[needhelp55]

I was curious because I have heard this from a couple of women before, is it really possible for a woman to have sex and feel absolutely no pleasure and not like anything about it at all. I can only view things from a man's perspective because I am a man and well you get the drift as far as that is concerned. The women I speak of have been abused in their past I'm sure that must play some role in this. But to reiterate my question, is it truly possible for a woman to repeatedly have sex with different partners and never feel an ounce of pleasure of positive feelings?

[WildChild]

Yes women can do this. They can overcome it but it isn't easy, needs a lot of trust and they have to want to. For men, the equivalent is probably having sex but never being emotionally connected. Women can do the opposite, be emotionally connected but physically unresponsive.

[Tarzan31]

Unfortunately, it is true. I was sexually abused in my past and for a long time sex was for the man. I moaned and grunted in all the right places but got absolutely no pleasure from it. It took a long time but in the end, it wasn't an understanding man that got me out of it but my decision to not let what happened to me become who I was. I am not saying that she was abused but usually with women like this sex has a negative connatation. If you are in a relationship with a woman like this and want to stay in that relationship, here is some advice: take it slow, talk to her about what feels good to her and what doesn't, learn to make the bottle of lotion in the bathroom your good friend (lol), and do NOT get angry when she doesn't respond within your timeframe. Ultimately, this is something she is going to have to come to on her own (with your help of course).

[silvertae]

I've heard from some women that this was the case for them early on in their sex lives and that as they got older things got better. Probably extensive exploration, trying out masturbation, and an understanding partner will help things along over time.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Your thread, says something that I may be wrong over.

You understand sexual needs, pleasure and yet, the women you are "sleeping with lately" aren't um, making the noises you wish to hear, your manlyhood, your experiences and so, you put it down to abuse. As, you have questioned.

Or, are these friends that discuss their sexual experiences with you and so you are trying to find an answer? They would have to be way close hey.

So, if you are worried about your manhood and what you are bringing to the table as to the reason for your question, then perhaps pose your "affection" and "concern" for those women when you "make love to them" or is it you do, repetitive as you know it but it's not working?

CW

[needhelp55]

...

Actually it has nothing to do with their sex life with me. I've had great sex with all of these women and been able to bring them to climax. I've felt the contractions after their orgasm. I just find it odd and perhaps unbelievable for lack of a better word that I've heard women discuss such similar experiences from their past. Also, as a man, it is hard to put yourself in the shoes of a woman and I guess experience such 'traumatic' sexual experiences.

[miffed23]

I just find it odd and perhaps unbelievable for lack of a better word that I've heard women discuss such similar experiences from their past. Also, as a man, it is hard to put yourself in the shoes of a woman and I guess experience such 'traumatic' sexual experiences.

Thats exactly it....

If a woman has been sexually abused... why on earth would she connect sex to pleasure?

The mind is a powerful tool. You get stung my a wasp...all wasps are bad / negative / hurtful. See where im going.

So, yes, it is entirely plausable for a woman to feel no pleasure during sex.

[needhelp55]

Thats exactly it....


The mind is a powerful tool. You get stung my a wasp...all wasps are bad / negative / hurtful. See where im going.

That makes sense but why would they put themselves back in those situations? I would assume that if you get stung by a wasp you wouldn't go by a wasp nest.

Again, I am in search of perspective so all comments are welcome. Thanks

[miffed23]

That makes sense but why would they put themselves back in those situations? I would assume that if you get stung by a wasp you wouldn't go by a wasp nest.

But what happens if you stumble across a wasps nest?

Some people wont put themselves in the situation again, but others want to feel 'normal' and not let their past get in the way of happiness. However, maybe when they become intimate, the scars are still too raw and they detach themselves emotionally?

[angel7 baby]

yeah one of my bestfriends had a similar issue.
and she hasnt gone into detail as to why this
has happened. but she made it clear that at one
point and time she enjoyed sex like most women.