[CHANDLERS WISH]

I don't know mrschrisco2, I don't think ultimatives work very well...

If you do this, then I'll do that...

Your asking him to stop something you don't like, to you but to everyone else, he is allowed to lie to, a therapist wouldn't possilbly be able to work with that, does that make sense?

How about you tell him that he has no reason to ever lie to you, you will always talk about things, never get mad, or jealous, or see it as jealousy as you 100 percent trust him, love him and the only way to have a beautiful marriage, is with honesty, trust..

But then you have to "stick to it" you can't get mad, or jealous you have to calmly discuss things if from what he ever tells you, you don't like.

That's my opinion, as altamatives are dangerous....

[mrs.chrisco2]

i know it doesnt make any sense i was just tryin to get him to see my point i know it sounds silly and the whole you do this ill do that thing is something that im pretty sure will work because.....i found out about a lie an just got up an walked away from him an it tore him apart. So im just trying to open his eyes an i know that is one way to do it!!!!! Its hard to explain i guess....its one of those things where you just know lol

[hizenberg]

white lies?? arent realy ok but i admit to have saying white lies to save having to explain myself example,i was once asked by my ex if dinner was good?am no it wasnt!! lol he had merley cooked the steak and it still had blood runnig out, lol i couldnt break his big smile and look of accomplishment. sounds like he has said the thing about his birth to impress you i guess,but thats dumb as you have caught him out on so many lies.Many people lie or 'exaggerate' small minor things .are there any major lies he has come out with??

[mrs.chrisco2]

no nothing relly major all just little ones!! Bu we just had annother really long heart to heart an things are REALLY lookin up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[CHANDLERS WISH]

no nothing relly major all just little ones!! Bu we just had annother really long heart to heart an things are REALLY lookin up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you have to calmly discuss things if from what he ever tells you, you don't like.

See how that's better than making rules, one for you one for them? I do know what you are referring to above, it's kind of a let out clause, but seriously, trust me, discussing calmly and taking about things and working on them is your better solution..

[mrs.chrisco2]

Yes CW that is so much better it really helped us!!! A friend of urs ha helped us out too!!! We Were refered to a book called "Laugh Your Way To A Better Marriage" By: Mark Gungor!!! I have only read the first chapter and its really good my husban and i are gonna go through he book together!!!!!

[Casey715]

I was like that when I was younger. I would lie just to..........lie. I grew out of it I guess. Now, I hate it when other people lie to me.