[Addie]

This may sound quite silly compared to most relationship issues,

My boyfriend has quite severe dyslexia, so finds it hard to say exactly how he feels in writing as he just can't think of how to do it.
I completely understand how hard it is for him, but at the moment we are in a long distance relationship as he is at university elsewhere so we have to rely on texting and facebook

Because he can't explain things the way he wants to, it always feels like he doesn't care. Which I know deep down in me that he does, because everything is fine in person. Just a large part of our relationship relies on texting and i'm finding it really difficult as i feel communication is so important.

I feel really selfish as i'm always texting him cause i miss him, and sometimes i don't get the reply i want and i take it heart which is starting to cause way more problems and small arguments than it should. I don't want to risk driving myself insane and losing him...

Anybody got any advice on how to take my mind of things?

[Mes T]

What do you mean, he can't say exactly what he's feeling? Texts probably shouldn't be so in-depth anyway, why not leave meaningful conversations to the phone?

Is it just that he doesn't text as often as you'd like him to?

[Ashlee T.]

Sometimes with texting, it's the lack of tone and intent that is difficult. Some people, dyslexic or not, find it impersonal and don't do well with expressing themselves in that way. The dyslexia probably adds to that.

My boyfriend wants to text all the time. He never really knows how to "end" the texting conversation. He also overanalyzes the texts. He might write me and say "how are you feeling this evening?" (because I have a fractured arm) and if I respond "fine", then he'll respond "did I wake u? I'm sorry if I did," or "are you upset?" etc etc etc etc............ Matter of fact, this morning he asked how I was and I told him I was hurting really bad today. My responses were short (I was typing with one hand), and so he asked if I was upset at him. My response "Have I ever just been randomly upset with you out of the blue?" ........... no. Drives me bonkers.

So, from my perspective, a big part of the problem is.......whatever insecurities you have with the relationship that cause you to analyze his words to that extent. The dyslexia may be a factor, but is not likely the issue at hand IMO.

In a long distance relationship, you're right, communication is key as it is in any relationship. But he just may not be as verbally affectionate as you are.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Addie, tough love above

Look deeply into yourself.

Boys do not know how to constantly say I love you, be emotional, give you butterflies, yet some of us need it.

You know? Everyone has a disability of some description it does not define who you are.

If you feel you need more security? Ask yourself why....

CW

[WildChild]

Skype

[Addie]

Thanks guys, guess I need to look an the broader picture and know that i need to not get so worked up over the small things. its true its hard to know exactly what someone is saying over text, just how it is. i just need to learn not to be so paranoid! It really upsets him that he can't say what he wants, he says when he tries to type something his mind blocks up. i just need to respect that and know he's not doing it on purpose.

and yeah we skype every so often but im on university internet so the connection is just awful and isn't worth it. he's a musician as well so it out a lot.

thanks again

Thanks for the advice

[CHANDLERS WISH]

You know a person says what they feel if it's un-expected His mind probably blocks up because he wonders what you are expecting him to say...

If he's a musician he has passion.

Texting and not getting a reply because he's busy, out, whatever leads to the paranoya, cause you don't get a reply so maybe don't text or if you do just say "missing you" or something that is a statement and don't expect a reply....

The real time is when you two Skype huh

CW