. That is a fault of mine.."
Honey that is Not a Fault, that is what you deserve, you deserve to have people in your life that you can trust .

I agree with CW. Though I would do it slightly different.

Walk Proudly into work, let it be known that you are no longer his Girlfriend. Hold you head up, be sweet about it, not Angry or Bitter. Just smile and explain that You deserve better..

And if per chance the one he cheated with asks you or talks to you about him, Just wish her the Best and say you hope she doesn't have to learn the lesson you did in the same way. Smile and walk away with a happy step, knowing you don't have to worry about him anymore.