[Brit0412]

hello, so maybe someone can help me...
ive been with my bF for 3 years come jan 20th.. we most definatly had our ups and downs.. some caused by him some caused by me.. hes 35.. never lived outside his mothers untill this past october when he moved into my house. while i love that hes finall out.. he still uns home to mommy whenever she calls and complans.. which is a HUGE pain in my ****** cuz everytime something goes wrong here throws in my face that he'll just go back to his mothers.. or if im not doingsomething right then he **********es to his mom.. im sorry but i am not his mother and i tell him that point blank. I dont do laundry every day, im not italian (no offense to anyone who is :/) i do not slave over a stove for hours to eat dinner at 8 pm. I was raised to cook efficently and healthy, dinner is 530-6 pm.. i dont like being late to events an things planned with friends yet we always are and he always blames me! BS!! I work nights getting home around 2-230 but (my choice) i get up with the puppy at 630-7 everyday.. make him lunch..which he rarely eats barely nething of.. yet he'll complain how (because of his heart condition he has a stint) he needs to et healthy and exercise.. himm well maybe if u actually ate lunch i send wth u instead of buyng fast food everyday.. or came with me at night when i walk the dog.. i even went as far as payin over 100.00 a month for a 24/7 gym membership for the two of us.. i went religiously for a year.. then slacked off.. he went once.. for 20 minutes... he complains and complains about trivial things like the bed wasnt made or how come im already done cooking? the guy is on his phone 24/7 texting or fb, he works a lot granted and he works hard.. I ask for nething an he forgets.. does he do nething for me? no not unless i beg until it ****es him of or if my car finally snaps an axel will he fix it.. he s such a mamas boy i cant stand it.. granted he has come a very long way since we first started dating.. but im 24.. i have goals and dreams and hopes and i aint getting any younger.. im just tired and dont know what to do anymore.. i get NOO attention.. NO compassion or affection.. we dont have sex.. i think its been about 3-4 months now.. not including my birthday which suckd.. i really think hes clueless as to how to treat someone... it makes me depressed and sad.. it makes me second guess everything i do. how i dress how i look what i do..makes me feel soo dejected.. and the few times ive ried to broach the subject.. he always flips it onto me an says how he soo sorry hes an ************** an mayb if i wasnt such a ********** or blah blah blah why am i always so needed.. things like that.. IM NEEDY CUZ I DONT GET ANYTHNG!!!!!! im loosing my mind i had a great guy once.. he left for boot camp.. his mother was nutz and basically told me i wasnt worthy enough to date her son... so i broke it with him n got back with my now current bf... im soo confused.. i know im tarting to ramble now so ill stop.. if anyone has anyideas on what i can do please please help!!! im all ears!!

[Pollon]

So he's irresponsible, inattentive, immature, disrespectful and uncommitted to you. In addition, it would be easy to kick him out since you live in your own place and he is happy to be at mom's.

Please tell us what is keeping you in this relationship. Surely you can do better than this.

[Harmony]

I was waiting for you to say he's a smoking hot 'gw-ee-to' (that's the phonetic way for how they describe hot Italian men on Jersey Shore) who's keeping you around because of the sex.

It sounds like this guy has issues, there is also (by your own admission) NOTHING in his favor. I would send him back to his moms and start making room in your life for someone with whom you share common goal/s.

Good luck x

[Brit0412]

lol when we did have sex it was good.. and yea guido should be hs middle name.. guy uses enough hairgel for a week in day.. *pollon i dont know what keeps me around.. this past year we "broke up" 4 times twice my own doin twice his doing... everytime only lasted a couple weeks.. sigh.. no will power? low self esteem.. zero self confidence.. maybe.. i dunno... things go really well for awhile but then they taper off again... i cant say its all bad.. we dont neccessarily fight or argue much its just frustrating most days...ugh

[Pollon]

First get him out of your house. Then, if he has access to your social media, email, etc, change our passwords. Then just try joining any dating site and see what happens. Don't pursue anything seriously, but flirt a little to start getting your confidence back. As the guys begin to bite, go very slow and be very picky. Make sure they are decent guys who haven't left a trail of broken relationships and abandoned children, who have a decent job and live on their own.

You can do this and you deserve better then Guido.

Good luck

[Brit0412]

he does but doesnt have access to my social media.. no fb access, if he actually remembered things he might b able to access email n such... but he cant even remember his own mothers bday...the problem comes from the entire group of friends we have... we've all been friends since before him an i dated he an i never really knew one another till he randomly came into my work one day.. this entire past year we've been on an off mostly lso because he travels for work.. hes a motorcycle mechanic and they go to all the bike weeks on the east coast and some out west lil ways.. hell be home one week then gone the next... gone for a month then home for 5 days... its rough.. we've tried working it out and everytime it always seems to be me getting left in the dust by our 'friends" . there are a couple that would still call n wed all go riding together.. just sucks when i feel like im losing all my friends doesnt help the situation either..
ive given this a deadling.. either he straightens up by february or hes goin back home.. im nobodys mother.. and dont wnat to be treated the way i have been for the past year.. thanks or the advice!!

[Trisha23]

Guys like that are really hard to deal with. They always have the tendency to look for their moms even with the slightest problems they may deal. Better talk to him regarding that attitude and tell him frankly that you cannot put his mom at the center of your relationship.

[jns]

More about this OP at: https://www.womens-health.com/boards...ct-months.html Brit, has anything changed since you started these threads?