[kaylar]

, but someone who always washes
his car on Sunday, always leaves at a certain
time, a predicable neighbour.

[kaylar]

When you recall the 'good times' go back before the
event and after the event. Not just those minutes
of pleasure.

For example;

R always remembered that moment when G entered
the hotel room. She forgot how she travelled
alone because G had told his friend W that he'd
come to his party that night.

R & G were supposed to go to city for a reason
but R rode down alone, because G had told W that
he'd come to his party.

When R thought of how beautiful and blessed it
was when G entered that room, she forgot how
horrible and lonely she had felt on the long
ride down.

She forgot that G was someone who would often
pull this kind of 'stunt' in which he'd put
someone or something before her.

R had literally obliterated that lonely ride
to the hotel. But when she began to link it
with his entrance into the hotel room, both
began to pale.

Her 'great' moment turned into nothing, her
lonely time turned into nothing.

M always recalled that lovely day at the beach.
She forgot how when they got home he rinsed off
his skin and ran out to watch the game at someone
else's house.

She always had that morning, the nice way he spoke
how sexy she felt, as the romantic pinnacle of
their relationship.

When she had to recall how he'd run out, she began
to appreciate that maybe he was nice to her so that
she'd let him get her home early, (making her think
of sex) so that he could go to the game.

It is this kind of 'spiking' of memory which is
necessary to get you out of love.

[kaylar]

When you recall the 'good times' go back before the
event and after the event. Not just those minutes
of pleasure.

For example;

R always remembered that moment when G entered
the hotel room. She forgot how she travelled
alone because G had told his friend W that he'd
come to his party that night.

R & G were supposed to go to city for a reason
but R rode down alone, because G had told W that
he'd come to his party.

When R thought of how beautiful and blessed it
was when G entered that room, she forgot how
horrible and lonely she had felt on the long
ride down.

She forgot that G was someone who would often
pull this kind of 'stunt' in which he'd put
someone or something before her.

R had literally obliterated that lonely ride
to the hotel. But when she began to link it
with his entrance into the hotel room, both
began to pale.

Her 'great' moment turned into nothing, her
lonely time turned into nothing.

M always recalled that lovely day at the beach.
She forgot how when they got home he rinsed off
his skin and ran out to watch the game at someone
else's house.

She always had that morning, the nice way he spoke
how sexy she felt, as the romantic pinnacle of
their relationship.

When she had to recall how he'd run out, she began
to appreciate that maybe he was nice to her so that
she'd let him get her home early, (making her think
of sex) so that he could go to the game.

It is this kind of 'spiking' of memory which is
necessary to get you out of love.

[kaylar]

There will be times when you will feel a sense of
regret, almost a mourning. When this moment
becomes very poignant, you have to distract yourself.

You focus on something in your environment, it could
be a plant, an ornament, anything that is bland in
itself.

You stare at it, and tell yourself that you are not
going to think of him. You focus on an unpleasant
incident, then turn to do something else.

Each time he creeps into your mind, you turn to your
distractor.

Eventually you will find yourself almost automatically
looking at your distractor as you begin to think of
him, and automatically get the ugly replay, so that
the time you spend thinking of him becomes less and less.

Instead of feeling this wash of regret, and turning to
your distractor, fighting to get the negative event to
manifest, you instantly turn to the distractor before
the regret hits you, and feel the anger and resentment
for the negative event...all in a flash.

When this happens, you know you are free.

[housewife]

Kayler

Kayler

I print out most of your posts and collect them in one folder (small book)
I think you must be writer or something.
don't worry this book will not be published.

[kaylar]

Thank you.
I do write.

[patricias213]

I love her posts too on relationships etc..I Have learned so much by just reading them, they make alot of sense.

[JubesInquest]

Go Kaylar! Go Kaylar! Go! Go! Go Kaylar!!!