[avvie_88]

Thank you for all your responses! I appreciate them so much :-)

Honestly, I feel like I've done EVERYTHING possible. I've tried asking him to hang outside of school, tried texting him to say hello. But no effort, from his part, is put in. I get no response. I'm still extremely hurt by this situation because this is the first time I've ever really liked a guy like this before....but the fact that he's not even TRYING to be friends or for G-d sake's get to know me better, I'm just done trying. I have put so much effort into it but nothing is happening. Maybe the fact that I'm trying too hard and he's getting scared...but still, at least I'm trying here and being assertive.

If he acts this way (i.e. putting in little effort in our friendship), then this could reflect a possible relationship.

I keep crying, and thinking about this situation over and over again, and I need to stop thinking and over-analyzing this!! I have a date tomorrow night, and my heart is not ready to open to another guy...not quite yet. So I feel bad for this guy that I said I'd go out with him, but at least it will keep my mind of the guy from school!

Reading your story brings back soooo many memories. I got a "late" start too, but a similar situation had happened with me when I was 19.
Similar progression of events... except he had asked me, 2 different times to be his girlfriend (we had some SERIOUS circumstances going on, and I felt like he wasn't asking for the right reasons. I felt like he thought he needed to.) Anyway, the 2nd time he asked me, before I could say a word, he told me to sleep on it and let him know the next day. I was so excited to talk to him the following day and tell him I thought he should "be official" (I really hate using that phrase haha), but when we talked, he told me he didn't want to be together. IIIII was crushed. I went from having the "upper hand" to getting knocked on my butt.

2 weeks later, my best friend told me he liked me and wanted to be together when he returned to the states (was stationed overseas). He was waiting for the other guy and I to "cool off" so he wouldn't feel like a jerk saying anything.

So bottom line is, maybe, as bad as it sucks, this is a blessing. Had I done...WHATEVER to show that other guy he should be with me, my best friend would have never came clean about his feelings (that had been mutual, I just never thought I could have him), and I wouldn't be engaged to my best friend right now, and about to marry him.

I literally look back, and as bad as being rejected the couple times I had been hurt like HECK, I thank God. I think of what my life COULD had been had things worked out with the guys who rejected me, and I know it wouldn't have been as good as it is now.

In a nutchell:
- if he's really worth being with you, he'll realize it without you trying. (oh, btw, that guy now tells his friends he regrets letting me go. :] haha) The kind of person you should be with shouldn't need you to prove or show them you're worth it.
- You'll feel like **** for a while, but time heals it. You'll be feeling good about it, then have a horrible night and feel like you're back at square one, but those moments become fewer and fewer. (Don't force yourself to date if you don't want to. I did that and it was horrible. I did stuff and associated myself with people I never would have normally. It did nothing to better my situation.)
- You have to get rid of some things so you have room for better things.

[jamesmarshalls]

Yes they are right.

[belgar91]

he probably learn something about you he don't like. He like you at first but something came up that change his mind about you and it not hard for that happen. you will never find out why.To guy point view you didn't went that far with him so better luck on your next guy.

[jrosen2]

Thanks for all your advice!!

Now I have a bigger issue.

So school ended for me last week, and my last day of school could have been the last day I'd ever see this guy again. Well, the past few weeks, I've remained quite distant from him. Not flirting with him... I just kept to myself most of the time, and tried not to focus on him. It was hard seeing him at school though.... I really missed how it used to be between us. I was confused as to why our "situation" had to completely ruin our friendship... why does sex make everything so complicated?!

But the last day of school turned out to be good. We were friendly with one another....he flirted A LOT and I of course, fell right into the flirting. I was so scared for the last of school to arrive. It was around 3 and class was almost over. So our class said goodbye to one another and I said bye to the guy. We hugged and he said we should hang out soon. And I said definitely. Now, here are the issues:

1) He really wants to hang out: do I wait for him to make the first move or do I make the first move?
2) If I make the first move, and he does not respond or says no, then I'll be hurt.
3) If either him or I make the first move, and we hang out, and "something" happens again, what do I do?

So either way, I'm screwed.... Help!

I just cannot stop thinking about him. I miss him so much. I'm scared I'll never see him again.... :'(

[notlikethenormal]

If it were me I'd wait for him to make all the moves, and it would still be a long while before I'd have enough trust to actually have sex with him.

Just spend time together having fun, sexual stuff will come after you learn to enjoy each others company.

[jrosen2]

But he hasn't even asked me yet to hang out....

Mind you it's only been a week since school has ended...but still! I'm so impatient!!! I hate waiting around for other people, but I realllly want him to ask me to do something with him.

[notlikethenormal]

I'd wait because he was the one pushing you away to begin with, so in order to not make him feel pressured I wouldn't suggest hanging out.

Maybe a text and just say something like... Hey, how are things? Just to open the lines of communication.