[elenor19]

Thanks so much for all your support and listening to me. I have to wait at least till this weekend to talk to him. MamaMicah, loved your post. It cheered me up, just imagining indulging myself! You are right Crystalblue...it is really maddening, all this wait. But I am also hoping that this will give me enough time to gather my thoughts and have a calm, rational conversation with him, without any histrionics. I really don't believe in divorce, and am willing to do whatever is needed from my side, as the cliche goes, it needs two hand to clap!

[Ashlee T.]

I just think when someone shows you over and over who they are, it's time to start believing them.

Your children deserve better than that. You deserve better than that. But if you've gotten it in your head that you're not leaving no matter what, then you better buckle in because it's going to be a long, emotional, drama filled, jealousy filled, frustrating, deceitful ride. It is UNACCEPTABLE to be 80%. Turn the tables, we make excuses for men behaving like this, but what if it were you? What if you had carried on with an affair all this time? What if you had said the things he said on skype? Would he still be hanging around because "marriage is forever " ? Some STD's are forever. Mental scarring from being cheated on is forever. Low self esteem from feeling like you're "not enough" can be forever. These are ways in which he is permanently affecting your life and the lives of your children through nothing but pure selfishness.

[Pringles]

emotional affair or not?

Hi there!

I am in need of help...My husband has a friend since college, who happens to be a girl..They have met before we did..They have been friends for almost 10 years now, but their way of communicating is only through "texting." In the years that we have been married almost 5 years now..they have been texting occasionally..However, just recently, when my husband got sick of depression, and they were able to communicate regularly, everyday that is..he said, she was really a big help for his recovery...It pains me to admit that and it hurts me whenever I see him texting her..But what can I do, if she really is helping him cope with his illness..I asked him many times, if he has a feelings for her, and he told me, that there is none..only that they are friends..The girl happens to have her own family already but sometimes she shares marital problems with him too..My question is...are they having an emotional affair?? Since they both says that they are just "friends" and my husband doesn't know anything about this term "emotional affair" should I give him that idea? pls..help.. thanks..

[oxy-moron]

Pringles
Possibly if it is a long standing friendship you may have to think about giving him slack.
To start with, he could have had a sexual relationship with her before you came along if there had been a spark there.
Does he keep his phone locked? Does he chat openly about her?

[Pringles]

Thanks so much for your response..I really appreciate it..

I believe he did not have any sexual relationship with her..Because they never reached the point in their friendship that they were a couple, according to them, it was just a "mutual understanding" but they did not reach the point were they become lovers..For him, as he told me, it's purely friendship..it just happened that she is a woman..Before I used to read their text messages and there is nothing about their feelings for each other..It's all about their every day living, the girl particularly shares her everyday activity to him, in which he just responds to it..Another problem is that he is ill with depression, and she became the one main "help" for him to recover..and since I have shown him my dislike of the situation, he started to have relapse, and he is depressed again..

Before, he tells me what they are talking about, even reads to me their conversation...but since I have shown him that I did not like the situation, he seldom tells me what they are talking about lately...

Can pure friendship exist between a boy and a girl?

[oxy-moron]

I still have female friends I havent slept with- I think that If I had slept with them it would have broken the friendships.
Not that it is a guarantee of any sort
His depression would not have been caused by your behaviour.
There have been been may trials that tie depression to diet and to Trans fats and lack of Omega3 Fats .
A large trial in Spain showed that the onset of depression was related to the level of Trans Fats in the diet. These are the fats that have been banned in New York because they cause health problems.
Omega3 fats like those found in fish oil have been proven to help fight depression.
Good luck