[kellied]

Hi, i am 27 and married with 3 children. I have suffered with what i thought was depression since i was 18 but even when the doctors said i had depression i knew deep down it was something else and over the past few months i have noticed a pattern to my 'bad days' and it only happens for about half of the month and the other half i am not so bad. I thought there must be something to this and researched it and found out i am not alone in the way i feel.
For about a week and a half i feel good, life is great, i love my life, my kids everything but then the following week it starts to not look so good, i start to feel annoyed with things that wouldn't normally annoy me and get upset over the silliest of things. Then after about 5 days the 'b***h' appears, thats what i call her. i just feel awful, my husband can nothing right and when i am having my rants on him i can hear the normal self shouting out you are being irrational, but there is nothing i can do about it. i don't want to be a mum anymore and on the worst days i would rather end it all to get away from this pain! i also start to wonder if the 'bad days' person is just highlighting the problems in my life but then when i am happy i am over the moon with the way my life has turned out.
i really need somebody who knows what i am going through to help me, i need to know that it will not always be like this, if not i just don't know what i can do! my husband and kids do not deserve to live with me, i am doing them no favours being the way i am, i need to know what i can do to better myself.

thanks

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Hey sweet, moving this to Menstral Cycle to try to get you replies.

I feel that you need something medical to make things easier, you can't go on with this feeling before and during and only have a few days to be you, the real you.

Let's see what other's have tried.

CW

[Islandgirl]

Hi, I am 33 with 3 children.
I feel like you've just described me to a 't'. I have had terrible 'pms' for many years--since about 18, but over th past few years since having children I've noticed my symptoms have really gotten much worse. Life starts to go downhill quickly about 8-9 days before my period each month. Mood swings, irrational irritability, yelling and crying frequently, ignoring my husband and kids--or complaining about how everything they do is WRONG, withdrawing from friends and family and, on 1-2 days per month actually thinking the world would be better off without me. I feel like I'm having an out of body experience or someone is controlling me with puppet strings. During these days I hate myself and my life and hate everyone around me-- and feel like they all hate me. My eating habits and exercise habits change for the worse---I pig out on and have no motivation to get moving. I have not been diagnosed with PMDD but am 100% positive I have it---I can tick off every symptom necessary for a diagnosis but just haven't been diagnosed yet. I have tried natural progesterone cream to no avail. I have heard it workd wonders for some people. I have decided to have a good chat with the Dr. about trying SSRI's this week. I need to do something as my husband and I are near divorce every month due to this condition and just this am he said that he would be moving out if I didn't get "help". I need help and am willing to try ANYTHING. I don't want to lose my family over this but at the same time they don't deserve to live with Jekyl and Hyde. Good luck Kellied! Please keep updating on what is working for you. I would love to go the all natural route if possible as well but feel I have to try something--NOW!

[GwenMass]

SSRI's saved my life!

I too have struggled with this since I started my periods at age 12. I also didn't realize it was PMS because like most people I thought PMS was 1 or 2 bad days, not HALF of my life! It wasn't until I got married that my husband noticed the pattern. I started reading some things then and I actually think it may have been the first Sarafem (Prozac) commercial about PMDD when the light came on for me. I did some research and ordered some books on PMDD from amazon.com. I could not believe that there was help. As I began to reflect on my life and relationships, I could see the patterns so clearly. I had really always thought all of the ups and downs were external (like the other peoples' fault) until I realized that I literally see the world in 2 very different ways before and after about Day 14 of the cycle.

Long story short, went to the Dr. who put me on anti-depressants and it was like the sun broke through the cloudy skies with the angelic music playing. Seriously. Totally revolutionary for me. There are some side effects and it took a while to get the right dosage (I now take 10 mg of celexa per day all month long to avoid withdrawl effects during the first 2 weeks of cycle). BUT, it is worth it in spades for the trade off in my ability to function and my relationships. I noticed after a few months of being mostly stable and rational that my husband was much more willing to open up to me and our relationship improved greatly. My kids were less afraid of a blowup. My work life was more stable.

After a while I tried to go off. Bad decision! Went back on quickly. I have heard from women with PMDD that they feel much better and don't need meds after menopause. I am waiting to see as I have a ways to go.

Anyway, that's my long testimonial. There is hope. Get some books, do some research. Try the meds. Don't give up if the first one or even a few aren't right. It took me a while. I had panic attacks on one, and was ssllleeeeppppy on another, but Celexa and Lexapro seem to be well tolerated by alot of people I talk to. Wellbutrin is sometimes helpful, but if anger and irritability are a problem for you, it may increase those. Good luck!

[jamies123a]

I too would love to here some replies to this.