[Hopeless Dork]

You say you want be healthy, you want to be a better person, you want to be a good role model for your son... what is stopping you from going after all those goals? You can't allow him to get you off track, and no offense, but that is making him the scapegoat for why you don't accomplish what you want to. The blame game. Don't let his lack of motivation become an excuse for you to have no motivation. Instead, hold tight to your goals, push for them. You want to volunteer, do it! Exercise? Do it! Eat healthier, do it! Lead by example, or do for yourself and let him either jump on board or be the odd man out eating fries in teh living room while you and your son are eating healthy salads at the table. He may very well become inspired by you and the light you shine.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I do think this has to do with you.

Your dreams goals, that you had for yourself "before" you got pregnant and now you are dependant on your husband's income and now those dreams "for now" are gone, you are home, alone and tending to a baby.

Can you do an on-line course in the direction that you wanted to take? Babys are only babys for so long, day care you may be able to accept even though you will miss him in a few years time.

And, you need to get out and not be stuck at home all the time..

You are resenting him because you fell pregnant and can't have that career "yet".. He's working night shift for you and the baby, his baby, his wife and if not, he's deployed..It's tough as you don't really have time together but you have to work that out too, to make "me" time

Where do your parents/ his parents live? Surely you can work something out there.

[oxy-moron]

I have to agree with HD and CW - It sounds like your current situation is dragging you down but you need to make the most of it.
You need to rebuild your life and become a better person. Your man is just a man - he will have his pluses and his minuses bit it sounds like his pluses make him a good dad.
Get back into physical touch with him and see how things go. Start massage sessions with him.
Lead by example as HD said.