[airplane]

Hello Everyone!

I am new here, and perhaps like most people else here, I want an honest answer without the risk of being judged by friends.

I've been with my bf for 1 yr and a half. Its been 6 months side we started doing long distance relationship. I visit him 3-4 times in a month. Everything seems fine when we are together, except that we don't have sex. And whenever we are not together, he doesn't pay attention to me when we are on video calls. Then half way throughout the call he'll say he needs to hang up for a bit to concentrate on something. Or he'll say stuff like, I'm really angry right now, its probably best that we don't talk tonight (not because we had an argument but because he said his watch is broken). Then tonight he suddenly started talking about how he wanted to deactivate his Facebook and instagram because he hates how narcissistic people are.

Is he doing that so that i won't see what he is up to? I need an honest answer. I don't think its normal to have sex once or not even once in one month. And its been going on for ages!

[rcoreyus]

Some people only want sex once a month or less, but most want it much more frequently. What does he say if you try to start intimacy with him? Did you ahve a more active sex life before you were living far apart?

How is the relationship otherwise. If you aren't happy with him, then it doesn't mater if something is going on, you should leave anyway. If you are happy, then its worth trying to understand what is going on.

[jen1447]

Hi airplane,

While I can't say for sure what the problem or problems might be, what I can say with a fair amount of certainty is that if your intuition is telling you that something's wrong, it's probably right. Usually when women 'sense' that something's up, it's not for no good reason. Lots of non-verbal and even semi-conscious cues go into forming our intuition, so it's best that we listen to it.

Have you been blunt and asked him what the problem is?

[atskitty2]

I agree with jen. You don't say specifically what your gut is telling you but chances are, it's onto something.
There could be reasonable answers to these changes, especially if it's changed since the distance came between you, but you wont know unless you have a sit down, honest and blunt discussion, at a time when you aren't upset and can discuss it without the strong emotions getting involved.

[Sehnora]

ALWAYS trust your instincts.

and yes, not having sex means something is wrong somewhere.