[CHANDLERS WISH]

If you knew thats all he wanted before you had sex with him, then surely you cant feel used if you knew what you was letting yourself in for?

Mrs Doodles, OTYA is a male.. He is saying what he knows, what we all know as men, in youth... I think you , think he is a she... based on your reply... please read all responses, the OP agreed with OTYA knowing he was a he.

CW

Will you feel okay after indulging, or will you feel used?

If you knew thats all he wanted before you had sex with him, then surely you cant feel used if you knew what you was letting yourself in for?

[Na-Na]

I'm glad your going with what you feel comfortable with. I can understand the temptation, of course. There's quite a bit of appeal there. Handsome guy all to yourself for a few days at the beach. It's got something of a Hallmark movie haze to it, doesn't it? It would probably be fun, if he's what he appears to be. You probably know people who could vouch for him. It's obvious you want the virginity gone, and he wants to take it. But it could be dangerous. He could be crawling with STIs. You could get there, sleep with him once, and discover he's a complete jerk. Or just find out you don't like him as much as you thought you would. That weekend together isn't any where near as pleasant if you find out he's actually kind of annoying. It's better to know something of a persons habits and everyday manner before spending a ton of alone time together. He was probably on his best behaviour (best for attracting girls, anyway) at the party. He might not be at the beach house.

Anyway, I believe that was a bit rambling, and pointless since you've already made up your mind.

[belleisangelic]

yeah, it's pretty clear to me now what I need to decide..and it seems like the bad is outweighing the good..oh well. I'd rather wait for someone to spend more time with, learn more about and get to know..and a cookout just doesn't cut it haha.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

[quote=SinisterUrge;103465]-Carved In Stone Rules-

*You are not a teenager. If you agree to spend the weekend alone with somebody, you are sending the "I want to have sex with you" signal. If you do not want to have sex with him..... don't go to his house alone![/quote]

I met this guy at a friends cookout a few weeks ago,

Sin, reminded me of "bad movies"....

Something in addition to consider... You don't know this guy from squat, and a beach house is REMOTE...

I don't think I need to add anything else here in that regard.

CW

[SinisterUrge]

-Carved In Stone Rules-

*You are not a teenager. If you agree to spend the weekend alone with somebody, you are sending the "I want to have sex with you" signal. If you do not want to have sex with him..... don't go to his house alone!

what better advice then from a guy that's been there and done that?
thanks so much for your replies, I guess I'll just have to sleep on it..but then again if I'm sleeping on it then it's probably not meant to be. I'm preparing for a 7 day cruise soon, so I'll have ample time to clear my head and figure out if I want to get away or not ( from my family I mean). Thanks guys!

You have a good head on your shoulders. It's just a decision you're going to have to make. Do you want a relationship, or do you want to have casual sex? Make no mistake, that's what he wants - casual sex. Will you feel okay after indulging, or will you feel used?

I'd imagine most women will probably tell you that casual sex is best after you've experienced a few partners first and figured out what you like.

Good luck sweetie - no matter what anyone would have you believe, you are a commodity.

[belleisangelic]

what better advice then from a guy that's been there and done that?
thanks so much for your replies, I guess I'll just have to sleep on it..but then again if I'm sleeping on it then it's probably not meant to be. I'm preparing for a 7 day cruise soon, so I'll have ample time to clear my head and figure out if I want to get away or not ( from my family I mean). Thanks guys!

[Ahryin]

Meh - Why would you make yourself a sex object?

He's probably bragging to his friends right now about the chick he just met that is staying with him at his beach house for a weekend of non committed sex. Oh not to mention she is a VIRGIN! Score!

Save your first time for someone who you have deep feelings for. I've no doubt this strapping young stud is charming indeed. But it's an act. He'll hit it and quit it, guaranteed. And, do you know anything about this guy? What if he has an STD?

How do I know? I used to do shady stuff like that.

Wow to you ladies who condone this type of behavior.

I agree totally, even if he doesn't know you are a virgin he is more than likely planning and talking about it. Especially at that age. You want your first time to be with someone that you Love..not just have a Lusting attraction for. At least that way they will take their time and make your first time greatly memorable and appreciated. You don't even know if you are going to see this cat again. Let me tell you...when I first started dating my SO he would drive an hour and 15mins each way to see me, take me out around town and go home...no nuk nuk I didn't pay for anything and he understood I wasn't playing he was going to wait and get to know ME and ME him before I ever trusted him enough to allow him into my center....

[WildChild]

Don't do what you aren't comfortable with. I think OhThere makes some very good points, from the horses mouth so to speak.