[msconfused]

So my boyfrend and I have a pretty good sex life. He is very into pleasing which is great but he has tried to learn this technique called "The Ultimate Orgasm" which is him using his hand to press on my lower abdomen his fingers rubbing what he thinks is my gspot. Okay, it hurts like and makes me feel like I have to pee and I have told him this several times but he says the feeling of me having to pee is just me about to have an orgasm. I sooo beg to differ, it is not pleasant at all and I can't get him to stop and I feel like he might be damaging things in there. I have tried to show him what feels good but I can't get it through his head, well the one attached to his neck I mean, haha. Any advice on how I can fix this would be greatly appreciated.

[Hopeless Dork]

He needs to understand that all women are different... the technique he's using would make some women scream with pleasure, and others cringe with discomfort or just be bored and annoyed because thats not where there hot spot is.

For me I enjoy INTENSE pressure on my gspot and my boyfriend provides it for me ... but he didn't just say this is what you are supposed to like... he started out trying different things and learned what felt good to ME, personally. Thats what yours needs to do for you. There is no instruction manual to all womens vajajays... we all have different hot spots, we all like different amounts of pressure and we all like different focal points addressed...

Its great that he's studying up ways to please you, but needs to understand that you are the best info source when it comes to learning how to please you, that you are the one that knows what feels good to you.

[jns]

So my boyfrend and I have a pretty good sex life. He is very into pleasing which is great but he has tried to learn this technique called "The Ultimate Orgasm" which is him using his hand to press on my lower abdomen his fingers rubbing what he thinks is my gspot. Okay, it hurts like and makes me feel like I have to pee and I have told him this several times but he says the feeling of me having to pee is just me about to have an orgasm. I sooo beg to differ, it is not pleasant at all and I can't get him to stop and I feel like he might be damaging things in there. I have tried to show him what feels good but I can't get it through his head, well the one attached to his neck I mean, haha. Any advice on how I can fix this would be greatly appreciated.

Does he give you clitoral orgasms?

[LilahX]

If he's doing something you have expressly told him you aren't enjoying he is totally insensitive and selfish. He thinks he's got a technique which will make hm out to be a great lover. Perhaps tell him that a great lover is one who listens to his lady and is willing to learn rather than subjecting her to something which he obviously isn't doing right.

[Olympia]

I agree with HD in that, because one may experience pleasure from, while another may not.

I also agree, that when something is not.. You need to put a stop to it. I have had to stop
my husband from something similar. It is a difficult subject to approach. You do not wish to hurt
their feelings, but you feel hurt from the particular act they wish to perform on you. You need to find a way to communicate this to him. Before it causes any injury or infection.
For me, it took a visit to the Doc.'s office as i had a nasty UTI, from such foreplay. He talks about it from time to time, but I am adamant.. (NO).

[realtruck]

We men are idiots when it comes to these things. You will have to convince him he doesn't know what he is doing without hurting his feelings. If you haven't yet, I would suggest getting him to watch you closely as you bring yourself to orgasm. Show him just how to touch, and where. Explain that all women are different. See if you can get him to do the same. Try asking him to guide you as you do anything he desires, you may learn something too. You may not not be a g-spot girl, but if you are, find it yourself, then show him. Just a thought from an old guy married many years to the same wonderful lady who showed me years ago. I have gotten so turned on talking about this, we're gonna have fun when she walks in the door!