[*~Kira~*]

I love my boyfriend with all my heart and soul and I know it isnt easy being with me. He is not giving me any attention that I crave. I love recieving compliments it makes me feel great, until it hits me its not him telling me. It kind of bothers me when a stranger will tell me I'm beautiful or anything like that because my boyfriend doesnt tell me that or gives me any compliments. I remember when he used to love holding my hand in public you know to show me off but now he really doesnt hold me or my hand in public. He is addicted to his game console. Sometimes when he is playing I'll go lay next to him and he really doesnt acknowlege my prescence. When we first moved in together I fell alsleep with his arms around me now he doesnt. He claims he holds me in the middle of the night, but I have a sleepying problem that causes me to be restless. He doesnt say I love you unless I say it. He says he shouldnt have to say it because I should no he does. I have told him this numerous of times but it always results in me getting angry. I tried getting used to it but now it is bothering me. Sometimes I feel like he doesnt want me but he swears thats not it. I know I nag him about it and it doesnt make things easier but I really want this from him. How can I bring it to his attention without nagging him or make it seem like I'm complaining about him I sure would enjoy some responces

[Guest]

Maybe the love is still there and it just died down. He has a new love: games. Ever tried joining him in a game or two?

[JubesInquest]

Kira,

Don't nag. It only drives a person away from you.

He doesn't show you all the attention that you like or say the thing that you want him to say every minute of everyday because he's got you! He see you everyday and you see him; so he doesn't have to try as hard as he did in the beginning because he's got the girl he was after.

So now he's settled in.

Ever tried joining him in a game or two?

Exactly! Good point!

I've been married for many years, and I used to get just as sick of a basketball, football, baseball or hockey game! Even golf and tennis got on my nerves!
But, Kira, guess what? I sat down WITH my husband to see what it was he got out of the game.
I wound up enjoying the games myself!

Now I watch all the sports just about... and will sit there and shout and scream at the tv in a minute! I'm crazy about a hockey game (not surprising, seeing that I used to play that when I was a kid).

Anyway, you want him to "come to you" and treat you in a certain way; how about you stepping into the game console and asking him to show you how to play.
That way, it's more like you're a bit interested in his hobby and not so wrapped in what you want all the time.
He may just come around and do what you've been asking him to do.

[*~Kira~*]

Hey guys I really thank you for your comments. I tried just that and he told me that Madden was his time. So I respected that. Now he did something that kind of hurt me and he doesnt understand why. As I said before he is crazy about his console. Madden 08 comes out aug. 14 next week basically. So he took vacation so he could have a week to play it and guess what. He returns to work August 20 MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!! So he is willing to take vacation for a ****** video game but goes back on my birthday. I'm not saying its a national holiday but I dont want to spend it alone. My family lives in michigan and he is all I have here. The way I see it is theres no point he has already been approved for the vacation. Do you gurls honestly believe I'm over doing it or do I have a right to be mad? be honest please.

[JubesInquest]

Hey guys I really thank you for your comments. I tried just that and he told me that Madden was his time. So I respected that. Now he did something that kind of hurt me and he doesnt understand why. As I said before he is crazy about his console. Madden 08 comes out aug. 14 next week basically. So he took vacation so he could have a week to play it and guess what. He returns to work August 20 MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!! So he is willing to take vacation for a ****** video game but goes back on my birthday. I'm not saying its a national holiday but I dont want to spend it alone. My family lives in michigan and he is all I have here. The way I see it is theres no point he has already been approved for the vacation. Do you gurls honestly believe I'm over doing it or do I have a right to be mad? be honest please.

Kira,
Man, he's really stuck on those games!
So he says "Madden was his time".... DANG!

He's willing to go on vacation to wait on a game to come out, but he's not going to include your birthday in his "off" time?
I don't know Kira... this sounds like one of those times where the Kaylar advice comes into play: go on YOUR OWN vacation for a little while.
I mean it's your birthday, right? So why NOT take the time to pamper yourself... go shop for YOU; go to the spa for YOU; don't you have some girlfriends you can hang out with? Maybe go back home to MI with your family and spend your birthday there!

Let's see if Mr. Madden 07 (or whatever) even notices that you're gone.
If this situations stays the same after you come back from celebrating your birthday, then it's time to consider making some changes.

[*~Kira~*]

you know thats not a bad idea, but I really cant go anywhere on a short notice lol. I really do appreciate your advise for me and i do thank you for taking a moment out of your day to help me. I dunno what to think anymore. I give him his space when it comes to his madden and we watch football together on seprate sides of the coach. The more I distance myself from him and when I come to him he runs away and says he needs his space. I dont wanna play this childish game of cat and mouse. Why are men so immature? lol

[JubesInquest]

you know thats not a bad idea, but I really cant go anywhere on a short notice lol. I really do appreciate your advise for me and i do thank you for taking a moment out of your day to help me. I dunno what to think anymore. I give him his space when it comes to his madden and we watch football together on seprate sides of the coach. The more I distance myself from him and when I come to him he runs away and says he needs his space. I dont wanna play this childish game of cat and mouse. Why are men so immature? lol

Ok, Kira.... so you can't go anywhere on a short notice. But do you think you'd be able to go have a nice birthday with some girlfriends? Maybe you and the girls can go do some shopping; buy yourself something; maybe hit the spa and do some pampering for yourself, then go out and have a great time! Make sure you all go to your favorite restaurant.

Yes, he may not be as mature as you'd like him to be, but it sounds like after you've enjoyed your birthday, you 2 should have a real heart-to-heart talk to see where things are headed.

[rosewater]

It sounds like there is something deeper going on with him. He sounds depressed. Does he hangout with other guys? Go out or play the games with them? Or with his own family? Does he always want to be alone? Does he have a social life outside of the games?

[addictedto being pregnant]

I love my boyfriend with all my heart and soul and I know it isnt easy being with me. He is not giving me any attention that I crave. I love recieving compliments it makes me feel great, until it hits me its not him telling me. It kind of bothers me when a stranger will tell me I'm beautiful or anything like that because my boyfriend doesnt tell me that or gives me any compliments. I remember when he used to love holding my hand in public you know to show me off but now he really doesnt hold me or my hand in public. He is addicted to his game console. Sometimes when he is playing I'll go lay next to him and he really doesnt acknowlege my prescence. When we first moved in together I fell alsleep with his arms around me now he doesnt. He claims he holds me in the middle of the night, but I have a sleepying problem that causes me to be restless. He doesnt say I love you unless I say it. He says he shouldnt have to say it because I should no he does. I have told him this numerous of times but it always results in me getting angry. I tried getting used to it but now it is bothering me. Sometimes I feel like he doesnt want me but he swears thats not it. I know I nag him about it and it doesnt make things easier but I really want this from him. How can I bring it to his attention without nagging him or make it seem like I'm complaining about him I sure would enjoy some responces

my boyfriend is the same but hes here thats ill i need just have a word never keep things bottled up tell him u need to be shown how much he love u or he will lose u hope it helps

[kaylar]

I delayed responding because this is the basic
'old shoe' situation; you'll see it when a man
is having an affair, you'll see it when he has
something 'more important' to do, and of course,
in this situation.

The relationship is over. He wants you around as
an adulterous husband wants his wife to remain...
he's used to her.

You can waste as much time as you want running
behind him, trying to get his attention, or can quietly,
without any fanfare, leave.

When a man...even when a child...gets fascinated by
something...there are breaks...so the kid leaves the
xbox to run outside and play ball, so the kid leaves
the console to have her hair done.

This man is using the game to avoid you. The relationship
is over.