Hi jns!
Married life is fabulous. It is so much better than I could have ever imagined. I was very afraid that it wouldn't feel very different from being engaged and that we would just be "legal on paper" but it feels so much better than that. I can't explain it, but I love it. Because we had such a small ceremony with only immediate family, we are having a reception this weekend for friends (and extended family). We are really excited!
A lot has happened with my parents: They found out about the wedding and were mad that they did not get an invite, so I wrote to them reminding them that they had made it very clear over and over that they did not want one. I told them I would've loved to send them one ,but I was trying to respect their wishes and not rub it in their face. I think that they were mad because all of the other family got one and them not receiving one just made them "look bad." I apologized and told them that now that I was married and not living in "sin" (they believed my fiance and I living together before marriage was a sin and therefore could not support us) that we could move and work to reconcile our relationship. Well, they wrote back angrily and listed all the reasons why we can't have a relationship and that I am a dishonor and embarrassment to the family and I make them look bad. They said that I chose to live in "sin" for so long that it defies the Biblical principles they raised me with and therefore there is no way I could be a Christian, and that they can't associate with me because of it until I "repent." My parents follow a very rigid set of Biblical rules and they will cut people out of their lives "in the name of the Lord." I have heard rumors from people saying that my parents tell people I sleep around and have had multiple pregnancies and possibly a few abortions. Nothing could be further than the truth. I was a virgin until I met my (now) husband and he is the only man I have ever been with sexually. We have also never been pregnant, so certainly no abortions. I am not the first person to be cut. So I wrote them back and told them that this communication is not healthy for us. and that I have nothing to repent for. I told them that I need to focus on my new life and my new husband now and that I can't focus on their drama. I told them I am extremely proud of my life and where I have gotten with hard work. I told them that if they ever come to a point in their life that they can accept me and my husband where we are at without their stipulations, then a relationship will be more than welcomed. But that until then, communication is cut off because I need to protect my heart from their hurt. I emailed the letter and then shut down that email address so they could not reply to me. I just do not need to hear or see their hurtful words anymore. I need to focus on this new, beautiful chapter in my life and if they do not want to be a part of it because of their Biblical rules and regulations, then that is their choice/loss.
So....in a nutshell.... they are not taking it well.
But I am grateful for all of the love and support we have received from my extended family and all of our friends and even people that we do not know in person (like this forum!) We are very loved and we have many people who love us for who we are, not what we do.
Married life is fabulous. It is so much better than I could have ever imagined. I was very afraid that it wouldn't feel very different from being engaged and that we would just be "legal on paper" but it feels so much better than that. I can't explain it, but I love it. Because we had such a small ceremony with only immediate family, we are having a reception this weekend for friends (and extended family). We are really excited!
A lot has happened with my parents: They found out about the wedding and were mad that they did not get an invite, so I wrote to them reminding them that they had made it very clear over and over that they did not want one. I told them I would've loved to send them one ,but I was trying to respect their wishes and not rub it in their face. I think that they were mad because all of the other family got one and them not receiving one just made them "look bad." I apologized and told them that now that I was married and not living in "sin" (they believed my fiance and I living together before marriage was a sin and therefore could not support us) that we could move and work to reconcile our relationship. Well, they wrote back angrily and listed all the reasons why we can't have a relationship and that I am a dishonor and embarrassment to the family and I make them look bad. They said that I chose to live in "sin" for so long that it defies the Biblical principles they raised me with and therefore there is no way I could be a Christian, and that they can't associate with me because of it until I "repent." My parents follow a very rigid set of Biblical rules and they will cut people out of their lives "in the name of the Lord." I have heard rumors from people saying that my parents tell people I sleep around and have had multiple pregnancies and possibly a few abortions. Nothing could be further than the truth. I was a virgin until I met my (now) husband and he is the only man I have ever been with sexually. We have also never been pregnant, so certainly no abortions. I am not the first person to be cut. So I wrote them back and told them that this communication is not healthy for us. and that I have nothing to repent for. I told them that I need to focus on my new life and my new husband now and that I can't focus on their drama. I told them I am extremely proud of my life and where I have gotten with hard work. I told them that if they ever come to a point in their life that they can accept me and my husband where we are at without their stipulations, then a relationship will be more than welcomed. But that until then, communication is cut off because I need to protect my heart from their hurt. I emailed the letter and then shut down that email address so they could not reply to me. I just do not need to hear or see their hurtful words anymore. I need to focus on this new, beautiful chapter in my life and if they do not want to be a part of it because of their Biblical rules and regulations, then that is their choice/loss.
So....in a nutshell.... they are not taking it well.
But I am grateful for all of the love and support we have received from my extended family and all of our friends and even people that we do not know in person (like this forum!) We are very loved and we have many people who love us for who we are, not what we do.
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