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Your shoe shopping and your Husband

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  • Your shoe shopping and your Husband

    Be sure to read my other posts on fetish understanding and submissive understanding

    Do you have a love for Shoes Heels pumps and Boots like I do ?
    If your answer was yes You may have a shoe fetish!
    I am sure you have this love. I just love shoes I always have, the colors the styles. I love nothing better than going out shoe shopping. I love looking down at my feet and seeing the pretty shoes I am wearing. It's a great feeling and a visual pleasure! When I snag a great deal on a pair I love its almost orgasmic! However many women especially married women have spoken with me about husbands who complain about the quantity and even the cost of the shoe collections. I was once among this crowd. The average man just don't appreciate us wearing them or even understand out desire for shoes. This is our own fault and I will explain why. After all do we complain about the amount of fishing poles he has? ........Well ----- I am sure we have. Many Husbands and boyfriends also have this same fetish but are somewhat ashamed to admit it. Some will even complain about not only the cost of our shoe collection but the amount we have. Are you in this situation? I have been especially when my husband found out the price of my Cristian Louboutin's ! only one pair. The rest of mine were just regular 19.95 to 75.00 shoes. As a life coach I already knew about shoe fetish but I had to figure out why my shoes even mattered to my husband. And I will explain why they complain or is not happy about your collection. You will learn how to get him to Love your shoes and even offer to buy your more!

    First lets understand what your shoes say about you to men .

    How a man actually feels about your shoes !
    This actually began for me one night when my husband asked me to put my shoes on in bed. My first thought was Preposterous what for? I thought. No need for that!. However two evenings later He asked again and I declined. Especially since in the past he has complained I have to many and said he felt some are to high for work. As a life coach I felt a need to research the connection men have with women's shoes.

    For some reason wearing heels or boots is guaranteed to turn all men on. Especially in the bedroom. I’'m not just guessing at this. I have spoke to men and researched through many online forums, chat sites , professional escorts and even phone sex operators as well as actual shoe sales people. The verdict is that every single man has confessed with a drooling response about the thought of high heels in bed. From the most dominant male to the most submissive male. Submissive men had a harder time fessing up. The truth is men love our shoes.

    Men associate our shoes with sex period. No matter If the heels are high glossy exposed toe or not. Boots especially !! and different shoes have different meanings to men. Men also make a-lot of assumptions about us based on our foot wear. Other married men and yes even Mr. John Q conservative is looking at your shoes and having his own thoughts! And you would not believe what he is thinking!

    I considered most of my shoe collection either formal wear or working shoes. I had not really ever put much thought into what others my think of my foot wear. If they appealed to me I bought them. I will admit I like some of the attention they bring. So I started really paying attention. As it turned out I began to notice most men look at my feet first then work there way up . I noticed I receive much more attention if I had heels on my feet than if I had on some plain tennis shoes. I also realized if I walked into a quiet place the noise of my shoes would get me noticed. In-fact I even watched a women punch a mans arm because he was ogling my 5 inch bright red pumps ( which I was only wearing these for experimentation )

    What men see in your shoes even when you think they don't notice

    First of all nothing makes a man jump out of his seat more than the controlling sound of heels clacking across a hard office floor ! Men have a lot of deep seated silly fantasies especially involving sexy shoes. This is not just some men , Its 90 percent. Some of them have a fetish for women's feet and sexy heels while others love the look and power. And there are many straight heterosexual submissive males who have even deeper desires of powerful women in heels.

    Some of the thoughts :

    Black knee high boots or black solid pump - He sees a powerful Mistress that will take control of him.
    Tall high gloss patent heels - He is thinking of a knock me over and do me escort , dancer.
    Conservative 3 inch pump-He see's a professional sex crazed female boss or a cheating secretary.
    Open toe heeled sandals or sling backs - He sees a saucy tease of a women who just wants a reaction from men.
    Flats - He see's a conservative married lady who is only focused on herself
    Men's style boots - He see's a all around fun girl who is willing to try anything once

    The list goes on ladies ! I do not agree with this however I understand why they think this way. And to be honest we all know different shoes bring us different levels of feelings when we wear them from powerful and sexy to submissive and even feminine. I have learned the way not only acquire more shoes but to even have him pay for them with a smile . It may seem a bit different but it is very very effective and will not only spice up your nights it will size up your collection!

    I have done this myself and I find it fun and a bit exciting.

    Whether you are naked in the bedroom or dressed for business in the office, women in the highest heels get the most attention from men. Men are turned on by a woman in heels. We all secretly know this and this is why we like them ourselves. Deny, if you like truth be told you wear them to be sexy. You wear them because they are sexy, They enhance your look. We all know 5 inch pumps, tall glitter heels, open toe heels and sandals are not exactly a work environment shoe. Your exposed feet and toes should be covered no matter how cute your pedicure may be. Exposed toes and big glitter heels dance off the light and grab attention. The only reason some are getting away with it is that in today's society employers have to be really careful not to say anything incriminating. As it could even be called discrimination and so on. So women are taking advantage of this. Naturally we have to compete with the other women next to us. Sort of like a private silent sword fight. Some of us also believe we can benefit from wearing them in the work place. This is why we even torture ourselves wearing them.

    Why shoes turn men on
    Because it reminds him of his deepest secret fantasies. Also shoes have become somewhat of a competition with other female workers. This also provides men with a variety to ogle over. A man thinks about an encounter with the strict librarian or his Boss or even his secretary ,The girl next door or Totally being Pushed into submission by a hot dominatrix, a even an encounter with a high-class escort ! High heels convert erotic moments to men.. Reality of it is if this were not true why are there so many colors and prints sizes and super glossy patents .

    For many men the fantasy of a women in Heels is the most erotic moments of their life! So many men I have spoke with would love to be pushed into submission by a hot heel wearing mistress. However many of these men are married and have no idea how to even bring this to the partners attention. There is even a fetish called trampling this is where a man loves a women to walk on him in her heels.

    Some of the most manly of men I have spoke with confess to dreaming about coming home from work only to be forced into submission by the wife. Many of them have fantasies of submission to a female and even being forced to wear a pair or pink panties and heels themselves! Yes top lawyers, business men and even law enforcement officers have confessed to seeking out a professional dominatrix for this very type of encounter. Someone to put them in their place so to speak. Even if just for an hour or so as Mistress watches. Remember Heidi Fliess? her biggest repertoire was dominatrix style escorts. Heels to men is sex . What is a exotic dancers hottest part of her out fit -The Shoes. I never new there were so many dominatrix style escorts available for this type of encounter. Some of these ladies earn up to and even above 500.00 per hour to provide this type of service.

    You already know some one who does this

    We all know someone as a child, teen or even a man who has been caught trying on a pair of heels or even walking around in them. They may have acted if it was a joke or just curiosity. No matter how this person played it off. He had a desire to put them on! as well as a desire for someone to see him in them. Many still have that desire! Thousands of men admit that surrendering to a women is a huge fantasy and would love to be able to confess about it to the partner. Many of them just don't know how to express this side. Many are afraid that it will harm the relationship so they actually pay a professional to experience this. Men in high stress jobs such as police, lawyers, executives confess a need to submit to a strong women to help balance out their lives.

    Sex for Women is more about an emotional state. For men it’s all about creating an image in their mind and vision in the eye. Like when you show up in sexy high heels. They notice and start to feel some of their fantasies coming back. Toss on a pair of thigh highs as an extra boost and watch how he gets so turned on. He’ll want to tear your clothes off right then or take orders from you like a naughty child. It just depends on which shoes or boots you walked in the room with .You add in some dirty talk to him to that whole image and suddenly you’ll take him to another world. You will being bringing him what he has thought about since his childhood.

    Taking control of him and your Situation:

    There are two ways to go about this :
    1) Include your shoes in your sex life ( Yes wear them for him.) After all if you were out on a date with a new man would you not have your sexiest pumps on ? I know I would.

    2) Actually have him wear some pumps for you ( no Its not as silly as it may sound ) This is a gift a submissive man dreams of
    This will prove to be more rewarding than you ever imagined!

    Testing the waters !
    Experiment a little just to see for yourself. One evening while he is sitting around like a couch potato walk in the room with sexy heels on and sit next to him and put those heels in his lap and ask him the rub the top of your feet. Ask him if he likes your shoes. Ask him if they look sexy . Ask him to take one off and rub your foot for you. What you will find out is you just turned him on in more ways than he will admit. If he has ever even mentioned your shoes chances are he likes you wearing them and possibly more. If it had no effect on him he is most likely pre occupied. Very possibly has very low interest for you or sex.

    What exactly is a submissive man ?

    When some women think of a man who's aroused by dominant women, chances are you think of a meek, awkward, beta male who will go to embarrassing lengths to please you. That is not the truth in reality, a submissive male who is into shoes, feet and submission play is more likely to be a fit, confident and a successful professional (think: corporate executive, doctor, or attorney even a police officer ) A snazzy dresser who talks about clothes and appearance, a believer in the clothes make the man. It may shock you to know how many Big lawyers often wear pantyhose or stockings with garter belts under their suits during big cases or meetings as way to take the edge off. They claim its like side distraction that keeps them alert and on their game. A submissive husband is normally only submissive to you! He would never let anyone on the outside in on his desires. He also would never back down from a situation that would possibly scare average Joe away. Outside of the home is a regular mans man ! Submitting to a dominant female gives him an outlet and a break from it all. Much like a alcoholic needs his or her booze. Or female shops!

    Not all submissive men are into Shoes, foot worship and sissy play. The meek awkward guys are the ones who are into are into things like physical torture , trampling , cbt torture , candle wax. Some submissive men actually want a women to over power them and beat them up. I am only going to talk about the more sensual of them all and what I believe is the mildest of all the fetishes. Foot and shoe worship and role playing or sissy play.

    Foot Worship
    Is there anything more subservient than an adoring partner kissing or licking your shoes? No! Weather a sub likes your shoes or not He would get so excited if you force him to Kiss and even lick your shoes! This is especially true if you’re wearing a pair of sexy knee or thigh-high boots, and his hands can travel up your leg. High heels and black glossy boots send submissive men into an aroused frenzy. The bonus for you is its literally putting your foot down in this relationship! and he will live to please you. You can have him spend thirty minutes every evening just kissing and worshiping your feet and heels. Remember Glossy pumps are the ones they crave. They shine and dance light off them they are smooth to the touch and since they are so smooth they are a pleasure for him to kiss and lick ! Some submissive men do not even like feet. However because they are submissive to you they can easily get addicted to your feet and heels! He may not even have a love for feet or shoes. He will love them anyway because of the subservience of it. Especially if you really love shoes. He will want to adore yours with you and grow to like them and yes even wearing them. Its part of the devotion he has for you. It also makes him feel as if you are his superior who is the only person in the world that can be-little him. In some case's the harder you are on him the more excited he becomes.

    Sissy Play –
    Yes very common! The amount of men who fantasize about a women feminizing him is amazing. Take control of him mentally and visually over power him. One evening while he is in the shower sit your self on the bed wearing a knee high pair of black leather boots and a chemise. When he comes out of the shower watch his eyes spring open like a child on Christmas morning ! Stop him from speaking. Tell him to kneel at your feet kiss your boots ! Tell him know from this moment forward you are in charge ! Ask him if he understands then have him kiss your boots again. At this point you can clearly see he is ready for your take charge attitude . Inform him he is to call you Mistress ____ ! Ask him if he is ready to do what ever you demand ! If he is not thrilled beyond belief he must have had a heart attack . This is where you order him to strip naked ! he will obey with no objections because he is thinking like men do and he is naked in a flash ! Now hold out a big pair of pink panties and order him to step into these panties for Mistress ! He will put up some resistance because part of the fantasy is being forced by a women. Just demand ! And he will wiggle right into those panties for you with the smallest amount of coaxing. At this point you show him the pink or white glossy 3 inch pumps he is going to wear for you. Mistress knows you love my shoes so you are going to wear these for me ! Do you understand me ? Be sure to help put them on for him while telling him how nice they look .This will help him believe he is being forced into this. (This is how they want to feel)

    At this point its important to make sure he feels placed. Say something like we well would you look at you. You talk about my heels so much and now your wearing some ! you're a naughty girl for Mistress ! and look at this.... it looks like you like wearing heels for Mistress don't you ? as you point out his excitement! Say something more like I knew you get so excited from wearing these pretty heels . Perhaps add little name calling. This will humble him and make him feel feminized controlled and somewhat humiliated which is what excites him ( the power you have over him )

    Many guys secretly love dressing up in frilly panties and stockings, garter belts and other woman’s clothing. And others do not like it. Either way, you can leverage the “sissifi-cation” of your submissive to your advantage by rewarding him with something pretty or punishing him with it!. Make sure to remind him of how pretty, girly or even submissive he is. Make him repeat things you say to him.

    If you are aiming for punishment, Which is what most submissive men seek , you can spin those comments in a different way, You can even paddle him for the naughtiness of what he is doing or wearing . You can even end arguments with this ! order him into a pair of pink panties and heels and give him a good old fashioned paddling as you tell him he was wrong about your argument then ask him if he understands . He is hopping for this and it can be a lot of fun, Your low heeled sandal makes a excellent paddle for use on a sub-missive's bottom as it is not very noisy yet it has the sting to get your point across. My favorite position when I do this I have him kneel next to the bed I take off one of my pumps and put it on the bed in front of him I push him down so his nose is deep into my shoe and his face is buried in it . I then use my other shoe to paddle him with it as I ridicule him or let him know his tasks. I know he is in submissive heaven as watch him squirm from the loss of power and sting of my heel. Standing, hands on the wall is also a great position for this his heels make his rear so presentable !

    Or surprise him with a gift box one evening . Inside the box is a pair of pink 4 inch glossy pumps and matching pair of panties! And a note that says put these on my darling sissy and get ready to serve me. Paddle him for loving to wear such items He craves your punishment and rewards . When a submissive male opens a gift box to find Glossy pink pumps and matching pink satin panties inside it seriously tells him he is his wife's property and he will do as she says for the rest of his life.

    Depending on his financial situation do not be surprised if he thanks you with a set of keys to a new car ! Or loads of smaller gifts in return

    A submissive husband can be the most rewarding caring loving man you could ever want. He has the ability and desire to please you. And most often will sacrifice everything to do so when you are making his fantasies come true. If more women realized this and would put forth the effort to do this very sort of thing Escorts and Dominia's would be making much less money. You may not believe that your husband could have these desires but he may have them ! You might think No no way this sort of stuff goes on. I promise you dear it does! Walk into a local lingerie toy store and take a look around there is one of these stores on every street corner of almost every town with even a small population.

    Some of the happiest wives whom you may never expect because they may seem quiet, timid and very proper outside. At home she slips on a leather corset and thigh high boots becomes one of the wickedest most dominating goddess's behind closed doors. I myself was very vanilla in bed in a long term marriage when I discovered my husband was a submissive. Once we started playing with it life seems to be so much better . He is devoted to pleasing me and he is much happier himself ! I wish I knew much sooner.

    No matter if you reward him by giving him his own sexy heels to wear or you just wear them to bed yourself, He will instantly have a new found respect for you and your shoe collection. He will naturally want to add to your collection. Now can he really complain if he wears them too? or if you wore them for him to worship. Not all men have submissive fantasies. However I did figure out that the majority of men that actually have a thing for heels would love to be forced into some. While others still may just rather see you in them there is a large majority that would love to submit. Remember its just role playing ladies ! and its actually pretty fun ! Most Men who are into this sort of thing are very heterosexual men. How ever this is one of the hardest things they could ever talk about especially to the spouse.

    When you wear them yourself in the house on occasions aside from “business” for example when you go out for date night . He will appreciate them. Love the look of them and the noise they make on the floor. That noise is always has been an attention grabber. If you only wear them out with your friends or to work He will resent them and never like them. He will begin to think you wear them for other men and not him this is just how a man thinks. This is most likely why he complained in the first place. As for the men who do not pay attention or not care what you are wearing or ever notice you. Perhaps you should be checking on him from time to time. A healthy Marriage is one with communication lots of love and fun and games in and out of the bedroom. What you do in your bedroom is private and can change many things outside of the bedroom.

    Once you have involved this to your sex life you can use it for pleasure or even punishment. I specifically remember my aunt punishing my cousin. He was picking on my sister and constantly making fun of her pink shoes. My aunt told him several times to stop. He told my aunt to shut up! Mistake ! next thing you know he was over her knee and after that he was forced into a pair of pink heels and made to stand in the corner for an hour. You may think I am crazy but I have used this recently instead of make up sex. I have ended many an argument by making him put on heels and giving him a light paddling. Although we hardly ever argue when we do the funny thing is now I win all the arguments. He always ends up saying I am sorry Mistress Tina. ( again its all just fun and games really )

    No more complaints about cost or collection size !!!!

    You now have a husband who not only loves your shoes he wears them in private as well. Or if he is not wearing them you are now including them in your evenings. He has to believe that you are wearing them for him .You will not be hearing any more complaints.

    Is this odd ? you may be thinking ?

    The answer is NO . As a matter of fact way way back when High heels actually started they were a men's shoe. Can you believe it ? You may have a husband who has already done this but just is not able to begin to tell you. Then also consider the fact that today's heels really serve no good purpose other than to appeal to someones or our own eye. Its about looking good and looking sexy ! The truth is they are uncomfortable but we still love to wear them. We do it for attention we do it feel sexy and even desired . Also I have found may shoes available in Very large sizes. This should in itself tell you we ladies are not the only ones wearing them. I personally love how submissive and eager to please my husband gets when he is wearing them not to mention I love looking at shoes anyway. So seeing him in them is Hot to me! I never knew how much of a turn on it would be to have my husband submit to me as he does now. Remember what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas . You might wonder will it make him less of man? NO I think it takes a bigger man to --- shall I say ---step in and do this and want to please a women. Many women have already been doing this. And some women may already have charged your man for it!

    Finding shoes for him

    I prefer a nice 3 inch bright glossy patent classic style closed round toe pump for him. In a pink or white ( never a black or dark ) Dark colored shoes convey power to a man not submission or femininity. And since we are trying to capture his softer side (which they all have ) I say the more feminine the better ! Glossy patent as they have that bright glossy sex appeal to them. The glossy patents appeal to men Wearing them makes him feel feminine and even humble and embarrassed . And those are the feelings that some men are turned on by. I also love a pair with ankle straps because they take longer to put on and hard for him to just kick off. If you are looking to rush this with out going shopping keep in mind that a pair of your own cork bottom high wedges can do in a pinch . As they are usually stretchy on top and a man with bigger feet can just work right into a women's 9 wedge. Eventually you really should just buy some of his own. Buying him his own adds to the picture to him it speaks to him in ways we may never understand as females. It sends him a signal that he is to please you and you are his goddess. His wife gifted him with a pair of Women's patent pumps that he is to wear. This will keep him on his toes ! and give him a feeling that he is your property.

    How to find the right shoe for a man to wear!

    The best choices are going to be :
    A sub should never ever wear black heels ever Black shoes indicate power and only you should wear black.
    Pink , cream , nude or bright whites for him only ! a submissive favorite colors are always high gloss black and red on you
    and Tan nude cream pink or white on himself ! Patent gloss is the best way to own a man .

    Check out a brand called Pleaser they make heels in super gloss with wide width and very large sizes

    First a pair for you an aspiring Mistress has to have a killer pair of black worship pumps
    overstock ITEM# 15757546
    These command his attention !! and will have him drooling !

    visit overstock dot com and search these item numbers for the best shoes you can put him into!
    1) A Classic pink pump
    Color recommended : Hot Pink
    Item Number - 15618332

    2) My favorite open toe pump a treat to see
    Color recommended : Cream Patent
    Item Number - 22895130
    very feminizing in cream patent and a pleasure to look at

    3) A Cream colored sling back with bow
    Color recommended : Cream Patent
    Item Number - 23937204
    ( one of my fav's ) very feminizing ! also a pleasure to look at

    4) Classic patent pump with ankle strap Very feminizing
    Color recommended : White Patent
    Item Number - 15814803
    I love ankle straps on him because they are more involved to get on and off ( never black color for him )

    5) A high platform mary jane
    Color recommended : Hot Pink
    Item Number - 15618331
    Delightful to wear and see

    6) A high Heel with a locking ankle strap
    Color recommended : Red Patent
    Item Number - 23937088
    These are perfect for punishment and to lock him in for an overnight sleep
    you hold the keys!

    How to convert Men shoe size
    men's 9 = women's 10 to 10.5
    men's 10 = women's 11 to 11.5
    men's 11 = women's 11.5 to 12
    men's 12 = women's 12 and 13 for best fit
    men's 13 = women's 14 to 15

    Last edited by ShoeHeelsQueen; 10-15-2017, 06:36 AM.

  • I love this post! It is so true. There certainly a sexual connection between men and women when it comes to high heels. Fab post!


    • This is very awesome I do this with my husband. We discovered it by accident on Halloween I dressed him up and when he wore heels it turned both of us on.
      It has always been very fun. He loves being submissive to me.


      • the shoe thing ........on a Grey's Anatomy episode this past week


        • I adore shoes and handbags and like most women, have many of both.
          Whilst my husband doesn't get why, he is more than happy to buy me either whenever I desire new.
          However, I wear them for me, I like them and enjoy wearing/using them.
          I would not wear shoes in bed or for sexual purposes and I definitely would not buy heels for him & he simply would not want to wear them!!


          • I so wish my wife understood this ~ this is totally true


            • This Is so true! I love Item Number - 22895130 Wish they also made them in hot pink ! I have dominated men like this before. I am sure my husband would love this to he has always been a little bit of a submissive. Thanks for the post has re interested me in this side of me


              • Originally posted by Popcorn&Candy View Post
                I love this post! It is so true. There certainly a sexual connection between men and women when it comes to high heels. Fab post!
                I ❤️ this post too, and totally agree


                • Ok ladies just like it says , this may sound crazy but its so true. I totally do this to my husband and he loves it Women's shoes have been driving men crazy for-ever why else would we wear them?. If your looking for a little spice or a little more power give this a try it is great fun .


                  • love the shoe picks They are awesome !


                    • I must be the only women who doesn't get this


                      • amy40 I doubt your the only women who doesn't get it. First of all its prolly not for every one. My First husband was a submissive . Doing this was great fun. Had I not lost him to a car accident we would be still at these games. The thing is here couples who play together stay together . I think the point is to keep your man interested. And it is correct that men love high heels almost all of them. It just a fun thing in the privacy of your own home. I can tell you my husband was submissive to me He loved when I made him wear things especially heels. And He did everything he could to try and make me happy .



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