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What are you gonna do if you've a SO like mine ?

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  • What are you gonna do if you've a SO like mine ?

    Some of you or even most of you may know how to read body languages. I.e, when someone hand reaching the door knob , you can tell that person is wanting to leave. ; when someone constantly checking their watch even though you are still talking to them enthusiastically which mean that person probably wanting to do something else or etc .
    Here is my SO, from day 1 that Ive known him, he can't read body languages. He won't stop talking ( oh my, once he talks, is non stop, is unbelievable how much he can have so many topics / stories to say), so he will absolutely ignore or not notice that the other person is no longer interested of talking / listening, a lot of time I've to do something to let him aware of the situations.

    This issue,the fail of reading body languages, I've never thought would actually become a problem in our relationship.

    Couple weeks ago, our kids were not home as they had sleep over at their cousins'. So only the 2 of us in the house, I thought that's perfect, that night, I put on that sexy sleeveless leopard prints pj dress with the matching panty. That was all I have walking into the living room of where my HB was sitting.well I didn't sit right next to him but he didn't barge either. Later, I brought him a bottle of massage oil and pull up my dress behind me and told him to give me a massage. All that he did was rubbing my shoulder blade where I complaint of sore for 5-10 min then nothing else happen. Seriously?? I thought I've shown so much of me being horny that I've never done before as kids were always home. plus we were watching an R rated movie !!! Won't that turn any man on?

    So I should actually say to my thick HB ," I'm horny right now, rub here, let's make love in the living room, etc etc...." I think with this Hb I've , I have to instruct him what to do about everything including intimacy,that just frustrates me . Is like teaching a grown man with that annoying innocent face what to do.

  • You knew about this trait from day one and married him (I assume since the reference went from SO to HB). You did not say how your sex life was before this incident -- it may help with our responses. However, it seems you have additional work to do teacher.

    The only way to fix things is through communication. I would suggest a conversation that would begin at why he did not understand that the sexy outfit and massage oil were intended to start an intimate encounter. The second issue would be a mutual understanding how not to let this happen again. Perhaps instead of symbols you might schedule a sex night. The sexy outfit might then sink in that the next move is his. I get that oblivious people are difficult because subtleness is not understood, but your job is to focus him on your needs in a more obvious way.
    "The only consistent feature of all of your dissatisfying relationships is you." Despair.com "Dysfunction"

    Comment


    • Originally posted by effy2014 View Post
      You knew about this trait from day one and married him (I assume since the reference went from SO to HB).
      I think you assumed wrong on this one effy. It seems that on this forum, "H" denotes husband, as we often see DH, which, no doubt, means "dumb husband". It could mean "dear husband", "dreaded husband" or quite a few other things, none of which seem likely.

      While HB could be referring to a pencil, here I read it, in context, to mean "hopeless boor".
      I do not grow old; if I stop growing, I am old.

      Comment


      • Originally posted by Baboy View Post

        While HB could be referring to a pencil, here I read it, in context, to mean "hopeless boor".
        ROTFLMAO
        "The only consistent feature of all of your dissatisfying relationships is you." Despair.com "Dysfunction"

        Comment


        • Originally posted by Baboy View Post
          While HB could be referring to a pencil, here I read it, in context, to mean "hopeless boor".
          .....

          Comment


          • Thank you Findinglucky for taking my puerile diversion in good humor. I cannot come up with anything more constructive to say that effy did not say already.

            I hope your next overture to your guy will render him an HB - horny beast.
            I do not grow old; if I stop growing, I am old.

            Comment


            • Originally posted by Baboy View Post
              Thank you Findinglucky for taking my puerile diversion in good humor. I cannot come up with anything more constructive to say that effy did not say already.

              I hope your next overture to your guy will render him an HB - horny beast.
              OMG !! You're darn good with words !!
              This HB of mine is in his 50s while I'm in my late 30s, I constantly don't see why I should be the one behaving his mom / teacher while the vice versa should happen. Many times I told him I didn't chose to marry a 15 years older man for nothing. Today I think I have married a 15 years younger (mentally) man instead...
              Life is always challenging...if one has no problem now but problems sure come later.
              Last weekend we met up with this long lost old friend of in her early 40s ,broke up with her long term bf a while back and still single , how I want to tell her," you lucky bxxch."...

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              • There is a similar age difference between me and my husband. When we started dating, he said he was 12. I think I let him graduate to 13 one year, but that is about as far as it has gotten. If anything, I think men become more juvenile as they age. The only difference is that they have the money to buy more expensive toys now. Alas, I think you just need to spell it out for him "I want sex." Maybe write is on some posters and hold it up.
                Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose - Kris Kristofferson and Fred Foster (sung by Janis Joplin)

                Comment


                • Originally posted by DreamP346 View Post
                  There is a similar age difference between me and my husband. When we started dating, he said he was 12. I think I let him graduate to 13 one year, but that is about as far as it has gotten. If anything, I think men become more juvenile as they age. The only difference is that they have the money to buy more expensive toys now. Alas, I think you just need to spell it out for him "I want sex." Maybe write is on some posters and hold it up.
                  Ah ha ha.... That was funny ....you know my HB won't notice the poster either ....

                  Comment


                  • Imagine. Body Language over the Internet. Well at least that's what the boys just created for you Well I never!!!

                    Ah I remember putting on more than you did, like really going to town, including earrings, hair done, not sure if I put high heels on, long blonde hair, walked out, he looked at me and that's it, turned back to the TV, like WT? "Sorry, I'm not in the mood" was his answer. WT?

                    Turns out he's my ex now His thoughts as I later established were all women were ......s so you know, dressing up for him was a turn off, not on.

                    My fiancé loved/loves it when I feel in the mood to do that.

                    IDK, TH comes to mind, thick husband and not the way you are thinking : )

                    Yep, you are going to have to spell it out to him. You're in your prime, at 40 you are going to go mad for more sex, he'll be 60 so you better start teaching him and hope that he then leads from there.
                    PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

                    Comment

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