[katzintheclouds]

Hey guys..

I wrote a little bit ago about my impending break-up with a man I'd been with for almost 6 years. Since then as I said in the post, I have broken it off. It was "easier" then I thought it would be, it didn't blow up into a big fight like I had imagined. We both realize I think that we just are becoming two different people. It's so difficult though & I find myself reaching out to every angle I can.

This is the longest relationship I've ever had. I know it's for the best, I don't need to hear how it was the right decision because I know it was. The biggest issue is that our lives were intertwined in so many ways, especially because we lived together & shared the majority of our lives together. Bills, the house, pets, families. I was very close to his entire family, his mom was closer to me then my own mother in so many ways. She was there for me through a lot of tough times. She promises that wont change, that she'll always be there but it's hard to have the same relationship, at least right now.

So right now I'm detached from those people, living on a friends couch (who I'm very grateful for as she's the only support system I have right now here)..everything's just so scattered. How in the world do you get through this & remain strong?

[Bladyn'smommy16]

Wow that's a tuff question
I would say find something like a hobbie or friends to keep your mind off it and I'm sure it will take time but that's really all you can do and if you are depressed then perhaps see a therapist
Sorry I don't know much else to tell you everyone is different with dealing with things.

[Live&Learn]

So sorry to hear this. You were together a long time and made a lot of memories together so it is very hard to get over a relationship. I have been through a tough time too. I lost a man I loved dearly....I did everything for him and was nothing but kind and caring....it just wasn't enough! I found out in the end that he had been lying to me...I was crushed! He played mind games with me and was just using me...he would pull me in and then push me away so many times. He was seeing his ex-partner behind my back...he tossed me out like I was just a piece of rubbish....he ended it with me...it wasn't easy. I lost so much weight through it all plus the day it ended I lost my job! I was renting and I went into panic mode. My emotional state was not good. I almost fell into depression, but I managed to gain strength again...and you will too! It has taken me 8 months to get back to normal and put on some much needed weight. My heart was broken badly and the thought that he only used me for his own selfish purposes disgusted me. I was a fool...I should have known better. There were warning signs but I chose to ignore them and what my family and friends were trying to tell me. When he was around I blocked everyone out of my life because I thought he was all I ever needed! How wrong I was! I too felt detached from everyone and it has taken time to mend some wounds I had created. My advise to you is to keep busy!!!!! Get into some hobbies and create new memories. The old ones will fade in time! You may still want to have a cry...nothing wrong with that! Let it out! You may pass by a restaurant you had both eaten at, and other places you had been together bringing back memories, but it will pass...believe me. Time heals all wounds...I never thought it would, but take it from me, it does!!!! Keep your chin up!

[madlionly]

Keep your mind off what happend and just move on that's all you can do

[time2discover]

Going by my experience, and I'm still living it, you're gonna go through all the motions.
Wanting what was, wondering why, somedays mad and others sad, thinking of all
the things you or he could have done better and on and on and on.

My advice is, the first step is accept that what you're feeling is normal and will go away
eventually. Forget the past more and more every day, and make some steps at planning
your futur. A little a day goes a long way! Believe me when I say it's not easy! I'm still
working every day at climbing the stairs towards "MY" futur. Don't expect this to happen
overnight because it doesn't. But we'll get there.

[jns]

katz, any updates on your breakup?

[Trisha23]

Break-ups do happen in almost every person's life, if not all. Just be with your friends who can support and understand you. And keep yourself busy also so as not to overthink with things that happened.

[Trisha23]

Break-ups do happen in almost every person's life, if not all. Just be with your friends who can support and understand you. And keep yourself busy also so as not to overthink with things that happened.