would it be so bad...
if we didn't invite my fiance's father (my future father-in-law) to our wedding reception/party?
My fiance and I having a courthouse ceremony in the summer time and the following weekend, we are having a reception/party at our house for our friends and family (since court house limit the number of guests).
I have posted before about his father. We lived with him for four years to take care of him because he is mentally just gone. He's had a couple of strokes, suffers from psychosis, depression, and kleptomania (the inability to refrain from stealing things). He won't take his medication. We have since moved out because he was getting to be too much for us to handle. He really needs to be in assisted living but the power of attorney (my fiance's grandmother) refuses to get him more help and is living in a dreamland that one day he will wake up and just be normal again. As heartless as this might sound, the man is absolutely disgusting. He has ZERO personal hygiene skills. In the four years we lived there, he showered less than ten times. He never washes his hands, he eats rotten moldy food from the trashcan, he brought him trash everyday and hoards it, etc. The thing that bothered me the most was his klepto. When we lived there, we had to lock up EVERYTHING of ours or he would steal it. Make up, clothes, food, shoes (yes), our dog's toys, tools, you name it. If it was left out, it would guarantee we would never see it again. He stole other people's things too - he has drawer fulls of cell phones, sunglasses, Ipods, a few wallets, etc...
The problem I have with him coming to our home for our wedding reception is that I do not want to babysit him. I do not want to have to worry about our personal things as well as our guests because of one man. The fact that he never showers or washes his hands really bothers me - I don't want him touching the food and serving utinsels. He eats like a pig - he is skinny as a rail - but since we are having our party catered, we cant afford for him to eat enough for six or seven people - which he does at every family gathering.
I do not mind him coming to our ceremony, but I do not want him in our home. I do not want to have to lock up our guest's things, and even if the guest belongings were locked up, he would still have access to other rooms in the house or cell phones or whatever else he could find. I just do not want the stress of it. We can talk to his power of attorney about it - the main caretaker of him - but in the past when we've tried talking to her about him, she gets extremely defensive and irritable.
Any suggestions????
He is divorced. I am very close to his ex-wife (my future mother-in-law) and her husband of five years. We might talk to them about it and see what they suggest since they are still very much involved in his life.
My fiance and I having a courthouse ceremony in the summer time and the following weekend, we are having a reception/party at our house for our friends and family (since court house limit the number of guests).
I have posted before about his father. We lived with him for four years to take care of him because he is mentally just gone. He's had a couple of strokes, suffers from psychosis, depression, and kleptomania (the inability to refrain from stealing things). He won't take his medication. We have since moved out because he was getting to be too much for us to handle. He really needs to be in assisted living but the power of attorney (my fiance's grandmother) refuses to get him more help and is living in a dreamland that one day he will wake up and just be normal again. As heartless as this might sound, the man is absolutely disgusting. He has ZERO personal hygiene skills. In the four years we lived there, he showered less than ten times. He never washes his hands, he eats rotten moldy food from the trashcan, he brought him trash everyday and hoards it, etc. The thing that bothered me the most was his klepto. When we lived there, we had to lock up EVERYTHING of ours or he would steal it. Make up, clothes, food, shoes (yes), our dog's toys, tools, you name it. If it was left out, it would guarantee we would never see it again. He stole other people's things too - he has drawer fulls of cell phones, sunglasses, Ipods, a few wallets, etc...
The problem I have with him coming to our home for our wedding reception is that I do not want to babysit him. I do not want to have to worry about our personal things as well as our guests because of one man. The fact that he never showers or washes his hands really bothers me - I don't want him touching the food and serving utinsels. He eats like a pig - he is skinny as a rail - but since we are having our party catered, we cant afford for him to eat enough for six or seven people - which he does at every family gathering.
I do not mind him coming to our ceremony, but I do not want him in our home. I do not want to have to lock up our guest's things, and even if the guest belongings were locked up, he would still have access to other rooms in the house or cell phones or whatever else he could find. I just do not want the stress of it. We can talk to his power of attorney about it - the main caretaker of him - but in the past when we've tried talking to her about him, she gets extremely defensive and irritable.
Any suggestions????
He is divorced. I am very close to his ex-wife (my future mother-in-law) and her husband of five years. We might talk to them about it and see what they suggest since they are still very much involved in his life.
)..
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