[dude123]

Is there anything about pleasuring her that turns you on? I think that's your problem right there. I've read this whole thread and there's no mention of you pleasuring her, only her doing things for you. Honestly, I wouldn't be too interested in having sex with you either. If it were me, I think I'd be feeling the same way as her, seems like a one-way street. Which could be why sex is what it is with you two now.

im pretty sure i did mention that i love going down on her! it turns me on so much as does fingering her. But as i also mentioned, she is indifferent. ive offered to do it to her without it being during sex and she doenst want it. She only wants that when she needs to get wet for sex. She is almost never wet for sex no matter how much we makeout and stuff beforehand. what u said is basically an assumption that has no basis. When did i say i didnt do anything for her? I go down on her every time before sex, and she turns down my offers of goin down on her or fingering her anytime else. i always try to make her cum before me, i hold it in till im about to explode and she knows that.

[dude123]

Sounds like there's just a lot of resentment in this relationship.

from me or her or both? all i want is her to be into sex and sex acts like i am, cuz id love doig stuff for her every day if she wanted it but she doesnt shes indifferent

[ocularone]

yea i also hear a lot of "i know some moves and techniques that should be rocking her world" instead of hearing you just having a genuine interest and desire to do it to her desire

[dude123]

yea i also hear a lot of "i know some moves and techniques that should be rocking her world" instead of hearing you just having a genuine interest and desire to do it to her desire

Semantics people, thats what im saying i want to make her feel good. I dont even know her desires, i dont think she has any and thats what bothers me. I ask her wat she likes or if she wants me to do something and she say no, she wants nothing. WHen i start trying to just do soemthing she make s me stop. It has to be a set routine with her. By me saying i looked up techniques the point bein gto majke her feel really good! why r u playing smeantics with my words. That is obviously what i meant. I eat her out ever damm time qwe have sex. every time! ishe turns me down when i offer eot finger her or eat her out when its not to get her wet for sex. she doenst want that or anytjhing. She woulkdnt even want sex if i didnt insist. the sex when we do have it has to be a specidifc boring way she wants it which is the exact same every time. Why is this about me? SHe is not fulfilling my needs, she is the one beign selfish. SHe does nothing that i like and when i make it know wat i like (which is nothign weird) she gives me attitude and says hello no basically. I never sya no to her ever. I get down and dirty when i ear her out, and i enjoy it. She sucks me like shes comtose. She never asks if i like it or akes not eof what i say i like. Its her way or the highway. Yet im the selfish one? Man i must not be descriing my situastion properly on here, i must have used the wrong words this is rdiculous. Im the genrous one. I will eat her out for 3 hrs if she wanted especially since she smells great always. She doesnt have any interest in sexual things even tho she says otherwise. So i really dont get it. Im not a mind reader and i try hard and she is indifferent baout sex so thats not my fault.

[dude123]

just to make it clear to the people making me out to be selfish one based on assumptions. This is our sex life - sex once a week never more. Bj's once every 2-3 months. (it went 5 months once) never got a handjob and she knows i like them. never came on her (even tho she said her ex used to) she always tells me no. Bj's are so slow like shes dead. She never touches my penis with her hand except for when she first puts it in her mouth and then its just up and down super slow like shes doing a chore. Sex has to be me eating her out (even tho i make out with her and try to do foreplay as long as posisble to get her into it) then i have to do missionary, then she finishes on top. It can never be different, ever. Never a new position. Never 69. forget anything lke that. I also have to be sitting down for bj's even tho she knows i lke it standing. the list goes on and on. I really dont think im asking for much. I would like 1 or 2 of these things to change thats all. I would absoultely do anything she ask aside from a rim job cuz i think thats disgusting. I would eat her out wihtout needing reciprocation all the time. Id finger her. Id do watever else there is to do to a girl besides rim jobs. But i ask and she wants nothing. If i just try to do it thinking maybe shes embarasassed to ask, she makes me feel stupid and says no. Her indiffeence is kinda hurtful, it makes me feel unnecessary and that she isnt even attracted to me, tho shes says thats not the case when i ask why we only have sex once a week and i always have to initiate. I always inititate, if i didnt wed never do anything sexual.

[LanaBear]

I think there is resentment on your side, which is understandable and there may be some on hers. Unfortunately, we are getting your side of the issue, not hers.

Is she on the pill? How was your sex life when you first got together? How is the rest of your relationship? How long have you been together? How old are the two of you?

I've browsed through the thread and didn't see these questions or answers, so forgive me if they've already been asked.

[Aqemini1977]

just to make it clear to the people making me out to be selfish one based on assumptions. This is our sex life - sex once a week never more. Bj's once every 2-3 months. (it went 5 months once) never got a handjob and she knows i like them. never came on her (even tho she said her ex used to) she always tells me no. Bj's are so slow like shes dead. She never touches my penis with her hand except for when she first puts it in her mouth and then its just up and down super slow like shes doing a chore. Sex has to be me eating her out (even tho i make out with her and try to do foreplay as long as posisble to get her into it) then i have to do missionary, then she finishes on top. It can never be different, ever. Never a new position. Never 69. forget anything lke that. I also have to be sitting down for bj's even tho she knows i lke it standing. the list goes on and on. I really dont think im asking for much. I would like 1 or 2 of these things to change thats all. I would absoultely do anything she ask aside from a rim job cuz i think thats disgusting. I would eat her out wihtout needing reciprocation all the time. Id finger her. Id do watever else there is to do to a girl besides rim jobs. But i ask and she wants nothing. If i just try to do it thinking maybe shes embarasassed to ask, she makes me feel stupid and says no. Her indiffeence is kinda hurtful, it makes me feel unnecessary and that she isnt even attracted to me, tho shes says thats not the case when i ask why we only have sex once a week and i always have to initiate. I always inititate, if i didnt wed never do anything sexual.

Dude123

I am assuming you are very young but you are getting a good amount of sex. once a week is primo! I only get it once a month (pls pray for me). I am 32 yrs and we have been married for 10yrs but when we do make love I am pretty dominant. I don't make request for positions or request head. I am 6ft 2in and 215lbs, I just guide her to the positions I want. I will stop right in the middle of sex and go down on her and tell her "wait, I need to taste that va-jj one more time". For each position I say something as to why I want that position. Like for doggy, I might say "Let me say that fabulous butt of yours" then turn her over.

She loves the fact that I am in control and confident during sex. She actively participates as well too. If I have her in a position she doesn't care for she will guide me to how she likes it. I will grab my and her head (gently) and she gets the picture (I want head) and she will grab my face and place it where she likes. My wife can't stand requests or timidness.

You have tried to find out what pleases her by asking...hasn't worked. Now try by just doing. Try different things to see what pleases her and please yourself while doing it.

[stressed]

Dude123, I remember your older posts about her changing attitude towards sex once you moved in together and that she doesn't seem interested in sex at all. Apparently there hasn't been any progress in that department. If I remember correctly she's also on anti-depressants (forgive me if I'm wrong, my memory has its bad moments).

I'm starting to get the feeling that even though you are only asking for the obvious, she is still going through some issues that keep her from wanting sex in any form. It's not something you do or don't do, there's something else going on in her head/feelings that you have to find out. Otherwise you will end up being very unhappy with her.

[WildChild]

If she is on meds that mess up her sex drive something awful. Perhaps her doctor could make some changes?

[dude123]

I think there is resentment on your side, which is understandable and there may be some on hers. Unfortunately, we are getting your side of the issue, not hers.

Is she on the pill? How was your sex life when you first got together? How is the rest of your relationship? How long have you been together? How old are the two of you?

I've browsed through the thread and didn't see these questions or answers, so forgive me if they've already been asked.

She's been on the pill since way before i met her, and shes been on anti-depressants since well before i met her and nothing has changed same exact meds. We been together a few years. She was totally into sex when we met, like she wanted it all the time and would do anything, it was great. she was so into it and would do it any chamce we got, it would wear me out sometimes, my penis would almost be numb cuz shed want it 4 times in 2 days. But i loved it. After that initial period it normalized as it does in most relationships but it was still at a decent level. After the first yr and a half it totally slowed to a crawl tho. i dont do anythign different im the same exact guy, so i dont know wat the problem is. She never ever initiates until i finally snap and say something and then she does it just to rpove that she does it for like a few weeks but then it goes righ tback to normal. I mean i dunno if its the same for women, but im a guy and i crave sex. Im supposed to if im a healthy male. She doesnt seem to crave it ever. She is just indifferent. Like she cums and moans and screams and she squirts sometimes so i know she is getting off and feeling gfreat when she does. But its like its just a result to her. I don ever see her wanting that result. Its as if i have to initiate and she kinda doesnt really want to and just gives in here or there and then ewventually feels great as she has a massive orgasm. It baffles me. If someone got me to a massive orgasm that made me scream i would want that every day! lol i dont get it, i know im not the best at sex i dont last that long sometimes but i always last long enuff to get her off and she is not faking trust me i feel her squiriting and feel the muscle contractions and see her lose her breath and then see her stuff afterwards. So trust me its not fake.