[pamelahaze]

What an awful year. I left the job I had for 10 years because the owner decided to sell one of the motels I managed. I went to another town and left him (husband) behind to go try to get a better life for us started. We had been together 10 years. NO sexual problems. I had NO CLUE what he was doing. 10 weeks into my new job (which was NOT going well) he shows up at my job to announce he had been reported for inappropriately touching a black female on the job (we are white). This was my former employee of 8 years. When I pulled the cell phone records a different picture was painted. They were both calling one another. What an idiot I was! He did not call me even once from May 30th till August 1st when he announced his wrong doing. Not one single call to his wife. Of course we were talking...but it was always initiated by me. The lady.... not even pretty. Husband said he just wanted to see a black lady naked.... made a 'mistake'. I said a mistake happens once....possibly twice. This going on for 2 months was definitely not a mistake, it was a choice.

Well.... I am still with him. I have put my house on the market, changed jobs again and have moved into the motel I manage with a plan. It will take us 1 year to pay off ALL my debt and I can begin life again. I still enjoy spending time with this idiot but am sure I will never trust him again.

I am looking for a new good friend who is willing to help me test this jerk online and see if he will take the bait. I just need to know once and for all that he will indeed do it again if given opportunity. Then I can proceed with my plan without feeling like he may have been good forever.

Email me if you're interested in being my partner in online chat.

Pamela

[LadyLane]

I think if you need to go to those lengths then its better off to break it off. He's showing you right now who he is, and you don't want to see it.

If you're intent on going through with it, I think you can check online, there are women PI's who do this for married women, act like bait and see if he's willing to get caught.

[alibaby]

Seems like you're looking for a reason to get out of your marriage, because trying to baite your husband won't make things better. You already know that you don't trust him. He cheated on you, so I don't blame you. If that's the case, why waste time looking for a complete stranger to help you trick him? Don't let him stand in the way of that better life that you're hoping for...get rid of him and move on.

[getfitgirl25]

Sadly....

I have been there.....several times with my fiance. Honestly...its doen't help to have it spelled out for you, and chances are you won't leave anyways, why intentionally hurt yourself. You have to decide...

Am i REALLY going to leave!? Or will I allow him to lie and rationalize, and will I make excuses for him!?

or

Do I tell him I am NOT playing this game anymore, regardless of any situation you deserve to be with a faithful man, someone who loves you and is devoted to you! tell him, you have 1 chance, you blow it, thats it no questions or comments, we're through!

I chose #2, it's been 2 years and counting since he's been "retarded" but, i'll promise you this...if it occurs again...there are no more chances left! I chalked up the past to being young, dumb and having the need to sow wild oats!

My insecurities allowed him to play me! My strength allows him to be faithful! Hope this helps!