[AshB$]

(Skip down to see main question, thanks!!)
I'm in high school. Up til now, I've had no drama the past couple years. I've stayed away from all that.
Especially after switching schools after my freshman year due to extreme bullying which has left me with a lot of physical, mental, and emotional issues. I'll sum it up: I was harassed so badly that my anxiety took over my life. I developed ulcers and I had ovarian cysts. Got worse with anxiety so I started throwing up. After throwing up so much from stress, I lost weight. (I was never big to begin with, weighing 102 lb at my biggest), eventually started liking the weight loss and I felt better about myself. So that turned into bulimia which I've had for about 3 years now. Which I am slowly getting over. I don't throw up as often but mentally, I'm pretty messed up still...
OK fast foward, I'm in my Junior year of high school.
I made this friend and everything was cool. She got annoying at times, but she was pretty chill. A year younger than me.
I got this boyfriend,(by the way we just got engaged last night) And he has made me happier than anything. I was in the worse relationship the past year and a half and it's so nice to be with someone....more mature, let's say. Well this boy has supported me through a lot. I aspire to be a mortician, don't ask.. But he supported that. He told me to go for it not matter what when everyone else was bringing me down. I never intended on dating him, it just happened.
So I spend day and night with him. I grew apart from my best friend (not the girl mentioned above) and she caused some serious issues last night with my whole getting engaged...What was supposed to be the best night of my life, turned into the worst because of her.. Don't really wan't to talk about it. Don't know why I brought it up lol. Just venting... I need it.
Anyway the girl I mention first got all ****y and told me, you know everytime we hang out your boyfriend is there. And I'm like yeah, I get that. I love him. And to be honest, he has a car and money. This girl, her name is Stefani, all she did anyway was beg my boyfriend to buy her food. Not gonna lie, she is overweight...majorly. Almost 300 lb probably. All she does is ***** about being fat and ugly but she never puts the **** fork down!
Now you're probably wondering where I'm headed with this. And I apologize if I offend anyone who may weigh more than average, but thi girl deserved it. So I get that a couple of my friends are getting annoyed with my boyfriend. Cuz I'm always with him and what not. Well my friends either use me for a place to stay, use me for food, or use me to cover their asses when they wanna go sneak out with a guy.... I don't like being used.
Well I heard from my friend Kate, she's a great friend by the way, that Stefani was talking ****. So I asked details, but I guess she was talking **** about me, to a distant friend named Ashley. So Stefani whined about how she hates me boyfriend. Well, all she ever wanted was to go with him and beg for food! STUPID.. This morning that I missed school and this was going on (My alarm clock didn't go off). She told everyone I was probably just skipping school so I could have sex with my boyfriend. Well, first off, my freaking alarm clock didn't go off!!! Secondly, even if I wanted to see my boyfriend, I couldn't because like a real man, he has a job! So she talked that ****....She also told Ashley I was bulimic....Now Stefani was the only one at my current school who knew I was "bulimic". So hearing this **** from Kate I KNEW that Stefani talked ****. I know I'm skinny but if people talk **** about a skinny person, it's more common to hear anorexic than bulimic. Bulimic is such a specific disease and STEFANI was the only one who knew... So I said screw that *****.
This all happened on a friday. Anyway, Sunday I get a text from stefani asking if I want to hang out. I thought about not replying but I was gonna be straight foward. I told her I'm not gonna be around people who talk **** about me. And that was that. She replied saying "what are you talking about?". I didn't reply. Then again, "Would you please like to enlighten me on what I did?" No reply. "Fine. Don't reply". And I didn't reply.... Several minutes later I get this huge long *** text about her talking **** about me and my boyfriend. Saying I probably skipped school to have sex. and all I do is have sex and it's stupid. Ok, I don't constantly have sex. it's no ones business if I have sex. So I replied back being pretty **** mature about it. I threw in some cuss words, yeah. But I told her straight up I'm not putting up with her **** and it's stupid. And to leave me alone. And she replied back to me a few times. I shot her down.
Today is monday. So I was feeling nervous because me, Stefani, and Ashley all sit at one table at lunch. Well I talked to Ashley friday night about it, she told me everything. And in return, I told Ashley about how Stefani constantly calls her a *****. Which is true.
So at lunch I'd usually sit next to Stefani, so I sat across on the other side of the table next to Ashley. I didn't talk to Stefani, I didn't even look at her... Because like I said, I didn't wanna deal with it. It was JR high ********, I swear. All was pretty chill, not too bad.

-This is where my question would really matter-
After lunch Stefani texts me and calls me a ***** saying I'm telling everyone the situation and I'm trying to make people pick sides. I told her to leave me alone. I wasn't making people pick anything. She was the one talking ****, so obviously it got around and people just happened to like me a little bit more than her. She kept calling me names, she wouldn't stop time after time of me telling her to leave me alone. So like any decent human being, I fired back. Obviously I called her fat. Any fat joke or fat insult I could come up with. And she was doing the same. She called me a psycho. (I do have a history of self mutilation, don't wanna hear negative comments. But anyway in jr high I was really big into cutting. Now as I am older, I hate the scars but I still feel the need to hurt. I have clawed myself and I bite myself. It doesn't leave scars. Just a way to get through). So she said all this **** about how I'm anorexic and a suicidal ***** and I'm gonna die in the psych ward. And she hopes I get pregnant and die. All that. She wouldn't stop.
I think there is a huge difference on making fun of something for a physical feature (ex. obesity, big nose, buck teeth, etc.) verus making fun of a disability or emotional problem (ex. Retardation, anorexia, depression, etc.) I think it's pretty obvious. She kept telling me to kill myself. All I did was call her immature and fat.
"Bleeding out kills. Suicide kills. And stupidity kills. And oh yeah, hun anorexia kills too....even worse. So look in the mirror and at your arms before you judge about weight...."
"Look Ashtin. I m not going to waste my time (she wrote this exactly after I told her to stop wasting my time because she's not worth it) life, or feelings on someone so emotionally damaged. So im just letting you know, lies will only get you so far. (I didnt lie about anything, she was the one denying talking ****)I hope you enjoy life if you don't kill yourself first Uglyness is on the inside. And never goes away. So focus more on beautifying your personality and having a happy outlook on life then biting yourself. It's a little weird. I'd rather be a fat **** than a psycho anorexic."
Now in between the dumb arguing, I kept telling her to LEAVE ME ALONE. But she wouldn't stop.
She kept saying "Watch your back *****. I'll see you later (:" No matter what you say, that is a threat, especially if she felt she had to say it more than once She said I'm getting myself into something I don't wanna get into. Honestly, I'd beat the **** out of her if she didn't weigh 300 lbs.
"Hahahaha coming from you? Ms. Suicidal anorexic bulima *****? yeah funny"
"Cool story bro...now tell me the chapter where you shut the **** up? You don't want the drama...then leave. Because you're getting yourself into something you reallllyy dont want to"
Does that not sound like a threat? After me telling her to get over it and leave me alone multiple times? And she keeps it up!
I saved most of the texts but my dumb phone deleted most of them. I quit replying and even two hours later she wrote "watch your back *****".
I grew bitter and more bitter and finally I was like "I gotta call my grandma text me later" and you know what....that was super *****y on my part because her grandma just died but you kknow what....It makes me want to LOL because anyone who could make fun of someone for having some serious emotional issues, is cold. I don't care about her grandmother. I comforted that ***** when her grandma died. Now I don't give a f-.
All I did was tell her I don't wanna be friends with someone who talks behind my back, is that so awful?! This is like my freshman year all over again with people tormenting me. she even got this other chick to text me saying
"No one would notice if you disappear" so I wrote "poof, i'm gone" just being like whatever. And this girl responded "One could only wish" I didn't respond because I was so sick and done with stupid little kid drama! But I got more texts
"Self biting is a way to relieve stress or cope with a difficult family or personal situation, its a way to block the pain of some other even. And it's weird....."
Then they wrote "Call me * 18775358303" Of course I didn't call....but I made my boyfriend call. And it turned out to be a pschicatric ward.
I gave my boyfriend that number and he texted her saying that we are saving these messages and we will be taking it to the police. So the girl wrote back a ******** message saying "I know I'm being harsh. You'd do the same for your friend. Blah Blah Blah. I'm a defensive person. As the friend of yours i USED to be, look into help" FIRST OFF, this little ***** was NEVER my friend.
So I replied telling her to stay out of it ccuz first off I didn't do anything to her. I didn't even do anything to Stefani, she just attacked me.
So.....THE QUESTION:

Do I have a case???? Anything? I want these girls to suffer. Horribly. I'm a nice person but they pushed me too far. I want to see horribly things being done. I know that's unlikely. But this is harassment, is it not???? I want to sue. My stomach started getting all messed up again and I can't afford to get sick again and develop more ulcers. No. What can I do? My friends and I were gonna go to the consulers at school and talk to them but I decided to wait. After school my boyfriend took me down to the police station, everything was close. My uncle is a cop, he said I should talk to the school cop cuz it happened there.
I know this sounds like drama...It is. And trust me, i don't want any part of it!!!!!! Do I have any case? Restraining order? I want more than that. I want both girls to pay. It's horribly cruel.

Thank you for anyone who responds!
And super thanks to anyone who read all this. You're a champ!!

xoxo

[AshB$]

I was going to also say...I can't get introuble for cussing/insulting her if she was doing the same, can I? Because she started texting me first and she wouldn't stop...Also she threatened me.

[Guest]

You can fight and win your case IN THE MIND! Sounds incredible but it is true. After all what you are seeing in what is said and done is not the whole of the matter. Ideas are presented under conditions that make you believe them and that is causing you to have the medical problems.. stomach messed up etc.

Don't say anything to them or anyone else. See if you can somehow, without them know get some pictures of them, maybe with a mobile phone camera. Download the pictures onto your PC and use MS paint or another similar program. Cut the heads off and use red color and the zigzag cutting tool and make it look like blood is squirting out of their necks. You only need to see it once. You can delete the picture file after that. This put the picture in The Mind. We all share in a mental realm and they will know it immediately. You are likely to feel them jerk over your drawings as soon as they are done. This will stop them harrassing you. You can also add some condition. For instance if they do ......(make specific reference)... then they will fall down break their heads and die etc. Make it deadly because these people won't stop unless there is a deadly effect. You will be surprised that they will leave you alone because if they try to hassle you then they will suffer harm. Crimes incur a debt in the mental realm and that debt you have a right to collect. Don't tell anyone else what you do because you want to maintain an advantage. They can't get around it because they will feel danger but not know what it is.
Kyrani

[KMonte85]

First of, as a Mod, I have to say knock it off with the ***** to insinuate profanities in your post. That is not allowed here.

Ok moving on... I don't think you have any sort of case against here. As harsh as she was to you, you were quite harsh as well. I understand wanting to stay out of the drama. You did good telling her that you no longer wanted to be friends. The one mistake you meant was getting caught up in her backlash and letting the drama continue.

Revenge through police reports or a lawsuit is not going to do anything for you. It will just prolong the drama that you've made very clear you want not part of! Why would you want to do that to yourself? You're just letting this nasty girl get the best of you... and that's not what you want.

The damage here is done, you've both said some nasty things, and it is time to move on. Focusing your energy on what a jerk she was in the things she said will only harm YOU, and that's probably what she wants. Being the bigger person will be the best revenge you could get... so ignore her from here on out, realie you're better than all the drama, and spend your time with the people in your life who bring you happiness and peace.

Block her and her friend's number from your phone. If she finds someone else to text you nasty things, tell that person that you're not fighting anyone anymore, you're moving on, and any further harrassing texts will be reported to the school administrator.

[BabyGirl]

Suing will do nothing for several reasons.

1) Unless you are emancipated, not the physical emancipation, but the legal one, a parent or legal Guardian would have to file the lawsuit.(in most states) in your behalf as you are a Minor, ( if under 18).

2) It takes money to go to court and time, and cases can be postponed for months or years.

3) Even if you won a Judgement if they have no Money, no jobs themselves, their parents would have to pay.

You can, if under 18, have a Parent file a no contact Order and have these kids served, which if they violate it, they can end up in Juvenal Hall. But you still will have to go to court and Prove that this Childish harassment is causing you harm and that you fear for your life and well being.

If a No contact order is placed on them, you will not be able to talk/ text/ chat with them either, or you could be in trouble too.

The Best thing to do, is the MATURE Thing. Change your #, Block them from any Face Book or yahoo or MSN chats or Accounts.
Do Not Reply to anything they say or do.If they continue to harass you at school, go to the School Counselor or Principal. They can face Expulsion or Suspension if they continue to harass you at school.

You have free access to a School Counselor , utilize it, for any of your other issues and your feelings on this issue. You have a Health Nurse for any Medical Issues, you can get resources from them to help with the Bulimia or Anorexia.

Now Go back and read your post, as if it was your little Brother or Sister writing it ( not you ). Do you see the immaturity in it all !!! Your side and their side !!! Can you imagine your parents or any other person that is an Adult, not just meaning over 18, but an Adult in Maturity, having conversations like that ?

Honey it's time for you to take the step, the step to Maturity and learn to ignore and not respond to Childish taunts and Behaviors. You want to be a Mortician, Good for you, you will have to go to College, you will have to take certain Medical classes. You will need your full concentration for College. Start now,be a year or two ahead in the maturity Department. Finish High School with a Good GPA. You will soon be out in the " Real Mature World " You don't have time for Kiddy Games .


Again, Change your # , don't give it out to people you cannot Trust. Do not respond or contact anyone in this Childish Group. Time to be the First to get an A+ in the Grownup Class.

*Note *
I started reading your post and almost quit about 2 paragraphs down. I said to myself, I don't have time to read this Immature Kiddy Rant. But some of your health issues made me read on. Because they are real and you need help to stay strong and conquer them. So if you need support and suggestions on keeping Healthy and not Self Harming, there are many here willing to help you..

But for me, I tend to Ignore the Trauma and Drama of the " Cruel Teenage High School 'Kids. That should be focusing on Getting their Diploma and moving into the Future.. High School was over for me in 1973,but it never was like it is now. Sure we had our lil tiffs, but Negative Behavior was dealt with Swiftly, either by our Parents, the School or just me, saying " they are not worth my time or energy ".

[AshB$]

I know. I was ignoring it for so long but they just wouldn't stop.
More and more people just keep getting pulled into it and I'm sick of it. I haven't even responded back and for hours they kept on going.

[KMonte85]

Block their numbers. You're above all this.

And whatever you do, DO NOT RESPOND. You're only going to fuel the fire if say something back. It's really hard to fight with someone who won't give you the time of day, they'll get bored and stop it. The only way to end the drama is to stop responding and report them to the school administrators.

[Ashlee T.]

Ash - I realize you feel like the victim but I don't see it that way. This Stefani gal is no friend of yours and quite frankly you're no friend of hers. You have said horrible things about her and to her, and she has done the same. This is not a person you held near and dear to your heart and I'm honestly not sure why you were hanging out with her in the first place as you clearly stated she used you and your boyfriend for food. I expect there is also a possibility you have a negative view of her due to her weight, and therefore anytime she eats, you notice when she's eating and what she's eating. And you judge her for it.

I think there is a huge difference on making fun of something for a physical feature (ex. obesity, big nose, buck teeth, etc.) verus making fun of a disability or emotional problem (ex. Retardation, anorexia, depression, etc.)

There is not a huge difference. Not at all. You're insinuating that a person has no control over their emotional problems and should be made fun of for them, but that a person does have control over their physical features? Wrong. You only feel that way because she's hitting you where it hurts. But guess what, you're hitting her where it hurts too. Making fun of someone for ANY reason is wrong, hurtful, inappropriate..........and karma will get you for it eventually each and every time you do it.

You both dished it out, and now you're both getting it back. Take responsibility for YOUR actions (do not blame them on someone else), learn from it, and move on.